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I would like to know, since there are actually posters suggesting not to do the grocery shopping with children. How many of you actually have the luxury of NOT bringing your children with you shopping? My husband works about 75 hours a week.... and running in and out on the weekends with other things. I am just wondering if this is seriously an option for the majority of you.... if so I am very jealous......
Oh c'mon skbs, you are supposed to pay an adult, cpr certified babysitter $15/hr to watch the kids while you grocery shop, dontcha know?
I'm there with you. It gets easier as they get older, but never as easy as when they are old enough to stay home or when you can leave them at home with your spouse.
I understand that sometimes there is no food at home, no-one to watch child and you just have to get the shopping done because this is the only time slot available. I grumble when I see hobby shoppers just kinda strollin' along with their own band. That is not a "Have To" situation...it's a "Want To and **** you, too" thing.
I always brought the diaper bag (backpack) and stuff in the diaper bag to try and occupy Sweet Pea...doodle pads, etch-a-sketch, some other age-appropriate BUSY ME thing. Cheerios, Gold Fish and spill-proof water were right there, too.
She also likes to help do the shopping...unbreakables...will pick out cans or boxes, carefully.
But she gets tired, too...we had one episode in a Home Depot or Lowes...but since both husband and I were there, we split up and I took her outside. If I had been unable to work it that way I would have tried asking her to Eye-Spy with me...we need this - can you see it? Which one should we get? Not working? Home, James.
Another time, we went to a Japanese Hibachi Grill with a group of friends...her first exposure to this particular culinary delight. The pre-cooking flame scared her, now we know she has serious issues with unconfined fire. Phobia. Not just a little thing. She began to cry uncontrollably and I told husband we may have to leave. Period. I took her out to the entrance and then outside...and talked to her. Explained what was going on and listened to her as she struggled to put in to words what had her so freaked out.
I might have been gone 20 minutes.
Yeah, my tasty Filet got cold....but my daughter needed the chance to recoup.
We returned when the cook was done flaming the grill at our table. Then when another table next to us had someone working it, she and I would huddle or husband would take turns with me walking her over to the fish tank - she just didn't want to see it. Then she was fine.
BTW, she wants to go back, said the food was yummy (it was, even cold) but wants to sit on the side where there are no grills. No large, scary flames. For her, gladly.
Its not a public area, its someone's property and business and the store has every right to ask you to leave the premises, esp if they get the idea your making them lose any business.
If you refuse to leave, they can have the police remove you and trespassing and/or public disturbance charges could be brought, although unlikely.
Shopping centers like Walmart are IMO public places... How many people have actually abandoned their carts while they were shopping because of someone else's screaming kids and gone home???? I do not have the time or energy to quit shopping half way and return.
What may be irritating to you may not be irritating to me and vice versa. Parents dealing with a melt down don't need other people's criticism...unless of course their child takes to throwing stuff on passers by, it's no different than an obnoxious person talking loudly on their cell phone... and inconveneince ..but you deal with it and move on....
Restruants are a diff story altogether...People are paying in part for ambience..so I have taken turns with my husband at eating out..no fun, but hey... Grocery shopping...C'mon...those check out aisles are begging for tamtrums with the stocks of candy
Shopping centers like Walmart are IMO public places... How many people have actually abandoned their carts while they were shopping because of someone else's screaming kids and gone home???? I do not have the time or energy to quit shopping half way and return.
What may be irritating to you may not be irritating to me and vice versa. Parents dealing with a melt down don't need other people's criticism...unless of course their child takes to throwing stuff on passers by, it's no different than an obnoxious person talking loudly on their cell phone... and inconveneince ..but you deal with it and move on....
Restruants are a diff story altogether...People are paying in part for ambience..so I have taken turns with my husband at eating out..no fun, but hey... Grocery shopping...C'mon...those check out aisles are begging for tamtrums with the stocks of candy
In a court of law, then "Legally" its private property owned by someone whose paying rent and property taxes to have their establishment there. You don't have a right to be there. They let you be there because they want your business (ie money).
Public would be a government operated park or beach or even a library. Even then you can be asked to leave by the powers that be.
