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Old 01-22-2011, 10:01 PM
 
183 posts, read 392,157 times
Reputation: 74

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Quote:
Originally Posted by summers19 View Post
That is just over the line. Pulling down a kid's pants is wrong and disturbing, for any reason other than showing a toddler how to use the bathroom. There are so many things wrong with this line of thinking I can't even begin to go there. Way to psychologically, sexually, etc. f@*k up a person for a very long time, if not forever.
Indeed. I can understand spanking as a decent form of discipline, but some of the things parents used to do in the '50s and '60s is absolutely horrifying and barbaric.

 
Old 01-22-2011, 10:29 PM
 
2,159 posts, read 3,734,128 times
Reputation: 2136
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moth View Post
A drinking buddy of mine said his father beat his tail. Once he claimed innocence, but still received a whupping. Then evidence emerged that he was indeed innocent and told his father so. His father replied: "You probably did something I do not know about." My friend said he was right.

Perhaps its a cultural thing, but nearly all of my African-American colleagues have stories where they were told to go outside and break a switch off of a tree, bring it back to mom or dad, and get a whupping with it.
Ah, the old get your own switch bit. My grandma made me do that once. I tried getting the smallest one though..lol. I also got a spanking with a piece of race track once for swearing, must have been 6 or 7. That hurt, but it taught me a lesson. I was spanked about 3 or 4 times MAX as a child. And guess what, I didn't turn out to be a criminal, a tramp, a druggie or an alcoholic
 
Old 01-22-2011, 10:35 PM
 
183 posts, read 392,157 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moth View Post
A drinking buddy of mine said his father beat his tail. Once he claimed innocence, but still received a whupping. Then evidence emerged that he was indeed innocent and told his father so. His father replied: "You probably did something I do not know about." My friend said he was right.
That's what I don't get. He was beaten just because the dad assumed he did something wrong. I don't care what culture you come from, that's child abuse in my mind.
 
Old 01-23-2011, 11:07 AM
 
47,576 posts, read 58,699,632 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CAVA1990 View Post
If it's good enough to use on the wife it's probably okay for the child. However, never use anything on either that's wider than your thumb - which is of course the meaning behind "the rule of thumb".
My grandfather would have disagreed with that -- back in those days, kids were told to find the switch or branch that was to be used and he said it was the thinner ones that stung the worst.

He advised us to pick the thicker ones if our parents ever resorted to that.
 
Old 01-23-2011, 11:11 AM
 
47,576 posts, read 58,699,632 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
I don't advocate hitting kids at all. But teenagers, a different story. Willful, misbehavior is an issue that needs to be dealt with appropriately, and sometimes...corporal punishment makes more of an impact...My son never took my car again without permission...and never lied to me, that I know about, after that...and I am not a parent who ever thought that corporal punishment was ever appropriate. But one time....and he knew he crossed the line...
I think it's the opposite - if you gain respect while the kids are young, they may need only a rare swat on the behind and nothing more.

I think if you wait until they are age 14 or 15 to start disciplining, you can have big problems and a serious lack of respect. It's too late then and a tap on the rear end won't accomplish it and frustrated parents can go too far.

I believe the time to punish is when you are not angry at all and are in full control - which can be when the child is 4 and showing disrespect. You make them respect you then, it requires much less.
 
Old 01-23-2011, 12:18 PM
 
Location: So. of Rosarito, Baja, Mexico
6,571 posts, read 17,949,017 times
Reputation: 5919
Lot of opinions here but NOT one person has stated the exact number of kids they raised and the experiences therein.

My mother raised just me and tried to tell me how to raise and/or disipline my kids. My wife from a former marriage had two and we together had five more...seven altogether.

Now this was a family and bound to be a problem with one or more using the % factor.

Always had one boy that was stretching the limit with me and as a result he got the switch and belt on more then one occasion. I hated to do this but it also was a lesson to the others NOT to cross the "good person" line and thankfully things worked out well with all of them.

