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Old 05-04-2007, 08:40 AM
 
Location: Sonoran Desert
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I would like to hear the opinions/experiences of others who have moved their kids to another part of the country into a new environment. I am particularly curious about whether their is an age limit where the kids are greatly bothered at being uprooted from friends, unable to adapt to the new area, make new friends, fit in etc. I realize that sometimes you have no choice, but I do, so would like so input.
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Old 05-04-2007, 09:04 AM
 
Location: NY to FL to ATL
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We moved from Florida to Georgia six months ago with a three year old and she is having a horrible time adjusting, believe it or not. I never thought a child that young would be affected.
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Old 05-04-2007, 02:17 PM
 
Location: Monterey Bay, California -- watching the sea lions, whales and otters! :D
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This thread had a lot of good replies -- it might be useful.
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Old 05-04-2007, 06:09 PM
jco
 
Location: Austin
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I moved at least once a year growing up. Every time there was a period of adjustment, and my mom said that every time I cried when I had to leave family or friends. The first time it really rattled me emotionally was our move after fifth grade. I remember it being a very dramatic thing for me. Every year after that seemed to be worse.
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Old 05-04-2007, 06:35 PM
 
Location: Mayberry
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My folks moved us from LA to Placerville, in northern California, I was in 7th grade and in LA I was at the largest junior high west of the Mississippi. It was extreme culture shock. I ended up at an elementary school and the girls were wearing knee socks, I had been wearing nylons in LA, (this is so long ago_) any way, I got teased a lot about being tall and skinny. My mom thought there would be outhouses there and everything. We were, afterall, city people, Santa Monica, Hermosa Beach, Venice Beach and all of a sudden here we were in the country. It turned out to be the best thing my Dad could have done, we moved right before the Martin Luther King Riots.

I don't think any age will affect a child as much as their own self-esteem and you as parents.

Good Luck!!!
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Old 05-04-2007, 11:58 PM
 
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I was moved from Long Island to Florida when I was 10 and about to go into 5 th grade. The worst thing that ever happened to me. They learned a bit faster than in NY and I didn't fall behind so much, but kinda had to catch on quickly. They were already learning Cursive and I had not seen it before. They had learned how to tell time and I was never taught. Everyone was into Boyfriends and girlfriends already and in NY, everyone in 4th grade had cooties. In NY, classrooms had one teacher and 4 walls. Here one big wall divided in 4 areas called "pods" and you switched to a new teacher every hour. So very distracted and unorganized. Even though I started 5th grade there, It was hard to make a "real " friend and I was very homesick. I missed my house and huge backyard, I missed my friends and family and when winter came, I missed the snow. I was so depressed and cried almost everyday for months and months. I am still angry that we moved here and have wanted to leave ever since. I was so sad and miserable that after a year of it not getting any better, my mom had enough and every summer sent me back to NY to my grandparents. Plane tickets were an April birthday present. I hated coming back. I eventually had a lot of friends, but was still homesick. I've been here since '84 and cant wait to get out. It's not so much NY that I miss anymore, it's just that I HATE Florida. I need to see the seasons change, I miss the snow. It's so hot here. 85 degrees here today and it's not even summer yet. Having to be prepared all summer for hurricanes is very exhausting. When we were told we were going to move here, the only thing my brother and I (ages 10 & 12) thought of was Disney World -YAY!! We didn't even think about missing family, friends, snow, school. Boy, were we stupid. The both of us are trying to save and get out of here. North Carolina is our destination. And I'm doing it when my kids are 3 and 7. They hate the heat too. Always complaining. Needless to say, we stay indoors most of the year running up our A/C bill like everyone else. Will we miss Disney? Nope, people here can't afford to go to Disney as often as people think we can. We'll come and visit in about 10-15 years like everyone else does. If I was you, and my child was older than 7 or 8, I'd stay put untill after they graduate High School. Unless they hate where they are and really want to go too. Do they like their school? Do they have family and friends around? Please consider your kids feelings about your move. They are people with opinions too. Good Luck.
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Old 05-05-2007, 02:16 PM
 
