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at 18mos, my son will attempt to use a fork or spoon, but definitely makes a huge mess AND sometimes wants to just pick up the food when a few jabs don't get it on the fork. Some spoons specially curved for young kids I think work b/c you'll notice how kids move the spoon from bowl to mouth- a skill that takes a while to really control. They more bend there elbow, but keep the spoon in one place. Anyway, I think no rush- they'll get it. Pick the food wisely, too, like whipped yogurt or oatmeal - stuff that sticks to a spoon- is easier..
I just thought she was supposed to be doing it by now and I wasn't working at it enough. But it seems from your answers I am and there is no average age to master it.
I picked up some Gerber spoons and Fork. It's for beginners and looks fairly easy to use. I tried the oatmeal this morning (along with ever week for the last month,lol) and she still looooves to grab it with her hand. I think she gets more!