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When I went for the ultrasound to find out what my son was, we took our daughter. When the technician said that he was a boy, my daughter whispered to her daddy, "That's a load of barnacles." (she watches Spongebob) She wanted sister.
When I was pregnant with my youngest I asked my daughter (who was 6) if she wanted a sister or a brother. She said; "What I want is a monkey." After her little sister was born and was crying one day my older daughter said; "See, I told you we should get a monkey."
While babysitting a friend's three year old I had to stop by the pharmacy at the hospital. While in the waiting room the tv's were tuned to the Bill Clinton speech, "I did not have sexual relations with that woman!" Well, within seconds of him appearing and everyone being quiet to hear his speech, she stands and loudly states, "Oh, that Bill is so silly!"
Everyone busted up laughing, and that was before his powerful sentence came out!
My 3 year-old nephew, who had just been potty trained, was asked to say the prayer over breakfast. It went a little like this...
"Heavenly Father, thank you for this day. Thank you for our food. Thank you Auntie Banker could come see me. And thank you for letting me to go poopy in the potty. Amen."
Location: The Chatterdome in La La Land, CaliFUNia
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One time my cousin informed me that my 4-yr old niece was doing something she wasn't supposed to do (don't remember what it was). When I asked her if she was doing whatever it was, she responded "No ...My nose is growing" (She knew she was lying! LOL!)
I was watching my niece (who was now 6 years old) and her friend one day. I was jokingly asked the friend if her feet stink. She replied "No". I then asked her what did they smell like. She responded "Payless"
I have more but I better get to bed. Thanks to everyone for sharing your funny stories. I got a lot of chuckles from them.
The first time i ever met my neice;who lived away ;I came to my sisters house to see the family. She was riding her trke with a squueeze horn on the patio. As I walked past she sounded the horn and said ;egt out of my way you jerk. When i asked where she heard that she said;thatis what momma says when she drives. Alos my wife nephew got mad one day and he keep saying duplex;I learned that he thought it was a curse word.Watch what you say around kids because you might not be the one to hear it from them.
We went to a Chinese buffet tonight for dinner. The cooks are all Hispanic, the wait staff is Oriental... you, AUTHENTIC Chinese!
At one point, my dd (7) and I were at the table alone. Our section had just cleared out and the waitress was bussing the tables near us. My daughter watches her for awhile and then turns and says to me, "I think it's just great that they let people like that work here, don't you?"
I looked at the waitress who had stopped and was staring at us, looking a little stunned. I asked her, "What do you mean "people like that"." "Oh you know mom... people that look like they are Chinese... it's nice that this restaurant is here so they can have jobs."
I was a little stunned myself. I said something like.. "People that look Chinese... you mean Chinese people? That sounds a little silly." ... and left the rest of it alone. Her remark was completely innocent, if a bit offensive. We tipped the waitress maybe a bit more than we would've otherwise.
When our son was about three or four years old we were eating out at a restaurant where the tables were set very close together. My son was wearing his Batman costume and telling us how strong he was. "Are you stronger than Superman?" we asked. "Yes, lots stronger!" "Are you stronger than Spiderman?" "Yes!" "Are you stronger than . . the Abominable Snowman?" "Yes" said our son "and when I see him I'm gonna rip his balls off!" Both of our mouths fell open and we both simultaneously said "What do you mean?!" "I'm gonna rip his snow balls off." he said, obviously thinking it was a real snowman. We wondered what the other people at nearby tables thought!
Last edited by Sandhillian; 10-14-2009 at 09:39 PM..
Reason: typo
So I'm very ill at home with my four year old and we have been counting fingers recently. While I'm laying on the sofa half dazed from a number of meds and fever my child stands up from in front of her movie gives me the bird and says quite loudly with a straight face, " MOMMA WHAT NUMBER IS THIS? " Laughing while coughing still hurts, i don't care who you are.
One of my sons was 6 at the time. We were in a court situation (another story) so my son had to go the chair next to the judge, kinda like Judge Judy....anyway the bailiff lends out his hand to help my son get into the chair, so my son puts out his hand as if to push the bailiff away and says very calmly, No, thank you, I am fully capable of getting into the chair myself.. The Judge then looked at me and smiled and shook his head.
my grandma had bought me and both my older sister and my younger sister a big pool well we didnt get to use it for a long time and eventually there was holes in it so me and my older sister seriously frustrated couldnt fill up the pool my younger sister standing there in her bathing suit with floaties on then said "how comes the pool wonts fill up" i then replied "there are holes in it" she paused and looked confused then got a snobby look on her face "well how cans there be holes in the waters?" she asked
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What number is the bird?
