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Old 06-03-2009, 07:00 AM
 
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I hate when the kids outgrow the little kid stuff like Christmas and the Easter Bunny, that sorta stuff. Its like a part of their childhood falling away. But on the other hand, you want them to develop normally and be able to get a grip on whats real and what's just for fun.

Parenting and life are double edged swords sometimes.

We said goodbye to the Easter Bunny this year, feeling that it more for very small kids and he's 10. So we explained that the Bunny only delivers to little kids in their single digits and that his work was harder because he was on his own and didn't have a platoon of elves like Santa to help him.

Tooth Fairy I assumed was gone until a couple weeks ago when he lost on of his last baby teeth and was excited about the Fairy coming...ok awkward.

Christmas we'll keep as the last bastion of childhood and family fun. We should be able to milk another year out of it. But it is different and not as exciting as when your kids are very little and all excited about Santa coming. But at 10, he isn't wavering in his Santa beliefs and it may be hard on him when the reality dawns on him. For someone that isn't fully in touch with reality himself, he tends to take these stories and myths as very real and relates to them. Its like it becomes a part of him personally. Hard to explain.
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Old 06-03-2009, 07:29 AM
 
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I think kids hold on to Santa because they're afraid not to. By giving him up, it's giving up innocence because it's time to face the real world, and that can be harsh. It's also admitting that maybe by being more grown up, life won't be so much fun, and we won't be getting fun stuff for Christmas anymore.

My first and second believed in Santa, the toothfairy and Easter bunny. My third never has, but losing the last remnants of her childhood has not been any easier.
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Old 06-03-2009, 07:35 AM
 
Location: Penobscot Bay, the best place in Maine!
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I had three older siblings who were more than happy to burst my bubble about these things at a relatively early age, so I think I have just let my son (an only child) go with it because he can... He's 10, the Easter Bunny did come again this year, and Santa is still alive and well. He also has Asperger's, so maybe he doesn't pick up (yet) on some of the hints that maybe they aren't real, but I figure he will eventually.
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Old 06-03-2009, 07:39 AM
 
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I never believed in Santa or any of the other stuff as a kid. I have told my daughter that there is no Easter Bunny. It just seems like a strange concept and to me Easter is the most religious of all Christian holidays. We don't do baskets and all that bunny stuff. She believes in Santa, but I think halfheartedly. I wouldn't be disappointed if she knew the truth. I have a friend who never did the Santa thing, because she thought it was one big lie and didn't want to go there with her kid. I thought that was a little extreme. But to each their own.
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Old 06-03-2009, 07:50 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by deerislesmile View Post
I had three older siblings who were more than happy to burst my bubble about these things at a relatively early age, so I think I have just let my son (an only child) go with it because he can... He's 10, the Easter Bunny did come again this year, and Santa is still alive and well. He also has Asperger's, so maybe he doesn't pick up (yet) on some of the hints that maybe they aren't real, but I figure he will eventually.
Thats about where we are. His mind is like a 7-8 yr old right now, so he's still into it and doesn't listen to the kids his age telling him otherwise (not that he's around any for more than a few minutes). Its still fun for him and thats a source of joy for a kid whose angry and nervous most of the time. It may go to his preteen years before we need to clarify things with him. I mean he does need to know at some point I think.

Easter Bunny was my choice. I couldn't get into that this year. My wife talked me into letting the Tooth Fairy live on since he's almost out of baby teeth, so why not let it run its course?

I'm hoping that he's starting to figure out that costumed superheroes aren't real. But sometimes I wonder. I was hoping he'd stop wanting to wear costumes and capes when he hit about 8 or 9. Especially outdoors. I just want him to learn some self-respect. Its one thing to be eccentric and do your own thing (all for that), but its another to make a public spectacle of yourself. I don't care so much about playing make bleieve outdoors, but the dress up part is getting dated at this stage (imho)
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Old 06-03-2009, 08:09 AM
 
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My oldest is ten, and while she knows that Santa, et al are really Mom & Dad, it doesn't seem to matter for her. In fact, she loves being in on things for her younger brother, who still believes wholeheartedly. I don't think there's any harm in letting things go a little longer. Children grow up soon enough.

