Manners and Social Skills should not be taught in school (School is for reading, writing and arithmetic ) (activities, son)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I also agree but parents do not teach those things...maybe how to balance a checkbook, but no one teaches their kids how credit works, how to bank, social networking.
I think you are way off base with this statement. My spouse and I are teaching our children all of those things and more. We often talk to them about money management, and we set up both banking and investment accounts for them when they were very young. Our ten-year-old is even learning the basics of tracking the stock market this summer. I'd like to believe that we are exceptional parents, but I doubt that's true. Furthermore, most schools do teach financial management, even in the elementary years. It's part of the civics requirement.
Now, as far as the ASVAB, that's an interesting idea in that it's the only extant national high school exam. Its weakness is that its intention is to uncover aptitude rather than measure accomplishment. The ASVAB is an entrance exam with the very specific purpose of determining appropriate placement for military service, rather than a general academic exit exam like the UK's O levels.
But, back to the subject at hand, I don't have any qualms with schools taking time to teach the basics of civility. Several years ago, teacher of the year Ron Clark wrote a book based on 55 rules of etiquette for elementary school students. It was a fantastic success. My daughter's fourth grade teacher used the book in her classroom, discussing each of the tenets in turn throughout the year. Her students were by no means poorly behaved at the beginning of fourth grade, but even so I noticed that as the months passed and the discussion progressed, their decorum improved.
Last edited by formercalifornian; 06-19-2009 at 09:22 AM..
Yes some of those things I suggested are taught but are electives and not required...I think networking should be a class in school as well.
Another thing I think is bull is test and exams that are closed book and no note test. When in life do you not have a chance to research something before answering? Every real world experiance that would be asked of someone where it is not common knowledge is allowed to be looked up and gotten back to. In my business and marketing class the tests are all open material...if you brought a laptop...you can you it. if you have internet on it you can use it. Bring your books, notes and a laptop. The key is you cannot answer all the questions in the time allowed if you reaserch everything. So you do have to study, but the if the info is out there than they should be able to use it.
Another thing I think is bull is test and exams that are closed book and no note test. When in life do you not have a chance to research something before answering?
I believe there are some things you just have to know without having to look them up. For example, I would not want my doctor looking everything up just to give me simple answers- conversely, I also want my doctor to know how to research for answers he/she does not have. There is a time/place for both kinds of testing, IMO.
A relative of mine teaches Kindergarten and First Grade and has been getting alot of flak from the parents when she attempts to teach kids social skills, manners and etiquette. The parents complain to the Principal and state: Manners and Social Skills should not be taught in school (School is for reading, writing and arithmetic!!!)
What do you think is the role of teachers and schools at the elementary level in teaching kids about things like socializing, sharing, manners, and general life skills? The teachers tell me that these are not being taught in the homes and so the school has to be brought in. The parents say that hard skills should be taught instead. It is something like the controversy over sex education.
What do you think as a parent?
School is about much more than the three Rs. My kids' preschool had a family style lunch, where they served themselves, passed around bowls of food, used napkins on their laps. It wasn't Miss Manners, but it taught them common social skills. This was a state preschool.
Many public schools (and private, I am sure) today don't even have soap in the restrooms, let alone encourage them to wash their hands before meals.
I would welcome any teacher who brought basic social skills into the classroom. My kids can shovel the food in with the best of them, but could also sit at a formal dinner and know which fork to use. It is important, IMO and, while should not take the place of book learning, is not something to be complained about. I would welcome it.
School is about much more than the three Rs. My kids' preschool had a family style lunch, where they served themselves, passed around bowls of food, used napkins on their laps. It wasn't Miss Manners, but it taught them common social skills. This was a state preschool.
Many public schools (and private, I am sure) today don't even have soap in the restrooms, let alone encourage them to wash their hands before meals.
I would welcome any teacher who brought basic social skills into the classroom. My kids can shovel the food in with the best of them, but could also sit at a formal dinner and know which fork to use. It is important, IMO and, while should not take the place of book learning, is not something to be complained about. I would welcome it.
