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I gave my 2 teenagers both drug tests. My son's came out positive for smoking pot. I've been suspecting he's been smoking it lately. He plays basketball for hours at the rec center down the street. When he comes home sometimes he won't even look me in the eye. He makes himself a plate of food, eats it and goes to his room and goes to sleep.
I want him to understand that it's a bad thing, but i don't know how to! The only thing he really enjoys doing is playing basketball. I don't want to take away from him the only thing he enjoys! I'm on the fence with this one. He's a good kid otherwise - does whatever I tell him to do, very respectful to me, and he could be out there doing something worse.
My mother didn't really handle my mishaps in the most positive ways growing up. I felt like I didn't have much structure, and there was too much time for doing whatever I wanted to do. I try my best, but because I didn't have the best upbringing, there's a lack of what I can go with.
i gave my 2 teenagers both drug tests. My son's came out positive for smoking pot. I've been suspecting he's been smoking it lately. He plays basketball for hours at the rec center down the street. When he comes home sometimes he won't even look me in the eye. He makes himself a plate of food, eats it and goes to his room and goes to sleep.
I want him to understand that it's a bad thing, but i don't know how to! The only thing he really enjoys doing is playing basketball. I don't want to take away from him the only thing he enjoys! I'm on the fence with this one. He's a good kid otherwise - does whatever i tell him to do, very respectful to me, and he could be out there doing something worse.
My mother didn't really handle my mishaps in the most positive ways growing up. I felt like i didn't have much structure, and there was too much time for doing whatever i wanted to do. I try my best, but because i didn't have the best upbringing, there's a lack of what i can go with.
greetings,
i would be a giant in the neighborhood or area he is hanging out in.
Make them nervous. Let them know your presence. Let them know your son is under age.
Nobody likes the presence of a parent around. Smile at them.
Let your son know your not going to hide and duck, because he is doing this. Form a neighborhood watch group to watch the area this is taking place in. Get the local churches praying about this. Get him to a good youth group at church. Ask them for a mentor there in church that he can speak with.
You sit down on this and the ole devil will walk in and snatch him
up.
Will be praying for god to grant you with wisdom and favor..
At least you care. That means a lot. The kid who lived above us (also 17) was a pot head for months and recently held a three day pot party when his mommy went out of town. His mother didn't even BOTHER to return home until a week later after the cops were called nor was he disciplined for disturbing the peace and harassing us.
We had many strange incidents the year we lived there. Many a night I would be in bed choking (from his drugs) or my husband would say there is a funky smell in here...
We wound up moving out.
We still see him driving around....(great, like we need another stoned teen on the roads) and he's still sitting home languishing in his room. This kid was a sports star and popular the first half of his senor year and the second half he was nothing but a burn out who never went to school.
I urge you to take action before he (your son) loses his future. I mean, life is not like Reefer Madness but your child knows he is doing wrong and you do not want him to hurt himself or others when high.
I would def. know if something was going on in the house. My sister said at least he had the respect not to do it around me....but in my opinion, that's not the point.
You nailed it on the head. I don't want him to end up to be a burnout.
I do search both of their bedrooms when they're not home to make sure they don't have anything that shouldn't be there. Neither of my kids don't know I do this, but what am I supposed to do?
How did you give your kids drug tests and do they know?
Maybe you can explain to your son you found pot in his system and that you do not want him to use it.
Have you ever discussed drugs with your kids before this? Maybe it's time to sit them both down and have the talk about these things.
You can buy a "pee" test at CVS. You can buy them to test for heroin, marijuana, cocaine, etc. He knows that his test is positive. I've tried to talk to him about it. He feels very uncomfortable and won't talk to me. I told him how I felt about it, but I feel i need to go on a different approach. I also told him that if I ever found any type of drugs in the house, that I would call the police!
He told me that it's not big deal, and that he knows people who smoke pot with their relatives. I really don't care! that's not how I conduct my home life!
I have discussed drugs with both of them. I have family members with substance abuse issues, and they've seen how they live. I have a sister who lost custody of all of her children due to a heroin and cocaine addition. I've also took my own cousin's daughter in when she had her issues.
I'm curious. If your son is otherwise obedient and respectful, what drove you to search his room and give him drug tests? Was he in trouble before and you check up on him, or did you only start doing this because he was acting funny?
First of all ..... don't panic! A large number of (if not most) successful professional and business people smoked pot in their youth .... although not all of them inhaled
Smoking pot is not the end of the world. But you need to understand the "why" and you need to find a strategy to separate him from his pot-smoking buddies without alienating him.
I had the conversation with both of my kids. But them I had the experience of being a teenager in the late 1960s and 1970s which gave me an advantage my own mother did not have. My tactic was 1) to make the discussion factual and to avoid blame and recriminations and 2) to point out the downsides of pot in terms of the effect on the individual and the consequences of getting into trouble.
I'm curious. If your son is otherwise obedient and respectful, what drove you to search his room and give him drug tests? Was he in trouble before and you check up on him, or did you only start doing this because he was acting funny?
Because I know what it's like to be that age. I know what it's like to want to experiment and try to fit in.
I've been looking through their things since they were about 11 or 12. Call me paranoid, but I've seen a lot, and just feel the need to try and protect them that much more.
"Son, people who smoke cannabis are not welcome in my house. If you're old enough to decide to smoke, you're old enough to live on your own. You need to make a decision."
Having said that, it could be worse. He could be drinking alcohol.
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Be a giant
