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Old 05-17-2009, 04:45 PM
 
54 posts, read 56,059 times
Reputation: 22

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sleddog905 View Post
Not in Australia. We Americans spell some words differently than other English speaking nations.

You've completely changed your tone from responsible young adult to a bratty teenager. You've certainly lost some sympathy, for what that's worth.

Sorry If I came off that way but I am sick and tired of being stereotyped. "Oh you're a teen you need supervision." "If you aren't supervised you'll do bad things."

I hear it so much and it pisses me off.
My age has no relavance. Just because I am 19 and a teenager doesn't mean I need to be treated as such.

My main point here is I do not need rules like everyother teen.
I do not need a bed time and a wakeup time..thats too controlling.
I do not need to be supervised because I am not doing anything to warrant the need to be supervised.
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Old 05-17-2009, 04:49 PM
 
54 posts, read 56,059 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
Another scenario is that while you are up until 4am then sleep until 1 or 2 while she is at work, then she comes home to a messy house and a grouchy teenager who is up all night, sleeps all day and doesn't at the very least contribute toward keeping the house up and helping with chores/cooking etc even if she can't financially assist. Living as a legal adult in your parents house is difficult on both parties. I'm betting your mom still pays for your food, health insurance, auto insurance, internet access, utilities at the least (perhaps helps with tuition/books/exenses also?). Your cell phone bill is quite small compared to these things. You mentioned that you never go out as if that were a point of pride. Perhaps she is hoping by limiting your internet, that you will develop actual "in person" friends and interests. Maybe you are grouchy or she never sees you. It could be that she doesn't get that while she is providing all of this, you aren't doing what you can to make life easier for her (even if you can't help financially).

You assumed a lot right there.
I do help around the house. I mentioned I dont make messes. I keep my room and bathroom cleaned and I take care of the cats and help out with the trash. And I do my own laundry.
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Old 05-17-2009, 04:52 PM
 
Location: St. Louis Metro East
515 posts, read 1,366,598 times
Reputation: 323
She may not be concerned about waking you up, as you are a heavy sleeper, but you said she is a light sleeper. Is it possible that you are keeping her from sleeping, even though I'm sure it's not intentional? We have the same issue in my house. 16 yo DD is a night owl, and a deep sleeper. DH is neither. Even things that I couldn't hear if I was listening for them will wake him u pfrom a dead sleep, and he cannot get back to sleep when that happens. Perhaps she's giving you the opportunity to show your maturity by respectfully adhering to her rules.

Adults devise a plan and follow it. Children do what feels good. Maybe it's really not all about you.

~D
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Old 05-17-2009, 04:57 PM
 
54 posts, read 56,059 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by cpg35223 View Post
Well, here's the deal. Biologically, you're an adult, but emotionally you've decided to remain a dependent on your parent. That in and of itself is not a bad thing, but you can't expect to continue living with your parents and do whatever the heck you want. And paying a small amount of money doesn't buy you the right to do whatever.

If you want freedom, you need to earn it. Work a real job that pays real money. Pay for an apartment, even if it means getting a roommate. But if you're living at home and paying a pittance towards the expenses of running the household, then you're really in no position to complain.

In short, her house, her rules.
Decided to remain dependent?
I decided to get mono, decided to miss 2 months of school, decided to use my money to help with medical bills instead of getting a car...
And then I decided to go to a 2 year college for now instead of a 4 year because I didn't have the money.

Yes,I decided all that. I had wonderful plans of going off to a 4 year and dorming. I planned on buying a car and being on my own by now.
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Old 05-17-2009, 05:00 PM
 
54 posts, read 56,059 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beth56 View Post
And our, has an H.
haha it does..typos suck
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Old 05-17-2009, 05:19 PM
 
756 posts, read 1,950,677 times
Reputation: 621
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrappednHades View Post
Sorry If I came off that way but I am sick and tired of being stereotyped. "Oh you're a teen you need supervision." "If you aren't supervised you'll do bad things."

I hear it so much and it pisses me off.
My age has no relavance. Just because I am 19 and a teenager doesn't mean I need to be treated as such.

