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Old 03-24-2014, 11:56 AM
pll
 
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No regrets. I didn't realize it would be so difficult and so rewarding at the same time. Also, I wish I would have embraced every age and laughed a little more because they do grow up and leave home.
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Old 03-25-2014, 09:20 AM
 
Location: NYC
10,093 posts, read 6,077,552 times
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I don't think most parents ever regret having kids unless they are single parents and it was a mistake to have them.

Kids don't all turn out they way we all envisioned, they have their own personality and traits from you.

The problem with raising kids these days is the more and more families have both parents working and this is one of the biggest challenges to raising a family.

If you ask anyone who would want to grow up in a family where you see your teacher or nanny more than you see your parents.
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Old 03-25-2014, 10:12 AM
 
Location: Denver, Colorado U.S.A.
14,174 posts, read 21,169,071 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tanque Verde View Post
Heh..heh..
More than anything else we never let our kids forget who the boss was. We were always their parents, never their friends. Even now in their late 20's and early 30's we keep it that way, although not quite so much now.
The payoff , they can make their own way through life without the need of my help or the help of taxpayers.
Really? You don't consider adult children your friends? I agree with not trying to be friends with my 6 year olds, but once they become responsible adults, I look forward to a very close friendship. That's something I never had with my own parents, and now that they're old and in need of my help, I just see them as horrible burdens. Because they never thought of me as anything but a kid to be told what to do! They have never respected me as an adult, or even seemed to care about my life. They didn't contact me for 15 years, until we had kids (their grandkids). And I'm not some adult screw-up. I put myslef through college, served in the military, own a very nice home, and have kids who are doing very well.

All my parents ever did was ignore me until I did something wrong, then they were there for the spankings and punishment (I'm not against spanking, BTW), but mostly just left me on my own. No advice, no mentoring, no friendship of any type. I'm glad they taught me to be self-disciplined, but overall, I think they did a poor job of parenting, especially as I got older and in my adulthood. Sometimes I question whether I even love them.
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Old 03-25-2014, 10:16 AM
 
Location: Mammoth Lakes, CA
3,064 posts, read 6,166,994 times
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When I attended my 25 year High School reunion, my husband and I were just about the only people present who never had children. It was amazing how many of my former classmates were open about resenting their kids, the expense of them and how envious they were that I never was burdened with the expense of having kids. So many of these people did little else but complain about their children.

I think they were honest because these were all people I had known intimately in the past and they knew they'd never see me again. There was safety in knowing they could speak their mind and they wouldn't be judged.
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Old 03-25-2014, 12:42 PM
 
Location: Round Rock, Texas
8,342 posts, read 7,814,546 times
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Originally Posted by riaelise View Post
No. Not ever.

Being a parent has its share of challenges, and there were times I wanted to just go - somewhere - but it is probably one of my most worthwhile time investments. The relationship I have with my daughter cannot be measured.
Almost five years since I posted this, and another child later, and I still feel the same way. No regrets whatsoever. My life was great before kids and my life continues to be great. Sure, parenting ain't easy. I probably still **** my mother off. Sure kids can be expensive. But I willingly signed up for the job. No one put a gun to my head.
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Old 03-25-2014, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Denver, Colorado U.S.A.
14,174 posts, read 21,169,071 times
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I'll say that I didn't enjoy the first 3-4 years with our twins, but now that they're almost 6, I love and enjoy them so much! I love that we're a fun family, unlike the family I grew up in. This is my chance to have a family I feel a part of. I have few family members outside my own kids/spouse, and none of my bio family has any concern with me, so I risked ending up old and alone with no family someday without having kids. But it's more about having a family that I never got as a child.
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Old 03-25-2014, 03:18 PM
 
Location: Houston, TX
11,153 posts, read 5,828,586 times
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I believe both my parents regretted having me. If I had had control over them becoming parents, I would have chosen never to exist. My mom had severe mental health issues. Whether it was bipolar or what, I don't know, but she tried to kill herself several times and was in and out of the mental and regular hospital. My dad divorced her when I was a baby and drifted in and out of my life (mostly out). I haven't heard from him in three years. He favors his other three kids. I chose not to be a parent because I didn't want to screw up someone else forever. I believe if you're going to be a parent, be 100% committed to be a good one, 100% of the time. Otherwise, get an abortion.
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Old 03-25-2014, 11:12 PM
 
Location: here
23,591 posts, read 26,246,854 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vision33r View Post
I don't think most parents ever regret having kids unless they are single parents and it was a mistake to have them.

Kids don't all turn out they way we all envisioned, they have their own personality and traits from you.

The problem with raising kids these days is the more and more families have both parents working and this is one of the biggest challenges to raising a family.

If you ask anyone who would want to grow up in a family where you see your teacher or nanny more than you see your parents.
You say that as if they are one in the same.
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Old 03-26-2014, 05:18 AM
 
14,049 posts, read 11,552,781 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ulysses61 View Post
When I attended my 25 year High School reunion, my husband and I were just about the only people present who never had children. It was amazing how many of my former classmates were open about resenting their kids, the expense of them and how envious they were that I never was burdened with the expense of having kids. So many of these people did little else but complain about their children.

I think they were honest because these were all people I had known intimately in the past and they knew they'd never see me again. There was safety in knowing they could speak their mind and they wouldn't be judged.
Many parents, rightly or wrongly, feel a misplaced pity for those who are childless, and will go out of their way to make it seem as if you are not missing anything.
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Old 03-26-2014, 09:26 AM
 
1,638 posts, read 3,968,946 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
Many parents, rightly or wrongly, feel a misplaced pity for those who are childless, and will go out of their way to make it seem as if you are not missing anything.
Plus some people really like to complain and make everything sound like an awful mistake; kids, marriage, work, college, etc. If we form opinions based on the complaints of others then it's easy to be convinced that nothing is worth doing.
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