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Old 11-30-2009, 02:27 PM
 
Location: Orlando, FL
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I would let my son go IF I knew the person who was throwing the party and I knew their parents. I know by that age we should trust them but less than 10 years ago I was 17-18 and I remember having friends with "cool" parents and all the nonsense that went on in their homes. Most of it was harmless in the grand scheme of things but I'm sure there are lots of kids who "died" when the whole school founf out what happened at so and so's party
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Old 11-30-2009, 05:11 PM
 
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No.
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Old 12-02-2009, 10:23 AM
 
5,748 posts, read 10,502,858 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Future Trooper View Post
I'm a teenager I've been to several boy-girl parties but, tomorrow my friend is throwing a huge lavish birthday party for her 18th.It will be a huge pool themed party with lots of food and stuff to do.But to the point she is having a sleepover with boys and girls there.My mom says I can go to the party but not the sleepover.Yeah I'm a bit upset that I wont be sleeping over but I'm not going to dwell on it.I am happy that I atleast get to go!

Well anyways to the question. Would you let your son or daughter attend a boy-girl sleepover? I figured this might be a interesting topic for conversation
No; however, when my kids are grown and out on their own, they can do whatever they wish.

Quote:
Originally Posted by macjr82 View Post
So the people who would not let there kids sleep over. Would you let them go to a co-ed lock-in at the church?
Church lock-in? No, but this is not an issue in our family.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Momoftheneighborhood View Post
How about sleep overs when you have two children, a boy and a girl. The boy is the older teen and they are 2 years apart. They are all friends and hang out in a large group , some like each other but at a designated time the group is divided by gender and girls go to one room and boys to another. The parents are very on top of the sleeping situation, and the group is a very good group of teens ( no drinking ,drugs smoking etc..., all athletic and good students). Would you have a problem with this? I had this when I was growing up and my parents were very strict .
Dual sleepover for opposite gender siblings? Not on the same night. And, the whole "but they're good students!" line? Is it really necessary that I tell the story of the pregnant valedictorian? No? I didn't think so.

Last edited by formercalifornian; 12-02-2009 at 11:07 AM..
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Old 12-02-2010, 05:54 PM
 
Location: Duluth, Minnesota, USA
7,653 posts, read 14,751,095 times
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I would in no way allow my children anywhere near a co-ed sleepover, and even stronger would be my resistance to allow a "boyfriend-girlfriend sleepover". The danger of fornication would be too great.
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Old 12-02-2010, 06:02 PM
 
Location: maryland
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tvdxer View Post
I would in no way allow my children anywhere near a co-ed sleepover, and even stronger would be my resistance to allow a "boyfriend-girlfriend sleepover". The danger of fornication would be too great.

People still use the word fornication ?
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Old 12-02-2010, 06:20 PM
 
Location: In the Pearl of the Purchase, Ky
6,959 posts, read 12,375,199 times
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Wow. This page went a year between posts! tvd, it's called trust. My step daughter and her husband let their 14 yr old daughter have boy/girl sleepovers quite a bit. They call the friends' parents and let them know that it will be a boy/girl deal but will be well supervised. My son-in-law is in the Army and keeps everybody in line. They have talked plenty to my granddaughter and told them they trust her but if she wants to keep that trust she has to show it. One teenage couple tried slipping out behind the house (they have 14 acres of 4 wheeler trails). Their parents were called and told to come pick them up. And who tipped off my step daughter and son-in-law? Their 14 yr old daughter. They have had up to 10 teenagers spend the entire weekend at their place with no trouble. When Stepdaughter and SIL are ready for bed, they go to bed. But granddaughter knows dad gets up 2 or 3 times a night on no regular schedule.
If you don't force what they should or shouldn't do, but treat them with the respect you expect from anybody else, you'd be surprised how well they treat you.
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Old 12-02-2010, 06:24 PM
 
Location: maryland
3,967 posts, read 5,672,835 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kygman View Post
Wow. This page went a year between posts! tvd, it's called trust. My step daughter and her husband let their 14 yr old daughter have boy/girl sleepovers quite a bit. They call the friends' parents and let them know that it will be a boy/girl deal but will be well supervised. My son-in-law is in the Army and keeps everybody in line. They have talked plenty to my granddaughter and told them they trust her but if she wants to keep that trust she has to show it. One teenage couple tried slipping out behind the house (they have 14 acres of 4 wheeler trails). Their parents were called and told to come pick them up. And who tipped off my step daughter and son-in-law? Their 14 yr old daughter. They have had up to 10 teenagers spend the entire weekend at their place with no trouble. When Stepdaughter and SIL are ready for bed, they go to bed. But granddaughter knows dad gets up 2 or 3 times a night on no regular schedule.
If you don't force what they should or shouldn't do, but treat them with the respect you expect from anybody else, you'd be surprised how well they treat you.

Yeah...most of the time even though 14 years olds want sex...they are still too awkward around the opposite sex to really be doing much. And you are right...you should give them the trust you feel they deserve.
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Old 12-02-2010, 06:24 PM
 
Location: North Carolina
1,569 posts, read 1,995,704 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by macjr82 View Post
If there were chaperones, sure. Especially at 17/18. I f you can't trust how u raised your kid by then, how are you going to trust them when they are on their own in a matter of months?

Plus, IME, the "kids" who have the most problems own their own, are the ones who were never allowed to do anything or came from strict/shelter homes. they have no experience dealing w/ "freedom"
this
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Old 12-02-2010, 06:47 PM
 
Location: In the Pearl of the Purchase, Ky
6,959 posts, read 12,375,199 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by paganmama80 View Post
Yeah...most of the time even though 14 years olds want sex...they are still too awkward around the opposite sex to really be doing much. And you are right...you should give them the trust you feel they deserve.
Well this is one 14 year old who has told her parents it will be a long time before she even thinks about sex. For one thing she is self concious about her body. At 14 and 38D she wants to make sure the boys like ALL of her and not just certain parts. She's had 4 or 5 nice boyfriends and one bad one. One 15 year old boy tried coming up behind her and cupping his hands around her breasts. She WAS clothed! And it took him quite a while before he could stand up after she bent his fingers almost all the way back, spun around and kneed him as hard as she could in the groin. And that's before Dad got after him!
Because I know my granddaughter wears a 38D bra doesn't make me a pervert. She, her mama and Grandma drag me right along when looking for a bra in her size in a price they could afford with all the school clothes.
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Old 12-03-2010, 04:33 AM
 
Location: maryland
3,967 posts, read 5,672,835 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kygman View Post
Well this is one 14 year old who has told her parents it will be a long time before she even thinks about sex. For one thing she is self concious about her body. At 14 and 38D she wants to make sure the boys like ALL of her and not just certain parts. She's had 4 or 5 nice boyfriends and one bad one. One 15 year old boy tried coming up behind her and cupping his hands around her breasts. She WAS clothed! And it took him quite a while before he could stand up after she bent his fingers almost all the way back, spun around and kneed him as hard as she could in the groin. And that's before Dad got after him!
Because I know my granddaughter wears a 38D bra doesn't make me a pervert. She, her mama and Grandma drag me right along when looking for a bra in her size in a price they could afford with all the school clothes.
It's pretty obvious when a girl has d sized breasts grandpa so i wouldn't think you a pervert . And i like that fact she can take can of herself as well, that's good .
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