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Old 05-27-2007, 08:20 AM
 
Location: Debary, Florida
2,267 posts, read 2,375,648 times
Reputation: 685

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Quote:
Originally Posted by missyM View Post
O, irony of ironies.....now I need some advice on this subject. Last night, an adult male called our home phone and asked for my 13 yo daughter. He said he wanted to wish her a happy Memorial day weekend. We think we know who he is, (which scares me, he's not the type we'd ever associate with). The stepdad of one of her classmates. It didn't sound as if he'd been drinking.

What do you all think, while I'm waiting for my LEO friend to call me back?
Thats even stranger...the odd word in passing in the bathroom is one thing but this man is calling you at home??

You should be able to get his phone number from caller id, if you don't have that then you can dial *69 after someone calls you, that will give their phone number. If you don't know the number you can often find it in a reverse phone number search at places like Find a Person or Business with our free online White Pages and Yellow Pages.

Is he a stepfather to a friend of your daughters??
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Old 05-27-2007, 09:04 AM
 
Location: City of the damned, Wash
428 posts, read 2,217,442 times
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His cell # showed up.
I wouldn't say she and the girl are friends at this point, because they've gone in totally different directions, mostly because she has a horrible family life and it affects her behavior very negatively.
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Old 05-27-2007, 10:51 AM
 
Location: Debary, Florida
2,267 posts, read 2,375,648 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by missyM View Post
His cell # showed up.
I wouldn't say she and the girl are friends at this point, because they've gone in totally different directions, mostly because she has a horrible family life and it affects her behavior very negatively.
Did you ask him why he was calling your daughter and then of course ask your daughter the same?? Hoping of course one of them will tell you anything...

Maybe I am overprotective but I would be on that happening like nobodies business...Even if this girl and your daughter were still the best of friends I think its strange for an adult man to call one of his step daughters friends to wish them a happy holiday about anything...
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Old 05-27-2007, 11:20 AM
 
17,158 posts, read 22,167,733 times
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lisa,,just got on this thread and to respond to your original question,, i guess, while we do always have to have our guard up....because of the kooks and perverts, there may be a flipside....maybe he lost a child or grandchild,,and your son reminded him, maybe he has very little time left,,and throws out as much compliments as he can,
i remember going to the lumber yard,,with my grandfather, and helping him out,,carrying lumber and many men would comment on what a fine lad i was,,,
how many guys,(as kids),,use to get a head "rusle" from other men,,,kind of a "good-lad" thing..
i remember teachers, and other men,,winking at me,,,kind of an approval or good job thing,,

its too bad we live in a world,,,where there are too many pervs and kooks
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Old 05-27-2007, 11:30 AM
 
Location: City of the damned, Wash
428 posts, read 2,217,442 times
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Oh, yes, I called her right away at her grandparent's house, to check her whereabouts, then to ask if she knew a man named _______, then to tell her what had happened.
She hasn't hung out with the girl for +-3 yrs.
The stepdad was here once or twice to pick up the stepdaughter when she visited.

I did ask him "______ Who?"
Then said "I don't know you",
so he had plenty of opportunity to tell me in english who it was, or even say something like, "Oh, I didn't mean to scare you".
But he didn't, so am thinking he's out to intimidate and make an enemy for life. (Hopefully nothing worse.)
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Old 05-27-2007, 04:15 PM
 
Location: Debary, Florida
2,267 posts, read 2,375,648 times
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My daughter has a cell phone...

I make a point of checking her cell phone on a regular basis to see who she is texting and who she is calling and calling her.

I found a text message from no one either of us knew, it turned out to be a teenage boy, it looked like from the text that he was sending out text messages arbritrarily...I called him and asked him if he realized he was texting a 10year old girl, he said he did not...I told him if I found another text message from his number I would track him to his door personally AND then call the police...he promised to never text that number again...and so far he hasn't.

I said this too him calmy but with deadly seriousness...I think I worried him a little but that was my point.
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Old 05-27-2007, 09:56 PM
 
Location: City of the damned, Wash
428 posts, read 2,217,442 times
Reputation: 255
Those random things can be spooky too.
It's scary to think what we could conceivably do to protect our kids, at least it is for me. Hope I don't end up in jail someday for it, as we all do. (Sure could use that phone call soon- bummer that law enforcement never gets a holiday off.)
Good night,

Missy
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Old 05-28-2007, 05:08 AM
 
Location: FL
1,943 posts, read 7,627,049 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mainebrokerman View Post
lisa,,just got on this thread and to respond to your original question,, i guess, while we do always have to have our guard up....because of the kooks and perverts, there may be a flipside....maybe he lost a child or grandchild,,and your son reminded him, maybe he has very little time left,,and throws out as much compliments as he can,
i remember going to the lumber yard,,with my grandfather, and helping him out,,carrying lumber and many men would comment on what a fine lad i was,,,
how many guys,(as kids),,use to get a head "rusle" from other men,,,kind of a "good-lad" thing..
i remember teachers, and other men,,winking at me,,,kind of an approval or good job thing,,

its too bad we live in a world,,,where there are too many pervs and kooks
See, I do understand that. I think it is the fact that it was in the bathroom. Where privates are hanging out. Perhaps if it was someplace more innocent...like helping me out in the grocery store or something...but it is a shame that the world is full of people that do such...awful things to children, that we have to be thinking that maybe innocent people are one of them...
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Old 05-28-2007, 08:50 AM
 
Location: Debary, Florida
2,267 posts, read 2,375,648 times
Reputation: 685
Do you ever watch to see what the people look like, the people who prey on children? Watch Dateline when they do their sting operation, they have people online pretending to be children and then men solicite them, then these same men show up to have an encounter with the children...

These are normal everyday people, they don't look evil, they don't have horns.
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Old 05-31-2007, 10:49 PM
 
743 posts, read 2,038,280 times
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I, too have felt sooo uncomfortable w/ my kids using public restrooms without a parent of the same sex with them. I have two daughters and one son. When my son is w/ me, I would bring him in the women's room and he could use a stall....as he's gotten older he is embarrassed to do that, so now I stand by the door and talk loudly "hey, eveything okay in there? Are you almost done?" so that it is obvious he's being watched and supervised by me.

I think the predators "strike" when they have the opportunity (when no one is looking, when they feel it's safe so they won't get caught, etc).

I thougth it was weird that my husband took the girls w/ him in the mens public rest rooms (he has a bladder the size of a pea), but at least they are with him and not alone in the women's rooms (even though I dont' feel nearly alarmed by sending kids in the women's rooms alone as the men's rooms).

I also think the swimming pool and locker rooms are other areas which can be uncomfortable re: this issue. I don't want my 11 yo son walking through a women's locker room and seeing naked women walking about and also don't want him traveling through the men's locker room alone.......I hate all of this, but know, as parents we must (unfortunatly) always be on guard.

But, the botom line is....if you get a "gut" feeling about anything, chances are you're right. I believe God gave parents a special instinct.
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