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Old 05-03-2007, 03:14 PM
 
12 posts, read 75,539 times
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My ex husband was ordered to pay child support two months ago. Just to discover he quit his job and is out of state. What can I do to get child support for the children I have with him. His Mom knows where he is, what should I do???? Please help
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Old 05-03-2007, 07:40 PM
jco
 
Location: Austin
2,120 posts, read 5,861,655 times
Reputation: 1389
I'm sorry; I don't have an answer. I just wanted to say that I hope you find this guy and receive some help. This must be a very difficult time for you.
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Old 05-03-2007, 08:13 PM
 
Location: Vancouver, Canada
550 posts, read 2,541,006 times
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I am not sure either. Can you get lawyer advice? There must be something that can be done when he starts working again even if he is in another state.
I hope someone on here can give you some useful advice.
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Old 05-03-2007, 08:41 PM
 
Location: Happy wherever I am - Florida now
3,359 posts, read 10,633,860 times
Reputation: 3812
Call the court that ordered the child support and tell them what you have said here. Some states have enforcement divisions that may be of help.

It's despicable that people let their children suffer.
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Old 05-04-2007, 12:07 AM
Status: "meltdowns are life!" (set 20 days ago)
 
14,469 posts, read 30,505,986 times
Reputation: 6327
I'm in Texas, and all I had to do was call the attorney general's office, and they got the ball rolling. It took forever, but they caught up with him and the money is now slowly trickling in. The child in question is going to be 20 this year, and his father is going to be paying me till he's probably 25! Don't give up--child support is owed to you and only death will ever erase that obligation. It is actually a felony for a person to cross state lines to avoid paying, but it's hard to prove. Good luck, and I hope that maybe his conscience will kick in before too long. And hard as it may be, don't run down the child's dad in front of them--it's not the kid's fault, and it is their father--you don't need to make your kid feel worse!
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Old 05-04-2007, 12:12 AM
Status: "meltdowns are life!" (set 20 days ago)
 
14,469 posts, read 30,505,986 times
Reputation: 6327
Oh, I forgot--my ex liked to jump from job to job--but they have a national child support registry now! Whenever he's hired anywhere, they automatically run his SS# thru the system and he is flagged (supposedly anyone who has a child support order is flagged), so the employer is alerted to the fact that they need to withhold some of their earnings. If they don't, they are subject to fines, etc. Also, they can intercept your ex's income tax return, make it hard/impossible to renew any type of professional license he may hold (if he's delinquent), or even throw him in jail. There are things in place to help your child!
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Old 05-04-2007, 02:38 PM
 
Location: Monterey Bay, California -- watching the sea lions, whales and otters! :D
1,906 posts, read 6,124,729 times
Reputation: 2601
Quote:
Mapalo: My ex husband was ordered to pay child support two months ago. Just to discover he quit his job and is out of state. What can I do to get child support for the children I have with him. His Mom knows where he is, what should I do???? Please help
Quote:
Sapphire: Oh, I forgot--my ex liked to jump from job to job--but they have a national child support registry now! Whenever he's hired anywhere, they automatically run his SS# thru the system and he is flagged (supposedly anyone who has a child support order is flagged), so the employer is alerted to the fact that they need to withhold some of their earnings. If they don't, they are subject to fines, etc.
That's all true and well and good, however, if the man does not work "on the books," and is working being paid in cash, then they have no way to track him -- I know through hard experience.

I have written to the Governors of the state I am in and the one he is in; I have gone to the State Legislators; I have contacted the District Attorney's offices; I have done many, many things. Each state is different, so you have jump through the hoops for each state.

The last time they "found" my ex, they took him to court to take his driver's license away -- he had the joke on them....he didn't even HAVE a driver's license (it was expired)! I'm sure he thought that was great fun.

My only hope is that since he is now 58, that he will try to collect Social Security at 62, and THEN he will be getting a federal check, and that will be garnished. When I talked to him several years ago, I mentioned (again) that if he did not start paying that my daughter would get "extra spending money" when he collected Social Security. His response: "What? You mean I'm going to be a poor old man??" Well, DUH.... YEAH....we're poor NOW!!!

Welcome to the cruel world of child support. All you can do is to make sure you are registered with your local Child Support Enforcement agency, make sure you have his social security number, and they will try to track him down. Also, do what you can on your own -- maybe call an employer that you think he is working for, or write to your Congressman, call your legislators -- just keep all paperwork and don't give up! Unfortunately, too many men end up working for cash, and then they claim they don't have any money -- of course, like mine, they're living in a fancy two-bedroom, two-bath condo in Las Vegas, wearing $800 shoes, wining and dining new women, and living the high life -- but they "don't have any money" to give you. Grrrrrr.

