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Old 05-14-2009, 05:19 PM
 
Location: GIlbert, AZ
3,022 posts, read 4,382,052 times
Reputation: 2047

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It makes me cringe when I hear people say "its the same world now as it was when we were growing up". No it isn't.
Teenage pregnancy and drug use are higher now then they were back then.
Pedophiles are getting more and more creative at ways to get at our kids. For example: having your childs name emprinted on their clothes or backpack gives the pedophile a good way to earn their trust. "Hey, Manny! Your mom was hurt and is in the hospital. I'm your neighbor, Mike. I'm supposed to rush you there to see her."

It seems like I'm always hearing of little children drowning. A parent lays down for a nap or answers the phone and the little one finds their way out to the pool and drowns.

In my childhood, seatbelts were optional so most of the time I went without. I even took a few long drives on the freeway sitting in the back of my uncles pickup (unsecured, no canopy). Now we know such a concept is obsurd.

Where I live drivers frequently dont obey the speed limits in parking lots and will speed through them. Several times I've had to hold my son back as a car, who supposed to yield right of way, speeds past us. Not too mention the distracted drivers on cell phones....

I've noticed also parents with more than one child are much more care free about their safety--letting them sit alone in a car, unattended, for 10 minutes with the windows down and unlocked for instance. Is it because they have a "spare"?
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Old 05-14-2009, 06:29 PM
 
5,748 posts, read 10,508,248 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Foreverking View Post
I've noticed also parents with more than one child are much more care free about their safety--letting them sit alone in a car, unattended, for 10 minutes with the windows down and unlocked for instance. Is it because they have a "spare"?
This comment leaves me completely flabbergasted. You can't possibly believe this, can you?

Last edited by formercalifornian; 05-14-2009 at 07:00 PM..
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Old 05-14-2009, 06:54 PM
 
Location: GIlbert, AZ
3,022 posts, read 4,382,052 times
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Perhaps being the parent of only one child I am over cautious about certain things. He is, after all, a one-of-a-kind limited-edition. If anything ever happened to him, I dont have a "fall back" kid so to speak.
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Old 05-14-2009, 07:06 PM
 
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Since you have an only, I'll chalk that comment up to not understanding the dynamics of a multi-child family. Please know that those of us who have more than one child love and cherish each one to the very depth of our beings. I think what you're seeing is not the result of valuing our children less, but rather the result of experience teaching us that we were over-protective the first time around. Second (and third, and fourth) children are often given more freedoms than the first-born because, as parents, we've learned to trust our instincts in judging each child's capabilities.

Last edited by formercalifornian; 05-14-2009 at 07:19 PM..
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Old 05-14-2009, 07:21 PM
 
1,986 posts, read 3,468,180 times
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formercalifornian, I tried to rep you on your last post, but had previously so this will have to do.

I do not understand why over-protective parents think they are better parents because they over-protect. They do their children no favors, and they think they love their children more. HA
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Old 05-14-2009, 07:27 PM
 
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Thank you, Stormy. Tried to be-friend you, but your profile is closed.

On another note, an acquaintance has convinced me that I should never accept parenting advice from someone with fewer than three children or all girls!
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Old 05-14-2009, 07:31 PM
 
1,986 posts, read 3,468,180 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by formercalifornian View Post
Thank you, Stormy. Tried to be-friend you, but your profile is closed.

On another note, an acquaintance has convinced me that I should never accept parenting advice from someone with fewer than three children or all girls!
Thanks. The closure is due to an ongoing feud with another member.
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Old 05-14-2009, 07:33 PM
 
Location: England
1,171 posts, read 2,187,226 times
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I think it is more dangerous today than when I was young. More traffic on the road. More weirdos around - now on 'drugs' which blow the mind, we didn't have to deal with that! More internet sites luring kids in to goodness knows what. Scary! Think about the headlines...everyday its terrible news...I cannot remember it being so bad when I was young. At the end of the day, as parents we have to decide if we could live with the knowledge that our child has been lured away by a paedophile whilst he/she was riding the tube at 9 years of age. I know I would rather be safe than sorry. Of course we have to let our children do things, get out and about, but I really believe that the world has gotten more dangerous and seedy. IMO
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Old 05-14-2009, 08:01 PM
 
1,986 posts, read 3,468,180 times
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All the more reason to equip our children with what they need to be independent from us in a safe manner. Overprotecting them does not prepare them for independence in this world. Parents cannot hold their hands until they are 40 or older.

By overprotecting, kids do not learn how to handle themselves in adverse circumstances or know how to make solid decisions on their own.

In essence, by overprotecting kids, it is ensuring that they are not prepared to exist in this world on their own when they become adults, so what you get is a more dangerous world and less prepared young adults.

Personally, I would rather mine be independent and prepared to handle what the world will be like in another 5 years. She's 15.
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Old 05-14-2009, 08:10 PM
 
Location: England
1,171 posts, read 2,187,226 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stormy night View Post
All the more reason to equip our children with what they need to be independent from us in a safe manner. Overprotecting them does not prepare them for independence in this world. Parents cannot hold their hands until they are 40 or older.

By overprotecting, kids do not learn how to handle themselves in adverse circumstances or know how to make solid decisions on their own.

In essence, by overprotecting kids, it is ensuring that they are not prepared to exist in this world on their own when they become adults, so what you get is a more dangerous world and less prepared young adults.

Personally, I would rather mine be independent and prepared to handle what the world will be like in another 5 years. She's 15.
Yes, I Agree - prepare them, but chucking them in headlong - for instance letting them ride all over town on the bus at 9 - is asking for trouble.
I was given loads of freedom - but even I, back in the 70's saw a few flashershad one man stopping his car and asking me and my best friend if we could get in his car and show him the way somewhere - we said NO!!! And other things have happened. So I know - even though I grew up in a village a really nice one, that bad things happen.

Things have changed. Drastically. Research. Look at the papers from just 10 years ago compared to today. The world has taken a slide down, so I think we need to be a bit more careful. My kids go out and play. They have freedom - TO A CERTAIN EXTENT. I want to see my kids grow up. I don't want to be greieving and weeping....
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