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My daughter(17) is on a mission trip and her BF(18) (will be a Senior in HS) and I are going to pick her up- and my daughter and her BF (mostly him-she hasn't asked but i haven't really been able to talk to her)are wanting to stay in same room-I told them no but I know the story I will get- if we can lay on the sofa and watch movies all night what is the difference? I've already pulled the I know what happens in bed etc..they are madly in awe /love/ infatuated with each other- what would you say!!I believe they have done IT already - and have threatened them that they need to wait etc but they are growing up- just have a hard time allowing this under my roof- we will be in my parents mtn house!! what would you do?
I'd have to say no also, if it were my house. Whether they have done it or not should make no difference, it's a matter of principle. Lying on a couch watching movies in a common room where anyone is free to come and go is a little bit different then being in her room alone under covers, no lights, and no one up.
She doesn't have to like your justification, just remember that. I think sometimes we get caught up in trying to over-explain our decisions in order to make our kids happier with them. Sometimes they are not going to like decisions we make and no amount of explaining is going to make them feel any better about it. Like I said they don't have to like it, they just have to abide by it.
My daughter(17) is on a mission trip and her BF(18) (will be a Senior in HS) and I are going to pick her up- and my daughter and her BF (mostly him-she hasn't asked but i haven't really been able to talk to her)are wanting to stay in same room-I told them no but I know the story I will get- if we can lay on the sofa and watch movies all night what is the difference? I've already pulled the I know what happens in bed etc..they are madly in awe /love/ infatuated with each other- what would you say!!I believe they have done IT already - and have threatened them that they need to wait etc but they are growing up- just have a hard time allowing this under my roof- we will be in my parents mtn house!! what would you do?
ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!!!! Not in MY HOUSE, UNDER MY ROOF, WITH MY PRESENCE THERE
I'd have to say no also, if it were my house. Whether they have done it or not should make no difference, it's a matter of principle. Lying on a couch watching movies in a common room where anyone is free to come and go is a little bit different then being in her room alone under covers, no lights, and no one up.
She doesn't have to like your justification, just remember that. I think sometimes we get caught up in trying to over-explain our decisions in order to make our kids happier with them. Sometimes they are not going to like decisions we make and no amount of explaining is going to make them feel any better about it. Like I said they don't have to like it, they just have to abide by it.
Stick to your guns. When she complains, let her know that soon enough she will be living in her own house/apartment and then she gets all the freedom she wants, but until then: no boys in her room!
Absolutely not and I would put an end to cuddling under a blanket while watching movies. I was once a teenager and I know what we were doing under the blanket--yes, while people were near. A blanket covers a lot.
just got a text from my daughter and I told her what the BF was saying and she said he is just kidding- I am not 100% I believe her but I told her that we have rules and we follow them or the BF does not come over etc and she knows this and knows better- I really thought he was kidding but he kept texting me about it etc....He really is a good kid and I really like him and his family- thanks for your input-
He can be kidding all he wants... basically he is lying to get her in that situation. If they have, she is lying and if they haven't and he is saying they have, he is lying. Someone better come clean or they wouldn't be together at my house. No, No, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
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