I'm so sorry for you. I know how difficult it is. My daughter is now 17, and she never wants to see her father again (he's only seen her 3 times in 17 years). I went back to school and got my master's degree, and I have a decent job with a local county agency now -- that's all I could do. I still piecemeal things together, I still shop at really cheap places, and I live paycheck to paycheck. But....my daughter knows she is loved, she knows I have bent over backward for her, and she even last night told me how much she appreciates everything I do for her and that it has made her a better person. It's in moments like that when you realize you're doing the right thing.

Good luck to you and NEVER stop persisting!!
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Old 05-04-2007, 04:30 PM
 
2,833 posts, read 9,603,614 times
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In the state of Pa., there is a new hire report that all employers should fill out when hiring a new employee. They do a background check for any child support payments that are overdue, and it is garnished from your wages.
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Old 05-04-2007, 04:38 PM
 
Location: Monterey Bay, California -- watching the sea lions, whales and otters! :D
1,906 posts, read 6,124,729 times
Reputation: 2601
Quote:
I Love PA: In the state of Pa., there is a new hire report that all employers should fill out when hiring a new employee. They do a background check for any child support payments that are overdue, and it is garnished from your wages.
That's the catch. They have to be working for a "real" employer who files taxes, and is paying them a real paycheck. If they are working off the books and not filing taxes and the company is paying in cash, then Child Support really does say that the man has "no money." (Unless proven otherwise, and they do not have the money or resources to go after most of them.)

In theory, it sounded like it would work, but after 17 years of trying to get support, I have learned the hard way. Both win: the employer doesn't have to pay taxes or benefits; the person who owes support doesn't have a way of being tracked by Social Security or payroll. That's the only reason it works.

We once -- when he accidentally thought he could slip into a "real" job and had his wages garnished -- received a child support check for....TWO CENTS! Yep -- my daughter actually kept that check just as proof about how lazy and uncaring he was. TWO CENTS!! And that came from the Child Support agency! It was insulting.

It's just a horrible situation dealing with that stuff. I'm glad my daughter will be in college soon and on her own. If she ever gets any back child support, it will be nice spending money for her.
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Old 05-07-2007, 08:34 AM
 
12 posts, read 75,539 times
Reputation: 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wisteria View Post
That's all true and well and good, however, if the man does not work "on the books," and is working being paid in cash, then they have no way to track him -- I know through hard experience.

I have written to the Governors of the state I am in and the one he is in; I have gone to the State Legislators; I have contacted the District Attorney's offices; I have done many, many things. Each state is different, so you have jump through the hoops for each state.

The last time they "found" my ex, they took him to court to take his driver's license away -- he had the joke on them....he didn't even HAVE a driver's license (it was expired)! I'm sure he thought that was great fun.

My only hope is that since he is now 58, that he will try to collect Social Security at 62, and THEN he will be getting a federal check, and that will be garnished. When I talked to him several years ago, I mentioned (again) that if he did not start paying that my daughter would get "extra spending money" when he collected Social Security. His response: "What? You mean I'm going to be a poor old man??" Well, DUH.... YEAH....we're poor NOW!!!

Welcome to the cruel world of child support. All you can do is to make sure you are registered with your local Child Support Enforcement agency, make sure you have his social security number, and they will try to track him down. Also, do what you can on your own -- maybe call an employer that you think he is working for, or write to your Congressman, call your legislators -- just keep all paperwork and don't give up! Unfortunately, too many men end up working for cash, and then they claim they don't have any money -- of course, like mine, they're living in a fancy two-bedroom, two-bath condo in Las Vegas, wearing $800 shoes, wining and dining new women, and living the high life -- but they "don't have any money" to give you. Grrrrrr.

I'm so sorry for you. I know how difficult it is. My daughter is now 17, and she never wants to see her father again (he's only seen her 3 times in 17 years). I went back to school and got my master's degree, and I have a decent job with a local county agency now -- that's all I could do. I still piecemeal things together, I still shop at really cheap places, and I live paycheck to paycheck. But....my daughter knows she is loved, she knows I have bent over backward for her, and she even last night told me how much she appreciates everything I do for her and that it has made her a better person. It's in moments like that when you realize you're doing the right thing.

Good luck to you and NEVER stop persisting!!
Thank you so much for this message God greatly bless you and your daughter. I feel so encouraged. Thanks again for the info.
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