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Old 05-07-2007, 01:43 AM
 
Location: :0)1 CORINTHIANS,13*"KYRIE, ELEISON!"*"CHRISTE, ELEISON" KYRIE, ELEISON!"0)
2,519 posts, read 4,934,575 times
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CONGRATULATIONS to you both!
You for raising him right! And he deserves praise for putting into practice what you taught him & for telling you!

In todays world children are not safe in any bathroom!
I was watching a documentary sevral months ago, about detectives on unsolved cases or something on pedophiles, cannot really remember because I missed 1/2 of the show.
But the story goes, that a 7 or 8 little girl went to the bathroom in her Church, while the parents stayed back in the service. An older (grandfather type, I think in his 70's?) man (monster) was driving a taxi and had to go to the bathroom, so he stopped at the Church and bumped into her.
He UNFORTUNATELY raped her and killed her . I believe he was a repeated sex offender, and later when he was getting a massage told the massage lady as "SOMETHING GREAT" that he had done! Later this lady helped in capturing the guy. The point here is that this was a bathroom in a church! How sad is that .
Now again please be clear that it was NOT a person from the Church, it was a TAXI driver that stopped to use the bathroom! This also goes to show you what most Doctors tell you, is that CHILD MOLESTERS, PEDOPHILES, etc. NEVER get cured, they will always do it again! WHY THEY LET THEM OUT AGAIN IS BEYOND ME!!!!
And that regardless of what anyone tells you, ITS OK TO PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN in the world that we live in today!
And HOOSIER GUY is RIGHT, always follow that GUT feeling, that INSTINCT! ITS THERE FOR SOMETHING!!!
Glad to hear that nothing happened to your son!
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Old 05-07-2007, 05:42 PM
 
Location: Pikeville, Ky.
13,465 posts, read 21,217,203 times
Reputation: 17686
Isn't it a shame that we are forced to train up our children to trust no one. I know so many men who would like to work with children, because of a natural love for them. I felt so sorry for my father in law , he loved children so much and talked to all of them. He supported an orphanage and a lot of childrens charities. He was a southern gentleman in every sense of the word. Any way we were at a mall in my hometown (up north) and he sat down on a bench to rest. There was a little boy there with his mother. Anyway my dad inlaw started to talk to the little fella. The mother jumped up, shook her finger in dad's face, cursed him, threatened to call security..Then she jerked her little boy up by his arm and stalked off. Dad was so hurt and embarrassed. I protected my children and grandchildren when they were young, but never in the shameful way that woman did. Of course, being the forgiving person I try to be, she may have had trouble with a pervert in the past.(shrug),who knows..
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Old 05-07-2007, 06:16 PM
 
Location: PALM BEACH, FL.
607 posts, read 3,260,447 times
Reputation: 390
Quote:
Originally Posted by blue62 View Post
Isn't it a shame that we are forced to train up our children to trust no one. I know so many men who would like to work with children, because of a natural love for them. I felt so sorry for my father in law , he loved children so much and talked to all of them. He supported an orphanage and a lot of children's charities. He was a southern gentleman in every sense of the word. Any way we were at a mall in my hometown (up north) and he sat down on a bench to rest. There was a little boy there with his mother. Anyway my dad inlaw started to talk to the little fella. The mother jumped up, shook her finger in dad's face, cursed him, threatened to call security..Then she jerked her little boy up by his arm and stalked off. Dad was so hurt and embarrassed. I protected my children and grandchildren when they were young, but never in the shameful way that woman did. Of course, being the forgiving person I try to be, she may have had trouble with a pervert in the past.(shrug),who knows..

As I read the previous posts I thought of the same thing. I myself am very shy around strangers, all my life. I still would never talk to ANYONE in a rest room. Will just one person realize that this man may have lost his son at some point and still wishes that his son didn't die. And that he wished he had someone to raise up and care for, someone to teach how to throw a baseball and fish with. Why must everything be of a sexual nature?

I am also curious as to why the son and father went to find the man that talked to the boy. What would be the good in that? Why confront a person for paying a compliment? As we all know, not everyone in the world lives by the same social codes.

I have a daughter. She is five years old. When I am not with her I'm not as happy. Often times if I see a little girl between 3-5 I look at the little girl and I think about my daughter. I smile. Then I catch myself and turn away for fear of making the parents uncomfortable. The media has turned the public against men liking children in any way.

What a shame!
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Old 05-07-2007, 06:23 PM
 
16,092 posts, read 35,806,429 times
Reputation: 6264
Quote:
Originally Posted by blue62 View Post
Isn't it a shame that we are forced to train up our children to trust no one. I know so many men who would like to work with children, because of a natural love for them. I felt so sorry for my father in law , he loved children so much and talked to all of them. He supported an orphanage and a lot of childrens charities. He was a southern gentleman in every sense of the word. Any way we were at a mall in my hometown (up north) and he sat down on a bench to rest. There was a little boy there with his mother. Anyway my dad inlaw started to talk to the little fella. The mother jumped up, shook her finger in dad's face, cursed him, threatened to call security..Then she jerked her little boy up by his arm and stalked off. Dad was so hurt and embarrassed. I protected my children and grandchildren when they were young, but never in the shameful way that woman did. Of course, being the forgiving person I try to be, she may have had trouble with a pervert in the past.(shrug),who knows..

It's a real shame. I know I once wanted to teach when I retire - but now, no way! All some kid has to do is make up a story and you lose your retirement money and may end up in jail.

I stay at least 20 feet from all children and give them dirty looks. I will not be accused of anything. Too bad the world has come to this.
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Old 05-09-2007, 12:21 AM
 
Location: Washington
73 posts, read 185,877 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lakewooder View Post
It's a real shame. I know I once wanted to teach when I retire - but now, no way! All some kid has to do is make up a story and you lose your retirement money and may end up in jail.

