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If you are the mother only you can decide that...what feels right for you? Just remember that your baby needs to feel secure...your baby depends on you for that. You want your baby to develop a secure attachment with you, leaving your baby to cry and ignoring his/her needs does not promote secure attachments! How old is your baby?
This should be a 2 part survey. For a newborn, I would not let them cry more than 5 minutes, maybe 10 minutes for 6 months old, and by the time they are a year old they should be able to self soothe (or learning it) and should be able to go a little longer before checking.
Of course, all this is assuming the baby is not hungry, wet, or poopy, and is crying to be comforted. My babies never cried just to cry, because they were able to self soothe at 6 months old.
How long is too long to let your baby cry at night alone in their room before you go in to check on them and pick them up and soothe them?
How young is too young to let a baby cry alone in their room without checking on them, picking them up and comforting them?
I don't think there is any right answer or even an answer seeing that every baby is different and even every baby has different nights/moods in a one week period. No one baby does the exact same thing every night for the same reason for 12 months.
Some think baby up to 6 months; some 8; some 12. Some think their 2yr olds are still babies. It's all relative.
You do what you think is right for YOUR baby. Case closed.
I'm not asking because I want advice. My baby is three and we've always co-slept so it's not anything that ever came up. I agree that parents need to trust in themselves to do what is right for them, their babies and their families. I was just wondering how this method is used by others because I've learned through talking with parents and spending time in other parents homes that this is a very common practice.
From what I've read about sleep training you aren't supposed to start until they are 4 to 6 months old and you are supposed to go in and check on them in intervals. When talking to people I've learned that some people start using this method on newborns and many people don't check in at all. Just wondering how this method is used by parents and where people's comfort level is with it. I figured this would be a good place to ask since there are so many different parents here with so many different parenting styles.
Oh, and I wanted to make it a two part poll but couldn't figure out how.
From what I've read, if you're going to let a baby cry it out it is best to do it after they are strong enough to roll over and sit up by themselves but before they are able to stand up and climb (or fall) out of their crib. That window will vary with each individual child.
I let both of my kids cry it out when they reached about 6 months old. It was very hard to listen to them cry and not go to them - I can certaintly understand why it wouldn't be the method for everybody. But it only took a few nights for my kids to become great self soothers and terrific sleepers.
From what I remember, both of my kids would cry for (15-20 minute?) stretches and then drift off to sleep - I did not go to them. Then they would wake up, cry and drift off again. After a few nights of this, they were sleeping through the night.
I'm not asking because I want advice. My baby is three and we've always co-slept so it's not anything that ever came up. I agree that parents need to trust in themselves to do what is right for them, their babies and their families. I was just wondering how this method is used by others because I've learned through talking with parents and spending time in other parents homes that this is a very common practice.
If you've already talked face to face with parents about it...why do you need to post it on this site other than to see the debate?
You do your thing. Let others do theirs. Especially when there are already posts mentioned "good" parenting.... b/c they ARE the subject matter expert...
I used the Crying it Out method with both of my daughters.. however, the length of time I allowed them to cry varied with their age and circumstances. I didn't start it at all until after both had already proven that they were capable of sleeping through the night (My oldest was 8 months, and the youngest was 5 months). I also didn't do CIO when they were cutting teeth or otherwise sick. I did the bedtime routine, and then would let them cry for 5 minutes.. I would go in and comfort them (but I would not turn on a light, talk to them, or pick them up) by tucking them back in and patting their back or giving them a hug, then leave the room again. If they started crying again, than this time I would extend it to 10 minutes before repeating the comforting/leaving process. Neither of my girls needed more than 10 minute stretches of CIO before going to sleep.
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b/c they ARE the subject matter expert...