We've added one other tradition to our family's celebrations. The night before each family member's birthday, the "birthday fairies" sneak into the celebrant's bedroom to decorate everything with balloons, streamers, confetti, etc. It's terrific fun, and everyone enjoys his turn at being both giver and recipient.
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Old 06-03-2009, 08:32 AM
 
Location: Right where I want to be.
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We never suggested to the kids that Santa, Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy were 'real' (although they did pick up some level of belief in the Tooth Fairy from their friends--I think only because the tooth fairy that visited their friends was much more generous than ours, lol) so there was no loss of innocence in that sense. For a while DS thought Toy Story was real...that his toys had a life when he wasn't looking...of course DH and I had some fun with that notion for a while...rearranging his toys and such, lol.

Overall I enjoy watching the kids grow into real people. It's kind of like planting a garden and getting excited when the seeds sprout, and then they flower and finally fruit. As exciting as it is to see the sprouts and flowers I don't want to go back to that once we get to the fruit!! They're in the flowering stage now and I'm enjoying it. As much as I enjoyed the younger years I don't really miss them, but I'm not one to look back like that. I try to enjoy and appreciate each phase but I admit, after all these years of gardening I'm getting anxious for the fruit!!
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Old 06-03-2009, 08:50 AM
 
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Originally Posted by NCyank View Post
Overall I enjoy watching the kids grow into real people. It's kind of like planting a garden and getting excited when the seeds sprout, and then they flower and finally fruit. As exciting as it is to see the sprouts and flowers I don't want to go back to that once we get to the fruit!! They're in the flowering stage now and I'm enjoying it. As much as I enjoyed the younger years I don't really miss them, but I'm not one to look back like that. I try to enjoy and appreciate each phase but I admit, after all these years of gardening I'm getting anxious for the fruit!!
Good way to put it. I also enjoy and focus on the now stage vs the earlier stages. I'm proud of my kids and am enjoying watching them move forward.
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Old 06-03-2009, 09:20 AM
 
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Ok I guess I look back because I'm afraid of the future based on the present state of things, as such its nice to look back at a more peaceful time. Not constructive, I know. I've had old friends willing to say hi, catch up and then totally want nothing to do with me when I try to continue the dialogue. It hurts and its disappointing, partly because I expected a bigger welcome to seeing someone that was once a BFF, but I understand, those memories are a long time ago and what have sustained me for years when I was living alone and had no friends or money so in my mind I kept those people and relationships alive when those people had moved on and all but forgotten me. I see their side of it: Its because they've moved on and have a new life and I'm trying to relive the past because my present sucks. I can admit that, but not sure what to do about it.

Anyways thats my excuse. If I had something to look forward to or had more hope that things will get rosier, then I'd concentrate on the future more. Hope is about all I got right now.

Sorry, thats totally off topic.

I want my son to have a happy future and mature normally. Its not fun to watch him right now as he's stagnant and has an all but totally arrested development. It was fun when he was little seeing him learn and grow, but its just come to a crawl and he's so volatile, its like walking on eggshells, not as fun. Quite honestly its boring. He doesn't really "do" anything no matter what you try to expose him to. He's the type that would sit at a library all day and read comic books and look up stuff on the computer until they closed and kicked him out. Nor is it fun to be talked to about one topic for hours on end, no matter how much you try to switch topics. Dull for the chauffeur here, I'd rather shoot some hoops or hit the waves or something fun like that

Last edited by MrMom2; 06-03-2009 at 09:30 AM..
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Old 06-03-2009, 10:07 AM
 
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How old is your son, MrMom? I have a seven-year-old, and I swear if he doesn't stop talking about Bakugan every waking hour, my head will explode! All kids go through periods of obsession and seeming stagnation. I think they're saving up energy for the next burst of development. Hang in there.
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