I stay at least 20 feet from all children and give them dirty looks. I will not be accused of anything. Too bad the world has come to this.
ANYBODY SEE ANY CONNECTION BETWEEN TALKING TO A KID IN A BATHROOM, AND TEACHING HIM IN A CLASSROOM? IS IT POSSIBLE THAT TO SOME PEOPLE IT IS THE SAME THING??
FDR said that those whom know their needs of restriction, should put them in place. - I would be far more questionable of a fellow whom gives "dirty looks" to a kid, then one who makes a natural comment!

By the way, in the Television series, the wonder years, a fellow makes a comment to a child in a restroom, also someting to the fact that hes cute. Anybody wonder if and where the child might have "saw" the incident that took place "to him?"

Be nice, Be friendly, Make The World A Better, Happier Place!
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Old 05-09-2007, 01:05 AM
 
Location: Debary, Florida
2,267 posts, read 2,382,360 times
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I agree with Hoosier here...

Unfortunately pedophiles make it necessary that we as parents are always vigilante AND be vigilante without frightening your kids to death OR locking them in their room...

I have never heard of men chatting to another in the bathroom while standing at a urinal unless they are with someone they are friends with. I have always been curious about this because in womens bathrooms, we have stalls only, I always thought it strange that this was not the case in mens bathrooms...the friends I have spoken with have said they keep their eyes straight forward and discourage communication...funny picture when you think about it...but nonetheless.

Your son must have been uncomfortable or he would not have mentioned it, that would be enough for me.
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Old 05-09-2007, 05:38 AM
 
Location: FL
1,943 posts, read 7,633,437 times
Reputation: 2237
Quote:
Originally Posted by dennis s View Post
Why must everything be of a sexual nature?
Because unfortunately, there are people in this world that make EVERYTHING of a sexual nature. Tell that to the little black girl who was raped and killed in a restroom. Too many babies are raped, killed, molested....too many to count. Also unfortunately, it's better to think the worse than to go around expecting the best....and then it's a little too late.

Quote:
Originally Posted by dennis s View Post
I am also curious as to why the son and father went to find the man that talked to the boy. What would be the good in that? Why confront a person for paying a compliment? ?
Now maybe you think it's okay for compliments to be given to young children in restrooms. Maybe you think it's okay for compliments to be given to a strange child.
I find that is ridiculous. Don't talk to my child with your privates in your hand, in a restroom, and you don't know him.

What would we have done? Asked him that. Tried to find out.

No the media hasn't turned men away. The men themselves who have committed these horrible horrible, horrible crimes has turned men away. The media has reported it so that people like me know that these kind of people are out there, and what may have been so simple as a compliment may have also been a perverted comment that could have been worse had that other man not have been there.

Last edited by Jammie; 05-09-2007 at 10:34 AM.. Reason: offensive word
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Old 05-09-2007, 10:40 AM
 
2,688 posts, read 5,835,619 times
Reputation: 1285
Your son's caution was wise. Your husband's search through the restaurant for the man was an overreaction. If the man was just being friendly (not every older person realizes how the world has changed with regard to child-rearing), a nice person would have been falsely accused. If the man was a pervert, he certainly wouldn't have admitted anything.

In the end, your son deserves to be complimented for being careful, and for telling you. And your husband is a good dad for being concerned, and to reinforce your son's response, even if he went a little too far.
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Old 05-10-2007, 10:07 PM
 
Location: Between Here and There
3,684 posts, read 10,846,948 times
Reputation: 1650
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrshvo View Post
One night, about 2 months ago, my family and I went out to dinner. My son is 11, so we had let him go to the bathroom by himself. HAD let him. Anyway, that night at dinner he went to the bathroom. When he came back, he let me know something. When he went to the bathroom there was an older guy getting ready to use the urinal. My son went into the stall and quickly used the bathroom. When he came out, the older guy was still at the urinal, and my son went to the sink to wash his hands. Another guy came in, looked at my son, and went to the urinal. He looked at the older guy in the urinal next to him, and asked him "...is that your son?", referring to my son. The older guy said no. Then this guy turns to my son (mind you, this guy is at the urinal), and says to my son "you're a fine young man." My son said thank you and then left.

The second he told me this, I write away am thinking "pervert" and "pedophile", and had my husband walk my son around the restuarant to find this man, to no avail. Even my husband admitted it is strange for a man to say something to a strange child, when everyone knows that children should have been warned by their parents to not talk to strangers, plus, why talk to my kid while you're urinating!

I think that if that older man had not been in there...that something could have happened. i don't let my 11 year old son go to the bathroom anymore; I make my husband take him. One of my friends said that it's ridiculous. I don't think so. I have read too many horrible stories in the news...

Am I doing the right thing? What do you think is the reason this strange man woul dhave called my son a fine young lad?
I think you are right. I will only let my older son go to the bathroom with his older cousin together. If my nephew isn't with me I take him to the ladies room with me...he hates it, but if this is the worst thing I've ever done to him growing up well that's just fine with me. Better safe than sorry.
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Old 05-27-2007, 08:16 AM
 
Location: City of the damned, Wash
428 posts, read 2,219,130 times
Reputation: 255
O, irony of ironies.....now I need some advice on this subject. Last night, an adult male called our home phone and asked for my 13 yo daughter. He said he wanted to wish her a happy Memorial day weekend. We think we know who he is, (which scares me, he's not the type we'd ever associate with). The stepdad of one of her classmates. It didn't sound as if he'd been drinking.

What do you all think, while I'm waiting for my LEO friend to call me back?
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