But as kids don't have dinner at school, that wouldn't really be in the school's realm of influence. Plus encouraging the kids to use soap is good, but some kids allergic to certain chemicals, etc. So sometimes its best to let the parents handle that too from home and hope that lesson is just brought into the real world with them.
To some extent, it's probably necessary. Particularly for those children who aren't being taught those things at home, but also because they spend hours at school, and need to be reminded to use those manners. What was the term? In loco parentis?
Even though I do agree, teaching them something because its not taught at home implies your overriding what the parents are doing or that what the parents are doing is wrong in your opinion and that your way is better.
Your superceding your own values over that kid's family's values because you feel yours is better. Have to be careful about that.
I do agree though, but sometimes that just isn't something an outsider needs to step into unless its truly harmful to others in which case you may bring the parents into it.
If by the age of 5-6ish kids haven't learned some social skills, manners in the home before they start school, thats sad. To expect the schools to teach kids there manners as well? Some social skills are learned by interacting with there piers, but manners, please.
We don't know everyone's situation. Its hard to teach an only child how to have manners with other kids when there's no other kids in your household to use for examples or when the child has no friends outside of school that live nearby. When its just mom, dad and Junior, some things are a challenge to teach (if they even occur to the parents). Parents sometimes forget or are unaware of every little thing they go thru in school that should be addressed since they don't see it for themselves or experience those situations at home ever.
I see what you mean, but try to remember that not everyone falls from one mold.
In many schools social skills are taught for special ed. students.
For children with conditions like ASperger Syndrome, the simple act of interacting with a group is way beyond them. Therefore, it must be broken into small steps or 'proper group behavior' has to be modeled and taught.
The OP has so many friends and relatives in so many interesting and thought provoking situations. He/she/it never wants for 'another thrilling topic.'
I just wish the schools didn't resort to sending the boy home when they decided he was out of control. I wish they could take the time to handle it and force him to deal with a social situation rather than just send him into the solitude of going home and not really learning how to handle the situation properly. Its also inconvenient for the parent that has to not work and just sit at home on stand-by waiting for "the call" to come get him again.
Manners and etiquette are taught at my daughter's private school. They even teach foreign etiquette in her foreign language classes. I see nothing wrong with it, a child can only grow from this knowledge and I can't understand why anyone would have issues with it.
With so many schools underfunded and teaching to better their 'test' grades to recieve better funding next year, I would say it is very hard for any school to even teach basic courses. Some how most parents leave the ALL the teaching to the schools.
How many parents think it is easier or cool to live in a 'jerry springer' world of behavior then an "Oprah" world.
Kids today are NOT taught basic social skills they get most of them from TV and TV is a poor teacher after the Sesame Street years. To many kids think it is beneath them to flip a hamburger to make money for flipping burgers wont but those $200 shoes or that $500 phone or gaming system they have to have.
Still If they don't get good social behavior lessons someplace they might as well incorporate it into school lessons early. Maybe then they might be better at social interactions, speak more clearly and behave in a more polite manner to others on a day to day interaction.
Another topic previously mentioned was learning or knowing how to navigate monetary issues. Well all I can really say is if they don't learn that at school then I doubt they will ever learn. A few parents might take up that teaching but from personal experience very very few know how the system works themselves let alone teach thier child.
Many a day I have to explain to customers how a purchase is accomplished on thier card for they have no clue that to place orders and cancel orders can mess up their credit limits. Many have no clue as to when thier closing date is on the account and ask ME if today's purchase will be on this months bill or the next. HOW should I know!??? Dealing with people everday all day who do not understand the basics of credit purchasing leaves me to honestly beleive that it should be a course in High School just on that one issue alone. Maybe just one whole semister.
I also wish they could put Drivers Ed back in School. When living in Italy I learned that their kids have to have a full years worth of classes before getting thier license.
The over all end is that basic Manners, general etiquette and knowledge are key to positive social interactions on many levels of life. Sure I don't use my knowledge of History, Social Science, Science or even leather tooling on my day job. But situations do come up in life when knowing some of the information is greatly helpful. People turn to you when you know information or at least how to find it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.