The one that gave me the headache has a daughter and a son...soon to be a grandfather with the daughter that got married last year. The son got the (threatened belt) treatment and things worked out well with him in that respect. So you see both threats of punishment can have good results.

As for me, I grew uop in the 30's so am from the real old school. There are a few on C-D that are a little younger then me as one person referred to the 50's as being a bad time period re punishment as child abuse.

Never having gone around the barn a few times they have NO idea.

Cannot recall who said it..."spare the rod and spoil the child".
 
Old 01-23-2011, 02:22 PM
 
183 posts, read 392,157 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve Bagu View Post
Lot of opinions here but NOT one person has stated the exact number of kids they raised and the experiences therein.

My mother raised just me and tried to tell me how to raise and/or disipline my kids. My wife from a former marriage had two and we together had five more...seven altogether.

Now this was a family and bound to be a problem with one or more using the % factor.

Always had one boy that was stretching the limit with me and as a result he got the switch and belt on more then one occasion. I hated to do this but it also was a lesson to the others NOT to cross the "good person" line and thankfully things worked out well with all of them.

The one that gave me the headache has a daughter and a son...soon to be a grandfather with the daughter that got married last year. The son got the (threatened belt) treatment and things worked out well with him in that respect. So you see both threats of punishment can have good results.

As for me, I grew uop in the 30's so am from the real old school. There are a few on C-D that are a little younger then me as one person referred to the 50's as being a bad time period re punishment as child abuse.

Never having gone around the barn a few times they have NO idea.

Cannot recall who said it..."spare the rod and spoil the child".
In this day an age, you really don't need to use belts and rods to keep the kid in line. People back then took the "spare the rod and spoil the child" phrase way to literally.
 
Old 01-23-2011, 03:24 PM
 
47,576 posts, read 58,699,632 times
Reputation: 22158
Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve Bagu View Post
Lot of opinions here but NOT one person has stated the exact number of kids they raised and the experiences therein.

My mother raised just me and tried to tell me how to raise and/or disipline my kids. My wife from a former marriage had two and we together had five more...seven altogether.

Now this was a family and bound to be a problem with one or more using the % factor.

Always had one boy that was stretching the limit with me and as a result he got the switch and belt on more then one occasion. I hated to do this but it also was a lesson to the others NOT to cross the "good person" line and thankfully things worked out well with all of them.

The one that gave me the headache has a daughter and a son...soon to be a grandfather with the daughter that got married last year. The son got the (threatened belt) treatment and things worked out well with him in that respect. So you see both threats of punishment can have good results.

As for me, I grew uop in the 30's so am from the real old school. There are a few on C-D that are a little younger then me as one person referred to the 50's as being a bad time period re punishment as child abuse.

Never having gone around the barn a few times they have NO idea.

Cannot recall who said it..."spare the rod and spoil the child".
That's a good point - the number of children - because it's far easier to control one or two kids than six or seven.

It also depends a lot on the individual child, some children are extremely docile and will never step out of line, others are very defiant by nature. Even in a large family there will be some kids who need almost no discipline, others that are very headstrong and challenge everything.

Discipline is for the child, it shouldn't be about an angry parent except with teenagers (something like drinking the beer up or taking the car without permission) and it should be what's ultimately good for the child.
 
Old 01-23-2011, 04:57 PM
 
183 posts, read 392,157 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post
That's a good point - the number of children - because it's far easier to control one or two kids than six or seven.

Discipline is for the child, it shouldn't be about an angry parent except with teenagers (something like drinking the beer up or taking the car without permission) and it should be what's ultimately good for the child.
Absolutely. When parents are disciplining their kids, they should be thinking about teaching lessons, not blowing off steam.
 
Old 01-23-2011, 05:27 PM
 
Location: So. of Rosarito, Baja, Mexico
6,571 posts, read 17,949,017 times
Reputation: 5919
A cop pulls you over for a moving violation. Does he give you a verbal lecture or does he write you a ticket as punishment?

If they pull you over a ticket is going to be written...NO lecture by any means...then again I was once lectured a little and also given a ticket.
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