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Old 05-14-2009, 01:25 PM
 
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One thing that always shocks me when I go to family or friends social events is how uncommunicative the kids are and the parents seem not to care. If I had kids one of the things I would drill into him/her is the ability to interact with adults. I am not expecting an adult conversation at an early age but at least some polite greetings and an attempt at a little small talk.

Why do so many parents not teach their kids to interact with adults? Or is it an impossible chore?
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Old 05-14-2009, 01:35 PM
 
Location: Orlando, FL
12,256 posts, read 15,798,073 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Weekend Traveler View Post
One thing that always shocks me when I go to family or friends social events is how uncommunicative the kids are and the parents seem not to care. If I had kids one of the things I would drill into him/her is the ability to interact with adults. I am not expecting an adult conversation at an early age but at least some polite greetings and an attempt at a little small talk.

Why do so many parents not teach their kids to interact with adults? Or is it an impossible chore?
One thing I'm trying to teach my son is to look at people when he talks to them. He is NOT shy but whenever someone says "hi" to him, he holds his head down and mumbles it to his feet. My boyfriend complains that I sound like a drill sargent because I'm always saying "Hold your head up" "say thank you" "open your mouth" "say please" but I figure I need to teach him while he's young before I send him off into the world not knowing how to act.
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Old 05-14-2009, 01:42 PM
 
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Never had that problem. My daughter has been raised primarily around adults and has never had trouble communicating. I've had people remark on her being the only kid they know who will look them in the eye while speaking with them.
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Old 05-14-2009, 02:07 PM
 
1,425 posts, read 3,525,284 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Weekend Traveler View Post
One thing that always shocks me when I go to family or friends social events is how uncommunicative the kids are and the parents seem not to care. If I had kids one of the things I would drill into him/her is the ability to interact with adults. I am not expecting an adult conversation at an early age but at least some polite greetings and an attempt at a little small talk.

Why do so many parents not teach their kids to interact with adults? Or is it an impossible chore?
Yes, there are children who do not know how to speak to adults. Stranger danger, coccooning their lives, shy whatever all contribute.

But what catches my eye is that you use your family as a model of the behavior you do not like. Would this be the same family that refuses to take in their blood twin boys? Could it be that since the adults have little respect for the children, they, in turn, have little respect for the adults? I've read a few of your posts and you say "if I had kids.... this" or "if I had kids.... that", the fact is, you do not have children, you choose not to be a strong factor in a child's life and you don't understand how they think. Have you ever thought that your attitude toward the children in your family shows enough that they do not wish share "small talk" with you?
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Old 05-14-2009, 02:19 PM
 
11,615 posts, read 19,731,699 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Weekend Traveler View Post
One thing that always shocks me when I go to family or friends social events is how uncommunicative the kids are and the parents seem not to care. If I had kids one of the things I would drill into him/her is the ability to interact with adults. I am not expecting an adult conversation at an early age but at least some polite greetings and an attempt at a little small talk.

Why do so many parents not teach their kids to interact with adults? Or is it an impossible chore?
If you read this thread you will have your answer:

Do you allow your kids to take part in adult conversations?

I was shocked at how many people felt it was inappropriate for kids to converse with adults.
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Old 05-14-2009, 04:34 PM
 
Location: Australia
1,492 posts, read 2,656,886 times
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When visitors arrive, TV off. Stand up.
Look at adults when you speak.
Answer questions.
Do not question adults.
Call adults My or Mrs so and so.
If adults are talking, then wait to be invited to participate in the conversation.
When you go to a friends place, introduce yourself to the parents.
Thank parents when you leave.
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Old 05-14-2009, 04:44 PM
 
2,838 posts, read 8,849,189 times
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Yes, we're out and about every day in our adventures, so my kids are used to speaking to everyone from dentists to clerks at grocery stores to the librarian to extended family members.

Quote:
Originally Posted by aidxen View Post
When visitors arrive, TV off. Stand up.
Look at adults when you speak.
Answer questions.
Do not question adults.
Participating in asking as well as answering questions is part of conversing. If someone we know went on a trip, for example, I'd encourage my kids to say "how was your vacation?" or "What did you see in Italy?"
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Old 05-14-2009, 04:47 PM
 
Location: CITY OF ANGELS AND CONSTANT DANGER
5,409 posts, read 11,076,179 times
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exactly! im with you.

i teach my kids to act respectfully and to interact appropriately.

i hate when adults ask little children how old they are, and all the child does is throw up some fingers.

speak!!!!

use your words!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by natalayjones View Post
One thing I'm trying to teach my son is to look at people when he talks to them. He is NOT shy but whenever someone says "hi" to him, he holds his head down and mumbles it to his feet. My boyfriend complains that I sound like a drill sargent because I'm always saying "Hold your head up" "say thank you" "open your mouth" "say please" but I figure I need to teach him while he's young before I send him off into the world not knowing how to act.
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Old 05-14-2009, 05:22 PM
 
2,005 posts, read 5,125,446 times
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My main thing is being polite, looking at the adult when talking to them and answering questions. I don't expect my 6 year old to hold a great conversation with a grown up. She does talk to adults that she feels comfortable with, but not to strangers. I am trying to teach her the yes ma'am yes sir thing since we live in the south and it's so common here. I kind of like when a child says yes ma'am to me.
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Old 05-14-2009, 06:39 PM
 
13,468 posts, read 14,462,377 times
Reputation: 7650
Quote:
Originally Posted by aidxen View Post
When visitors arrive, TV off. Stand up.
Look at adults when you speak.
Answer questions.
Do not question adults.
Call adults My or Mrs so and so.
If adults are talking, then wait to be invited to participate in the conversation.
When you go to a friends place, introduce yourself to the parents.
Thank parents when you leave.
That's the same way my wife and I are raising our son.

We're amused by the number of middle school-aged kids who can't converse, won't look you in the eye, shake hands etc.
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