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Each child would be different some adapt easier and others are homesick. I think if your child has started high school its not good to move them unless you are not happy with thier peers. Junior high might be a problem for some. But high school never.
My family was military, I wouldn't wish it on any kid.
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Old 05-08-2007, 04:29 PM
 
Location: Turn Left at Greenland
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I've always considered the "red zone" to be 5-8th grades. This is the time where social groups are already established and it's hard to break in, especially if you are moving somehwere where you don't know anyone.

When we moved 4 years ago, our then 18 month old wouldn't bathe for a week! Our then 2 year old was just fine! We may be moving again and now our kids are 6, 5 & 2 ..
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Old 05-08-2007, 07:50 PM
 
Location: Fredrikstad Norway
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Quote:
Originally Posted by alexander59 View Post
Each child would be different some adapt easier and others are homesick. I think if your child has started high school its not good to move them unless you are not happy with thier peers. Junior high might be a problem for some. But high school never.
My family was military, I wouldn't wish it on any kid.
I agree... it is different for every child. I moved 7 times with my parents... When I was 15 we went from Texas to Chicago... moved in, was adjusted and LOVED it... tried out for cheerleading.. made it... only to be told we would be moving at the end of the summer... My parents had known from the time we moved to Chicago that they we would be leaving... but didn't want to tell me, because they were afraid I wouldn't TRY... to make friends etc. I took that move HARD... I was 16 and HATED my new school.... the day after I graduated I went back to Texas... (where I had spent most of my school years) I went to 3 different HS's... And have yet to make it back for a reunion... which one would I go to? I hated my school in DE... Wasn't in Chicago long enough to really keep in touch... and I didn't actually graduate from the school in Texas.
That being said.... I think all of the moves have made me the person I am today. I'm not afraid of change... Moved to Europe to go to college after my freshman year... after graduating I went to work on Cruise ships as a translator, where I met my Norwegian Husband... and now live here in Norway (the second time) We moved back here almost 2 years ago, when my oldest child was 6.. and my youngest 1. I wish that we would have moved back here when my son was younger... so he didn't have to start school not knowing anyone... He speaks perfect Norwegian... but he is still soo American ( like his mamma) that I think it has been more difficult to fit in. We moved to a very small community (where my husband grew up) and all of the kids he goes to school with have known each other since birth.
My daughter on the other hand... doesn't rmember anything else...
It is totally going to depend on the child... and I guess where you are moving!
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Old 05-21-2007, 01:14 PM
 
Location: in a house
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I have a fourteen year old strong willed son. We lived in the same area that he was born until he was eight when I divorced and we moved to my parents only twenty minutes from his birthplace. A year later I remarried his dad and we have moved as a family ever since, mainly to find an affordable area for a guy that works for himself and for better opportunities for us as a family. He had adjusted well to all of the moves except for now. We moved back to his originial hometown almost two years ago, although his old friends have nothing to do with him. We found it is just to expensive to live back here in California, our hometown, and in order to have a better quality of life and better financial opportunities, we will be moving back to the last state we lived in which is Massachusetts. My son is very upset which he should be, claims he will make our lives a living hell for doing this to him, of which I don't blame him but it still breaks my heart. I truly believe once he has settled in to high school there and makes friends and gets involved in activities, that he will forget his promise to destroy us. He does make friends easily which I believe he wouldn't have the skills for if we had lived in the bubble we are in now. It isn't easy for anyone to move so much. As adults we can't establish true friendships which take much longer as adults in the first place with uprooting all the time. At least he will be in the same school all through high school. This is not something I would wish on anyone especially children, but if it will provide more food on the table and a better way of life, then you have to do what you have to do and hope when you're children are grown, that they will understand why you had to do this.
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