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There was a boy my daughter knew that also had a rocky home life, mom with a string of BF's who didn't really want to parent him, etc.. He started hanging around our house when he was 15 and saw the kind of home life he wanted so he did whatever he could to be here. He would stay with us from time to time but never moved in. Today he is 22 and still hanging around like a member of the family. He still lives with his mom and they get along better now that he is an adult. He has been working for years (and even got my son a job), has never been in trouble, just bought a car and is learning to drive, and will be moving into a house with some friends in the fall. He also signed up for his first college class. He is moving a bit slower than some but considering he was wandering mostly on his own as a teen I think he did pretty good for himself.
I offered him a lot of help, but I was in a good position to do it. I often wonder how he would have ended up if he hadn't found his way to us since many of my kids friends, kids with every opportunity, have ended up in all sorts of trouble. I would gladly do the same for any of my kids friends. But they can't live here and I don't want to be responsible for them.
I sugest if you permit to tell you that that everybody in this question would go to one psycholog cause he can see the emotions on over this problems and advice too about your rights and her rights you to be more safe to help her or her son to find a way to solve all questions.I hope I could help you.
Best bet, talk to the kids and tell them this may work, if you all have a meeting, together, at the same time with her Father. To discuss the issues. That way, no one has half or misinformation. And I bet the girl will have a story why that is impossible. That is when you end the entire drama.
There was a boy my daughter knew that also had a rocky home life, mom with a string of BF's who didn't really want to parent him, etc.. He started hanging around our house when he was 15 and saw the kind of home life he wanted so he did whatever he could to be here. He would stay with us from time to time but never moved in. Today he is 22 and still hanging around like a member of the family. He still lives with his mom and they get along better now that he is an adult. He has been working for years (and even got my son a job), has never been in trouble, just bought a car and is learning to drive, and will be moving into a house with some friends in the fall. He also signed up for his first college class. He is moving a bit slower than some but considering he was wandering mostly on his own as a teen I think he did pretty good for himself.
I offered him a lot of help, but I was in a good position to do it. I often wonder how he would have ended up if he hadn't found his way to us since many of my kids friends, kids with every opportunity, have ended up in all sorts of trouble. I would gladly do the same for any of my kids friends. But they can't live here and I don't want to be responsible for them.
Dang. What's really funny is this same guy, now 25, is currently living with me and renting my daughters old room. He's still working and has ramped up on the college classes but talk about eating my words!
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