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Unread 04-18-2007, 09:32 AM
 
Location: Long Beach, CA
2,074 posts, read 7,673,202 times
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When is the best to have a baby? I would say when the head is crowning and your contractions are one minute apart. <LOL> Sorry, I'm in a silly mood this morning

Paula
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Unread 04-18-2007, 09:33 AM
 
Location: STL
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paula Lynn View Post
When is the best to have a baby? I would say when the head is crowning and your contractions are one minute apart. <LOL> Sorry, I'm in a silly mood this morning

Paula
That's ok.. I was going to say Spring, because then you won't have to be all huge and pregnant in the hot summer months.
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Unread 04-18-2007, 10:20 AM
 
Location: Naptowne, Alaska
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Paula Lynn that is good! I think spring would be best for the mother also.
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Unread 04-18-2007, 10:28 AM
 
Location: Sacramento, CA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stellar9 View Post
While you can get pregnant right off the pill, it often takes as long as 6 months for your body to get back to normal. The pill can reduce later fertility as well, especially if you've been on it a long time. Endometriosis can also make it difficult to conceive. On the other hand, pregnancy often helps heal mild endo. Because your mom had it, you probably have a higher chance of having it. The pill can mask the symptoms; did you have really painful periods before you started the pill?

Hope that helps.
I still have painful periods when on the pill. I am really starting to get worried now...

Here is the biggest concern--medical insurance. I have crappy medical insurance through my university. Once I graudate, it goes away. I should be graduating this December. My husband works for his father and has insurance through his business, and he refuses to cover me (even though we have offered to pay whatever additional fees he is charged). He says it will screw up his taxes. So, hubby is going through sonography (ultrasound) school right now and will graduate in September. His new career is in high demand, so hopefully I will get insurance through him soon (he will be graduating before me).
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Unread 04-18-2007, 02:09 PM
 
Location: Missouri
5,717 posts, read 13,271,802 times
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Honestly, if I were in your shoes, I would also wait until I had good medical insurance. Having a baby is expensive! And once the baby is born, he or she will need insurance too. In the meantime, keep practicing the "making the baby" aspect of things.
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Unread 04-19-2007, 08:44 PM
 
926 posts, read 950,185 times
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From a male point of view, I think it has to be a total agreement and desire to have the child to be successful parents. My daughter is a single parent and the father of my grandchild is not supportive, either financially or emotionally. I will say very tactfully that I am not very fond of this sorry excuse of a human being.

Not to sway from the topic, but I passed a kidney stone a year ago and I've always heard that this is as close to experiencing childbirth as a man will ever know. Actually, what I passed was a 16 pound boulder with barbs. I never saw it because of the tears in my eyes, but I'm fairly certain it was that size.
That being said, I would like to proclaim that IF that feeling is like experiencing childbirth, I have even more respect and admiration for all mothers and also, the next time I give birth to a kidney boulder, I'd like C-Section, please
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Unread 04-19-2007, 09:01 PM
 
Location: Jackson Heights, NY
71 posts, read 267,781 times
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For those who are "waiting" etc. I am a single woman, in her early 40s. My doctor said, with help [in my case] I can have a healthy, biological child. Mind you, I have one ovary and a tilted uterus; it would take work.

To LeavinCA, I, too, am an only child and yeah, you are right, it was lonely. Thus, I would say two at the very least. Nevertheless, from all my friends who are married and have children [giving birth at every age 18 to 44] . . . there is never enough money . . . yes, children change a marriage; but you just grow and change with the situation . . . five years is not too bad, giving you a chance to be with your husband . . . then, do it, conceive and have a child.

If, for any reason, including all the posters in their 40s who are having trouble getting pregnant. I have a question for you. Is it vitally important that the child is biologically related to you? And secondly, if the answser is "yes" . . . Why? (You don't have to answer, I am just curious.)

I have chosen NOT to become pregnant, even if I can, because I feel the world is full of beautiful, loving children or are already born or about to be born who need and want a "forever Mommy" -- and God made me to do that for a couple of them or so. I am going to adopt my children. They will be "my children" as God will bring them to me, to adopt, when it is time; and this, to me, means the child was born to be mine. Yes, these children will be born to other women; but, via the natural order of things in God's world, these children will be raised by me as their "Mommy".
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Unread 04-20-2007, 07:32 AM
 
6 posts, read 10,605 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by christina0001 View Post
Honestly, if I were in your shoes, I would also wait until I had good medical insurance. Having a baby is expensive!
I think this is a really important point. My second child was born with medical complications (she's totally fine now) and the bills I saw Over $40,000.

Good luck with your decision. My husband and I were married for many years before we had children and we made some nice "couple" memories during that time.
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Unread 04-20-2007, 12:32 PM
 
2,971 posts, read 5,263,729 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AngelAura28 View Post

If, for any reason, including all the posters in their 40s who are having trouble getting pregnant. I have a question for you. Is it vitally important that the child is biologically related to you? And secondly, if the answser is "yes" . . . Why? (You don't have to answer, I am just curious.)
No...the biological link was important at one time, but it's no longer. I had to go through a mourning period over that loss.

We had always talked about wanting to adopt after having a bio child.

However, adoption isn't a walk in the park either. Both foreign and private US adoptions are costly (starting around $25k on up).

Many countries have tightened their restrictions. We were about to embark on China adoption but suddenly last April, China closed all adoptions to parents in wheelchairs (my husband has MS & is in a wheelchair). Never mind that he is our bread-winner, of sound mind, drives, etc...Because his legs don't work, he's not "fit" to be a parent.

This process (foreign adoptions, in particular) can take years, too. You'd never know it by seeing the celebs who are adopting. But I have a cousin & friends who have been in process now for almost 3 yrs - waiting.

We've started domestic county adoption twice (once we had to cancel because I got pregnant but m/c'd) but we have concerns about so many children who are born with FAS and other addictions. We have friends who adopted babies with those addictions and life for them is a nightmare.

We are in the process of starting private adoption & we'll see where that takes us!

I think adoption is a wonderful choice IF you can make that choice comfortably and with all the right intentions (to provide a loving home & loving parent/s for a child/ren). It's not for everyone nor is being CF for everyone either.

As to the matter of insurance - I DO think that's important to have before starting a family. Ultra-sounds, blood work, office visits, the hospital stay in an uncomplicated pregnancy are very expensive w/out coverage.

Last edited by Sampaguita; 04-20-2007 at 12:40 PM..
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Unread 04-20-2007, 01:27 PM
 
Location: Happiness is found inside your smile :)
3,177 posts, read 9,331,951 times
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I had my child (unplanned) at 29, and I love him - he's great. But MAN it changes a relationship...you never ever get the old relationship back - you must mature and change together.

Truly I wish I had waited even longer - I hardly feel ready at 34 (preg with my second, planned)

Actually - honestly, had I not had the accidental pregnancy - I would have been happy being child-less. I was actually trying to make this decision , while we were living in Italy I found myself pregnant (Well, it is the Land of Love)

But he is my world now and I love him here. I work through my depression of losing my old life, so be very careful that you are both on the same page. YOu don't want to ever wish you could have your old life back - because it's a wish that will never come true.
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