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Mine have done the "bloody murder" screaming outside. We immediately called them in, explained that if they scream like that when playing, then when someone REALLY needs help, no one will respond. We told them the story of the boy who cried Wolf. Then they had to stay in for the day.
I don't think anyone expects kids NEVER to scream; again, the "bad parenting" comments refer to those parents who IGNORE this kind of thing after several iterations of it, not someone whose kid lets out a yelp because she pinched her finger in her bicycle.
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I wouldn't trust ANY parent who claims their children are without fault... Jeffrey Dahmer's mother (for example) thought her son was ALWAYS so well behaved, quiet, kept to himself, studied hard...
Yup--most parents think their own children are angels on earth, and anyone who has a gripe with them MUST be the ones at fault. The thing is, when person after person after person comments on the exact same thing, the parents need to get out of their bubble and take an objective look at the situation.
I think I can relate to the OP, and I think I know what he means.... My neighborhood has LOTS of children around, and I don't mind one bit. But, there is one child (about 12) who recently moved in across the street that constantly screams at the top of his lungs at his sister, who, in turn, occasionally screams back... This is definitely a case of the parents not doing anything about it, all of the other neighborhood children are noisy in a normal way. I am all for the kids having fun, but this one is just completely abnoxious! I am still trying to figure out a way to address this issue if it doesn't improve, but I am pretty sure it will cause bad feelings... I keep hoping someone else will address it first, so I don't have to....
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and not stereotype every parent of a loud child as having poor parenting skills.
? I haven't seen anyone do that.
And I wonder: how can someone be so mindless, thoughtless and generally inept as parents - and people - as to consider this kind of behavior acceptable?
You said it in your opening post.
I did not say "every parent of a loud child as having poor parenting skills" or even imply it. This has been explained and clarified by many people here numerous times as to what is meant.
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Originally Posted by sskkc
Mine have done the "bloody murder" screaming outside. We immediately called them in, explained that if they scream like that when playing, then when someone REALLY needs help, no one will respond. We told them the story of the boy who cried Wolf. Then they had to stay in for the day.
It's happened probably 3x in the past 9 years. So, I'm a horrible parent, right?
Yes that's what we're saying.
PS I'm not sure I buy "most" people thinking their kids are perfect angels, but there are more than a few....and a growing and disturbingly large % that are painfully slow to consider the fault being their kid's. When we were kids, if our teacher thought we were bad enough to call the parents in, man we were in for it lol - but nowdays many parents automatically assume the teacher is wrong or lying or somehow is at fault.
I found this site because I am looking for a solution for my 2nd baby who is now 9 months old and just screams for no reason, not crying or upset just screaming, I am well aware it is upsetting to old fuddy duddys when in family restaurants and have people glare at me and make comments but I do not know what the answer is... other then never take the baby out??? he don’t understand "no" yet, nor does he understand a smack, shouting back is not going to work and have you ever tried to reason with an 8/9 month old? I would not mind if I were in the Ritz but Zizzis and Asda???? please so any advice would be great!!
I found this site because I am looking for a solution for my 2nd baby who is now 9 months old and just screams for no reason, not crying or upset just screaming, I am well aware it is upsetting to old fuddy duddys when in family restaurants and have people glare at me and make comments but I do not know what the answer is... other then never take the baby out??? he don’t understand "no" yet, nor does he understand a smack, shouting back is not going to work and have you ever tried to reason with an 8/9 month old? I would not mind if I were in the Ritz but Zizzis and Asda???? please so any advice would be great!!
You should create a new thread. Your issue is different from the one in this thread since yours is about babies.
You'll get a better response if you start a new thread where people are more likely to see and respond to your post.
I found this site because I am looking for a solution for my 2nd baby who is now 9 months old and just screams for no reason, not crying or upset just screaming, I am well aware it is upsetting to old fuddy duddys when in family restaurants and have people glare at me and make comments but I do not know what the answer is... other then never take the baby out??? he don’t understand "no" yet, nor does he understand a smack, shouting back is not going to work and have you ever tried to reason with an 8/9 month old? I would not mind if I were in the Ritz but Zizzis and Asda???? please so any advice would be great!!
I was that baby, many, many years ago, who screamed for "no reason". Turns out my clothing was making me itch. Seriously. My mother, bless her, was dressing me up in all these cute little togs that were slowly driving me insane.
Nobody had a clue until I was old enough to tell them I itched all the time. And they found an allergist who said, "She's right. You'ld scream too if you itched all the time."
I can remember the misery of itching. Luckily, I've blocked the screaming from memory. Wash everything before you let your child wear it. (This used to be called "getting the sizing out".) Check for lace, ribbons, ric-rac that is rubbing on his skin. Wool, cashmere, all those lovely materials? Out! Think simple cottons. Plain designs.
Not every kid out there screaming his head off is doing it because his clothing is driving him insane. But for those who are... I'm on a personal crusade.
Can't help but wonder how common this is, ie was my luck bad re this neighborhood, or is it some "thing" popular in this area or (as I suspect) even worse, ie a nation-wide lunacy...also hoping someone can remind me I'm not the only one left who gets how obnoxious and asinine this behavior is. (PS NOTE AND DISCLAIMER to people, esp parents, who consider this behavior acceptable: this is not aimed personally at anyone, so pls keep that in mind. Maybe such a person is a great parent overall, but the light just hasn't come on regarding this topic - or whatever. Point being I am talking in general terms. If you can't accept or even grasp that and discuss rationally, pls move on. TIA.).
It's bad enough in restaurants, church ad nauseum, but even when I'm out working in the yard, it's not exactly rare to hear some kid scream, and I do mean SCREAM as if someone was ripping their arms out of their sockets.
And I wonder: how can someone be so mindless, thoughtless and generally inept as parents - and people - as to consider this kind of behavior acceptable? Are they so self-centered that they just don't give a flying flip? Or are they so incredibly clueless they actually don't get how rude this is? Either way, it's absolutely amazing to me that such people exist.....and, more to the point, apparently breeding like cockroaches. ie have you found this common in your area as well? Or is my area an aberration?
Oh I am so there with you...I feel better now, knowing I'm not alone! I have noticed this with a few families in my new neighborhood. Not many kids in my old one, which I'm starting to see was a blessing I really think it's the parental units fault!! I understand kids need to be kids, but to not take notice and redirect blood curdling random screaming fits?? Have they not heard of quiet voice? Nope it's like they are encouraged to just be themselves no matter what rude and obnoxious behavior results. One of these kids dad is a screamer as well though, so the apple don't fall far from the screaming tree
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I really think it's the parental units fault!! I understand kids need to be kids, but to not take notice and redirect blood curdling random screaming fits?? Have they not heard of quiet voice? Nope it's like they are encouraged to just be themselves no matter what rude and obnoxious behavior results. One of these kids dad is a screamer as well though, so the apple don't fall far from the screaming tree
