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Old 05-29-2009, 01:38 PM
 
Location: Germany (US ARMY)
9 posts, read 7,635 times
Reputation: 21

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travels alot, too tired to interact much when home, kids don't listen to her, and just kinda wants to do her own things all the time. She works hard and gets paid well, but doesn't do much at home with the family.
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Old 05-30-2009, 06:03 AM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
403 posts, read 1,362,904 times
Reputation: 235
You are going to need to be a little more specific. What is "as much"?
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Old 05-31-2009, 01:58 PM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
475 posts, read 1,147,930 times
Reputation: 341
This is me and this is one of the reasons my husband and I have chosen not to start a family. I know I cannot be the mother children need.

Now for my answer to your question, you sit down with said mom and snap her into reality, she brought these children into this world and has a responsiblilty to care for them and to ensure they grow up well adjusted. I'm sorry she wants to do her own thing and is tired but she has kids!!! Time to tell said mom to grow up and be the mother her children need.
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Old 05-31-2009, 04:45 PM
 
266 posts, read 757,123 times
Reputation: 148
I think more info is needed for potential helpful advice. Is there a parent at home while she is out being the breadwinner? Im a stay at home mom and my husband works 24hr shifts every other day. he is obviously not home a lot however he brings home the money to support it. Im a stay at home mom there for my primary "job" is to take care of my child. When my husband comes home we end up plitting up what needs to be done. Therefore i get some free time and he gets time to bond with our baby. When this "bad mom" gets home from working is she doing things for her children and having quality bonding time?
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Old 06-01-2009, 08:52 AM
 
467 posts, read 844,864 times
Reputation: 223
As a stay-at-home Dad, I do the same thing as the Stay-at-home Mom, except I'm not as welcome in the groups the moms create, but I find ways to be social or do my own thing.

I agree there's not enough info here, but the implication is that the father is home? So the child is being cared for in that case (We kinda get fond of those little farting rugrats, too)

Anyways, if you don't feel the wife spends enough quality time, let her know. I bet she's already aware and has a hint of guilt about already. It not just the mom's duty to be the caregiver though. Daddy's are good parents too
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Old 01-03-2010, 10:34 AM
 
236 posts, read 476,906 times
Reputation: 155
We must find time for our children. No matter what position or duties we have outside of the home. Our children need us. Maybe she needs to create a schedule. You both need to sit down and talk. Bring everything to the table. I am sure those children feel neglected. Many times I came home tired. Yet, I still found time to cook, listen, laugh, and take my children out. Life must be balanced in order to be successful.
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Old 01-03-2010, 10:58 AM
 
Location: here
24,469 posts, read 28,730,432 times
Reputation: 31039
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mandy21fca View Post
travels alot, too tired to interact much when home, kids don't listen to her, and just kinda wants to do her own things all the time. She works hard and gets paid well, but doesn't do much at home with the family.
What do "you" do? Who are you? The spouse? Concerned friend? family member?
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Old 01-03-2010, 12:36 PM
 
47,576 posts, read 58,699,632 times
Reputation: 22158
Quote:
Originally Posted by rkb0305 View Post
What do "you" do? Who are you? The spouse? Concerned friend? family member?
Yes, it matters if this is just your opinion, if there is someone else home caring for the kids and so on. Sometimes a grandparent fills in, or the father or someone and the kids are fine, have a stable homelife.
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Old 01-04-2010, 10:43 AM
 
Location: beautiful NC mountains!
904 posts, read 2,534,072 times
Reputation: 1240
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mandy21fca View Post
travels alot, too tired to interact much when home, kids don't listen to her, and just kinda wants to do her own things all the time. She works hard and gets paid well, but doesn't do much at home with the family.
It sounds to me like you might be the step mother of this child? If that is true then I would suspect that you only know half the story. Remember...there are two sides to every divorce. This could be a disgruntled child who is emphasizing the negative or an ex husband that wants to constantly blame his ex.

If you think the child is being abused or neglected then you should act. If not you should consider the source.
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Old 01-04-2010, 12:43 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 88,958,716 times
Reputation: 30256
I also wonder who the OP is to this mother. The spouse?

The OP describes the typical breadwinner, but seems to think it's more unacceptable when it's the mother, not the father.
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