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My way of dealing with the situation would be to address the young woman directly, which I consider a form of "adult to adult" conversation. I do not consider it parenting. You obviously see things differently.
The "young woman" in question is likely 16-17 according to the OP. Not an "adult" in any sense of the word.
You stated you would, quote "I would express concern to the young lady about her choices and the risks of hosting parties that involve underage drinking"
How that discussion with a 16 - 17 yo by an adult other than the childs parent can be considered anything other than "parenting" is beyond me. That discussion you would have is the responsibility of the parents, not you.
The rational course of action for any responsible adult in this situation is to let the parents know what happened.
Why do some folks here have reservations about an "adult to adult" conversation letting another parent know what is going on yet have no trouble telling that same adult to go ahead and "parent" another child
Savor the irony.
I like the option of telling the kid to "fess - up" or else. It gives her the opportunity to do the right thing, and lets her know that she's being watched.
Let's face it: We were all teenagers once, and we should remember what typically happens at a local kegger. Hmmm....let me see, destruction, petty theft, heavy petting/other things that shall remained unnamed...the "happy drunk" the "angry drunk" the stupid kid that decides he can drive.
How about the one that passes out and only in the morning when everyone sobers up is discovered having choked to death on his or her own vomit? It happens more than many parents care to think it does.
Reality check! Let's be real about teenagers and alcohol.
Not your business. Leave it be or you may find your house is the one getting egged, BB-gunned, vandalized, et cetera.
Then you can live with the death of one of the attendees that dies from alcohol poisoning, or stupidity while drunk on your conscience for the rest of your life, assuming you have a conscience.
The concept of "it takes a village to raise a child" is not just a saying, it is a truth, and a huge part of what is wrong with our society today is that it is no longer recognized or practiced in this country.
Well, not much to report here. Unfortunately, I think there is more going on than I know. I have rarely seen Mom lately, except for one Sat. morning for an early lawn mow that she was taking care of.
Lately, when Dad comes over (they are divorced) I notice that the Mom and Daughter's cars both leave, leaving the son alone to socialize with Dad, usually basketball in the driveway if it is not too hot.
I swear we are not too nosy, we just notice these things as we are in and out of the house - by these things I mean if our neighbors cars are in the driveway or if the neighbors are out of the house etc.
Anyway, I did not have a chance to "mention" anything to Mom or Daughter. Daughter would usually be washing her car in the driveway at least once every week and a half and now she is not even doing that.
Not to mention both of them leaving when Dad comes over.
Yes you should. I think the response will be hostile or uncaring, but you will be helping the neighborhood kids.
With someone like this living in the neighborhood, It is time for you to organize a pro active teen support group for the kids in the neighborhood. If you don't want to get involved you unfortunately will be as guilty as them and may pay with the furture of your own childeren.
god forbid SNITCHIN could potentially save a life...in the good ole days it was called caring..parents in general had each others back....an oldie but goodie- better safe than sorry.
OP if it were me I'd keep an eye out. My neighbors went out of town last week and asked me to keep an eye out over there, as their adult kids were gonna come house sit and might have a party...and if they did and it got loud or anyone acting stupid outside, I had MOM privelages didn't have to use'em though
Our neighbor is on summer break and will be a SR. in HS in the Fall.
Mom was out of town for a few days, on one of those evenings about 20 kids parked far down the street and all walked up to her home. There was a keg...
Anyway, we called the non-emergence police number but the kids all left before the police came . Perhaps they were dropping off the keg for the next evening or perhaps they were kicked out of another party.
Do I mention to our neighbor that this happened?
When I read the thread title my natural reaction was to say: Just call the police. But you did that....and they didn't make it there in time. And that would have been a great annonymous way to solve the problem. Now you're stuck debating about whether or not to discuss it in person instead of solving the problem by phone hiding behind your bushes. I don't know....I guess I'd let it go if it was me but I'd be prompt to call the cops if it happened again.
Our neighbor is on summer break and will be a SR. in HS in the Fall.
Mom was out of town for a few days, on one of those evenings about 20 kids parked far down the street and all walked up to her home. There was a keg...
Anyway, we called the non-emergence police number but the kids all left before the police came . Perhaps they were dropping off the keg for the next evening or perhaps they were kicked out of another party.
Do I mention to our neighbor that this happened?
Oh, too bad you missed this one. If you had the parents or any family member's phone number you could have called and said, "I'm so sorry I forgot about the party tonight...my husband (or wife) forgot to tell me. Would you like me to bring a dessert or drink- oh wait! Since you've already got a keg, shall I bring cups?"
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Savor the irony. 
Hmmm....let me see, destruction, petty theft, heavy petting/other things that shall remained unnamed...the "happy drunk" the "angry drunk" the stupid kid that decides he can drive.
