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OMG... I hate being tickled, so I NEVER tickle kids. I have seen people tickle kids and they get this freaky evil look on their face - total torture, if you ask me.
I have always hated being tickled. My aunt used to chase me around the house until I locked myself in the bathroom. I honestly think she thought we were having fun.
As a teenager, a boy at school wanted to tickle me. He grabbed me and did so and I yelled, "If you don't stop, I'll hurt you!" He didn't stop. He got hurt. I don't have control over it, I am so frantic to get away from it. It's painful to me.
Tickling is fine for very brief moments. I'm talking 3 seconds or less, and no more than one repeat. I consider the only real value of it to be getting whoever you're tickling to smile. It's actually scientific:
1. Smiling even when you don't feel like it at first can produce feelings of happiness.
2. The physiological act of tensing up (which is what tickling does to a person) amounts to stress which, ironically, can make it harder for a person to feel happy that moment and even later on.
I have seen many posts like mine but I'll just chime in. My (single) dad was almost obsessive about making sure that his two girls knew thier personal space and could tell anyone "no" or "stop" at any time. He explained to us that we never had to give kisses or hugs (even to grandma) if we didn't want to and we always had a right to privacy and space from him or anyone else. That said, tickling was a good practice because he would joke or gesture towards our tummies, necks, feet and make us laugh but ALWAYS stopped immediately when asked and even checked in (when we were laughing to hard to talk) to see if we were still having fun. This worked in the opposite way of what some have expressed as it helped us learn that we ARE in control of our own bodies.
When our daughter became a toddler my husband began tickling what I considered harshly and I told him that it was very important to respect her and always look for signs that she was ready to stop. He said he never thought of it that way but agreed. I think when you do it respectfully it can be positive :-)
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