We called this scenario "The Great Ruby Red Slippers Meltdown" in our house. When my daughter was around 7-8 years old, she saw sparkly red sequinned shoes on sale at a Target store and decided she HAD to have them. I told her no, we were there to pick out shoes for church, and those were not appropriate. She threw herself on the floor, flailed, screamed, begged... it was not a pretty sight. Until that time, her father (my ex) would automatically give in or take her out of the store immediately. That day, I decided to end it. I told her she was embarassing herself and stepped over her and went about my shopping a couple aisles over. After about another minute, she quit, came over whimpering and picked out appropriate shoes. She also apologized to the lady working in the shoe department.
As an observer, I just give a little "Been there, done that" head nod to the poor parents having to endure it and think nothing bad about them. I have found that with my kids, if we just whisk them away, it makes them realize "Hey! The next time I don't want to be here, I will just throw a fit and they will let me leave." But, we also DO NOT take our toddlers into a sit-down restaurant. EVER! A trip to a restaurant without a drive-up window is like a coming-of-age ritual in our home.
I would like to know, since there are actually posters suggesting not to do the grocery shopping with children. How many of you actually have the luxury of NOT bringing your children with you shopping? My husband works about 75 hours a week.... and running in and out on the weekends with other things. I am just wondering if this is seriously an option for the majority of you.... if so I am very jealous......
I go either very early Sat or Sun am...6am until about 8am. Our grocery store is 24 hours which is next to the close out store that opens at 7am. When I get home,everyone is just getting up,etc. My husband is gone b/w 9-10am M-F & gets home around 11:30pm M-F.
When #2 was a newborn, my parents would watch my children once a week so I could go shopping. I was nursing & my dh was working OT & not getting home until about 2-3am, so there was no way I was expecting his help early Sat/Sun am. For quite some time, he was also working Saturdays.
I've found that going shopping once a week & very early keeps me on budget, I meal plan better, I move quicker & there are no crowds.
When it was just #1 & my family lived about 1200 miles away & my dh was deployed...#1 was my sidekick. I think since there was no option for him from day 1, he just learned to adjust & it became part of his temperment.
I appreciate very much the fact that I am able to shop kid-free. I have no problems taking them, it's just a lot easier right now with their ages to go kid free. My dh doesn't mind waking up in the am with them b/c he does not see them that much during the week & they have established a nice morning routine that my older one waits for all week long.
More on the restaurants...yes - there have been many times I declined an invitation because it was an adult environment (Steak House, Sushi, whatever) and not a 'family-style' eatery. If there's a bar and/or dessert tray, I was fairly certain it would be a no-go.
My daughter didn't really act out in public, I'm only counting two times in almost five years...she wasn't that kind of kid...but she would get tired or bored.
Our dinners 'out' were Panera Bread or anything else with outside dining. Bistro = good. Just in case.
As daughter got older, we tried one particular Japanese restaurant that loved small children...the owner would come over and fuss...so really, I mean loved small children. She'd bring extra tofu, on the house.
Another large, loud Mexican restaurant with booths, extremely casual...good kid stuff.
But hands-down, the favorite - her favorite, is Cracker Barrell...and she has from day one behaved so well in there that she gets compliments. We just watch the time...
P.S. I know those shoes, too...if they'd been pink, my daughter would have noticed. But she's good about not buying stuff...it's actually strange - she does not - ever- throw a fit if we explain that we can't.
In a court of law, then "Legally" its private property owned by someone whose paying rent and property taxes to have their establishment there. You don't have a right to be there. They let you be there because they want your business (ie money).
Public would be a government operated park or beach or even a library. Even then you can be asked to leave by the powers that be.
But according to that reasoning, a screaming child has every right to be in a store as long as management allows it. If you are in someone else's home and don't like the other guests, you should leave, not insist that the host kick them out. The offending "guest" is not trespassing unless management says so. I believe this disucssion is about ethical or social responsibilities to leave, not legal ones.
I'm not a fan of screamers, just pointing out the issues I see.
I go either very early Sat or Sun am...6am until about 8am.
My favorite time to shop! Our grocery store has a Starbucks in it - so I even get to drink my coffee undisturbed. That is one of the perks of having my husband in town - shopping all by myself and drinking a coffee early on a weekend morning.
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