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Old 05-28-2009, 07:11 AM
Location: Penobscot Bay, the best place in Maine!
1,891 posts, read 5,158,896 times
Reputation: 2632


Originally Posted by Jane72 View Post
I think some of the respondents must have missed the first line of the OP, which was:

"My son chose to live with his grandparents when he was fifteen."

Ooh, the poor wittle baby! Thank god he's got grandparents to love and care for him! Some people don't deserve to have children! Ooh, you bad, bad, heartless man!

Look, I'll be damned if I'll pay for my over-18 son to live, by choice, with someone else.
If they want him, let them pay his way.
If he wants them, let him pay his own way.

If he wants my support beyond the age of 18, he'll "choose" to move home, just like he "chose" to move away a couple of years ago.

In my experience, it's a lot cheaper to support your kid under your own roof than under somebody else's. At least if they live with you, it's only one roof you're having to pay for.
So basically, non-custodial parents shouldn't have to support their kids?
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Old 05-28-2009, 07:21 AM
Location: Here... for now
1,747 posts, read 2,625,411 times
Reputation: 1208
Originally Posted by Jane72 View Post
More freedom, probably.
Why else do teenage boys choose to do anything?
I'm gonna guess it's not because he wanted more hugs, more discipline, or more home-baked cookies.

Not to sound cynical, but, you know... I am the parent of a teenager.
Also, I used to be one.
I don't think we can fairly assume all teenage boys make all the choices they do for "freedom" or for any one singular motive. It's just not as simple as that. And yes, perhaps the young man in question DID move because he wanted more hugs, more love, more attention, more respect. There could be any number of reasons and until the OP defines what those reasons are/were, we're all just guessing. And placing our own pasts and experiences in the mix.

You're the parent of a teen, Jane. So am I. From what I've seen of some of your other posts, your experiences with parenting, particularly parenting your teen, have been very different from mine. That may partially explain why we're looking at this same set of information in such vastly different ways. Each of our own circumstances has colored our views.

By the way, I'm a former teen, too .
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Old 05-28-2009, 12:15 PM
Location: Norwood, MN
1,828 posts, read 3,286,685 times
Reputation: 871
Originally Posted by azeagle View Post
My son chose to live with his grandparents when he was 15 yrs old. At this time his grandparents and I had a verbal agreement on a set amount I would pay them each month for his care. He is now about to turn 18 yrs old. They told me that they wanted me to pay until he is 19yrs old or out of high school. I had only planned on paying until his 18th birthday. My question is am I leagally obligated to pay until he is out of high school? I have full legal custody and recieve no child support payments from his mother. Their is no court order requiring me to make payments to his grandparents.
Too many men shoot their load of cream without any realization of what may eventually be expected of them. if you have no parental skills or instincts, get a vasectomy!!!!!! And in the case of women, get a tubal ligation!!!!!!!
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Old 05-28-2009, 12:32 PM
43,012 posts, read 89,296,520 times
Reputation: 30265
Reading thread topics like this one makes me hate people.
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Old 05-28-2009, 12:36 PM
Location: chicagoland
1,636 posts, read 3,663,769 times
Reputation: 1061
Maybe the OP should try spending some quality time with his son and the grandparents will call it even?

Money money money. What about time time time? Love love love?

Anyone can give dole out the cash. Only people capable of love can give it.

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Old 05-30-2009, 11:35 PM
Location: Highlandville
167 posts, read 388,242 times
Reputation: 67
I can understand why he hasn't reposted.
While I wasn't very impressed with the tone or content of the original post either, we don't know the whole story.

(If it were my kid, I'd be offsetting the cost for the grandparents until he graduates high school. it could also be that he wont graduate until he is 19)
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