News, Columbine Killer's Mom: 'No Inkling' Son Suicidal. (teens, pregnant, parents)

[John1960]

In the first detailed public remarks by any parent of the two Columbine killers, Dylan Klebold's mother says she had no idea her son was suicidal until she read his journals after the 1999 high school massacre.

Susan Klebold's essay in next month's issue of O, The Oprah Magazine, says she is still struggling to make sense of what happened when her son and Eric Harris killed 12 students and a teacher in the shooting rampage at Columbine High School in suburban Denver. Twenty-one people were injured before Klebold and Harris killed themselves.

Columbine Killer's Mom: 'No Inkling' Son Suicidal - ABC News

[virgode]

Not recognizing suicidal tendencies is understandable,
killing others and an arsenal of guns and bomb making
is something else, totally clueless.

[sskkc]

Great lessons for parents in the Columbine stories.

So much for "giving your teen space" and "respecting their privacy".

I'll bet there are a lot of parents in Colorado right now who wish that Dylan's parents had paid more attention to their son.

[Pandamonium]

I cannot imagine being in that woman's shoes. I can't imagine waking up every day with the knowledge that it was your kid that did that. I can't imagine leaving the house and running into the other kids or the parents of the kids that died. That has to suck on so many levels. Especially, on a daily basis.

[121804]

None of us, unless we had a child directly effected by Columbine, have any right to judge this woman. As she stated in the article, she basically lives in a daily hell knowing her son is completely responsible for destroying the lives of many families and then killed himself.

I remember Columbine.

And as mentioned above, it was, and still should be, a wake-up call to parents of teenagers.

I don't think any parent particularly gives their child space in hopes that they become mass murderers and for all we know, b/c his mom has said so little, she was involved in his life. Regardless, not one of us is the perfect parent who has never messed up...she might have messed up at the worst time...and if she did, I guarantee she lives with that thought day in and day out.

It was a horrible day & event.

We need to learn from it, not judge it.

[maciesmom]

BTW....from everything I have read and remember, the Klebolds cooperated fully with the police and all that bomb making stuff went on in the other boy's home/garage. Dylan seemed to have a pretty good relationship with his family. I do feel for his parents.

[phonelady61]

it is hard for me to understand how a mother or father does not or cannot see suicidal tendancies in a teen ager if anything you might suspect something get help , it might not be anything ,might be something but still dont be clueless . this mother to be seemed to be self involved and not truly see her son for the person he was . I often wonder when I hear these stories how could they not see it ? Im not saying I am a perfect parent but my sons did talk to me and have a relationship with me . I think that is the most important thing that a parent can have is a relationship with their child . I feel for her , that her child is dead and killed several others .

[Sampaguita]

Originally Posted by 121804

None of us, unless we had a child directly effected by Columbine, have any right to judge this woman. As she stated in the article, she basically lives in a daily hell knowing her son is completely responsible for destroying the lives of many families and then killed himself.

I remember Columbine.

And as mentioned above, it was, and still should be, a wake-up call to parents of teenagers.

I don't think any parent particularly gives their child space in hopes that they become mass murderers and for all we know, b/c his mom has said so little, she was involved in his life. Regardless, not one of us is the perfect parent who has never messed up...she might have messed up at the worst time...and if she did, I guarantee she lives with that thought day in and day out.

It was a horrible day & event.

We need to learn from it, not judge it.

Excellent post.

Originally Posted by phonelady61

it is hard for me to understand how a mother or father does not or cannot see suicidal tendancies in a teen ager if anything you might suspect something get help , it might not be anything ,might be something but still dont be clueless . this mother to be seemed to be self involved and not truly see her son for the person he was . I often wonder when I hear these stories how could they not see it ? Im not saying I am a perfect parent but my sons did talk to me and have a relationship with me . I think that is the most important thing that a parent can have is a relationship with their child . I feel for her , that her child is dead and killed several others .

How do you get that the mother is "self-involved" from the posted article above?

I think teens are very good at hiding things from their parents and presenting themselves the way they know their parents would like to see them.

I'm in no position to judge her parenting - I have no idea what kind of relationship she had with her son. All I know is that I would absolutely hate to be in her shoes - losing a son under those circumstances and knowing that her son was directly responsible for murdering so many people. She must live in agony.

[cpg35223]

Originally Posted by 121804

None of us, unless we had a child directly effected by Columbine, have any right to judge this woman. As she stated in the article, she basically lives in a daily hell knowing her son is completely responsible for destroying the lives of many families and then killed himself.

I remember Columbine.

And as mentioned above, it was, and still should be, a wake-up call to parents of teenagers.

I don't think any parent particularly gives their child space in hopes that they become mass murderers and for all we know, b/c his mom has said so little, she was involved in his life. Regardless, not one of us is the perfect parent who has never messed up...she might have messed up at the worst time...and if she did, I guarantee she lives with that thought day in and day out.

It was a horrible day & event.

We need to learn from it, not judge it.

Well, that's a nice sentiment, but learning from it means understanding what this poor woman did wrong. They had weapons everywhere, evidently. They listened to music that glorified violence. And a whole raft of other clues.

No parent thinks their child will get pregnant, do drugs, or shoot up a lunch room. But a good parent keeps a sharp eye out for the danger signs and intervenes early. While we believe in giving our children space, we've already told them that privacy in our household is not an option. If we want to look through their drawers, we do.

I can't tell you how many kids we've seen over the years head for trouble, and their parents were totally asleep at the switch--all in the name of not wanting to be meddlesome.

[121804]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

Well, that's a nice sentiment, but learning from it means understanding what this poor woman did wrong. They had weapons everywhere, evidently. They listened to music that glorified violence. And a whole raft of other clues.

No parent thinks their child will get pregnant, do drugs, or shoot up a lunch room. But a good parent keeps a sharp eye out for the danger signs and intervenes early. While we believe in giving our children space, we've already told them that privacy in our household is not an option. If we want to look through their drawers, we do.

I can't tell you how many kids we've seen over the years head for trouble, and their parents were totally asleep at the switch--all in the name of not wanting to be meddlesome.

She screwed up. I'm sure she has thought about that once or twice the past 10 years...

Again, sitting there & saying it would never happen in your house b/c you are involved is a mute point.

None of us are better than her.

It's a learning lesson and judging her based on how you are/were a super involved parent does nothing but allow you to stand on a pedestal.

I can only hope what I am doing will teach my boys the right ways in life. I can only hope & my dh & I work very, very hard at it. But we can't guarantee.

Learning versuses judging.

Pointing your finger and saying "Shame on you for not being like me" does nothing. Judge all the poor parents out there..it does not one thing for their children.