My main point here is I do not need rules like everyother teen.
I do not need a bed time and a wakeup time..thats too controlling.
I do not need to be supervised because I am not doing anything to warrant the need to be supervised.
Do you realize your point of view is what it is BECAUSE you are a teen!!
Of course you and every other teen alive do not want rules or supervision. Find me a teen who wants a bedtime and wakeup time...

You live with your mother, follow her rules. You seem to be moving in the right direction as far as your education goes. Continue your education, save your money, graduate, get a job, and move out. Time will pass incredibly fast. It doesn't seem like that now, but trust me, it will.

Thank your mom for caring enough about you to set some guidelines.
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Old 05-17-2009, 06:14 PM
 
Location: Australia
1,492 posts, read 2,666,452 times
Reputation: 1697
If you came to stay with me, the first thing we would do is deal with your attitude (corporally).
Then we would teach you respect for adults.
Then you would have a pre set bed time. Starting with 10pm and we would adjust it depending on how much difficulty you had getting up on time.
You would be at school or at a job on time.
You would have some chores around the house that would get done.
Then you might get to use the computer in a family area. There would not be computer or TV in your bed room.
Because what you need is exactly what you claim you don't need.
You need to be controlled and disciplined so that you can actually get over that teen tood and build some self respect and self control and when you displayed those traits then we would loosen the strings.
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Old 05-17-2009, 06:55 PM
 
Location: southwestern PA
20,426 posts, read 35,951,296 times
Reputation: 38850
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrappednHades View Post

My main point here is I do not need rules like everyother teen.
Why not?

You're not acting like a mature adult....
children need boundaries.

Or are you just "special"?
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Old 05-17-2009, 06:58 PM
 
Location: NE Florida
9,362 posts, read 22,395,698 times
Reputation: 9265
Quote:
Originally Posted by TrappednHades View Post
Long story short I graduated HS a semester late due to mono. So I am 19 and my graduation is coming up in less than a week. Meaning I still live at home. I have a semester of college under my belt so far and plan on continuing.

I am well behaved. I never go out..no really I mean it. Its either school or home, right now only home because I finished up my college semester last monday.

Right now, I do not have a job but have one lined up to start at the beginning of June, I'll be working as a lifeguard. And I plan on helping my mom out with finances. I do not have a car so she will be taking me.

I know I am relying on my mom for a lot right now and I am living rent free and am not having to pay for anything like cell phone and what not. I will be going on my own plan March '10 when the contract is up. I plan on paying for my portion of the phone bill and helping out with what I can.


Really, I have no place to complain but I am at wits end here and could just about implode from frustration.
My mom is trying to give me a bed time and an internet curfew. She wants me off my laptop by 2am and going to sleep. I know that sounds generous and all but it really isn't. I am a night person, I like being up at night. Plus I turn 20 in less than 3 months. Who does this to a 20 year old?

Its quiet silly IMHO.
Im not out partying all night.
I don't sneak out.
I don't even socialize with people, the people I met in HS are too immature and I rather not be around them.

I am a moderator for frostwire, I am enjoying it.
Its not my top priority and I won't be on as much when my job starts but for right now until June, its what I have to do.

I am getting sick and tired of my mom trying to enforce this. I am 19 and can and should be able to decide what time I go to bed.
I am not up making noise. I am in my room door shut with my lights off, tv off, head phones in, just as quiet as I would be if I were asleep.

My mom simply wants to control me. She has this idea of how life should go and if anyone deviates from it they aren't normal.


I need some help, advice, anything.



Edit:

During the week go to bed by 2am.
During weekends go to bed no later than 4am.
Regardless of time you go to sleep you need to be up by 10am on mornings you donít have to work or go to school.
This is part of what my mom just wrote. She wrote up a list of rules for me.

Simple solution. If you don't want to live under mommy's rules, get your own place and pay your own way. When you are responsible like a grown up, you can do as you please.
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Old 05-17-2009, 08:11 PM
 
Location: Victoria TX
42,668 posts, read 71,883,334 times
Reputation: 35910
Get used to doing things her way. Every other kid did. Get up early. Become a night person next year.
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