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Ok, 1st and foremost I am new to the forum and this site but enjoy it! I have a 9 month old son and as a new parent I would like to think I'm doing well being that I have had experience in watching close friends with their kids and being the oldest of 5 within my family. My son is wonderful, very happy child, sees me and always greets me with a smile no matter what but lately it seems like he's trying to start his own personality and I don't want it going in the wrong direction. If I leave the room instead of him crying it sounds like he's just plain yelling until I come back in which it stops. I take him out and sit him with me while I get dressed in the morning and he's calm. I try to get him dressed and now it seems like he fights me on that also so I dont know if this is the beginning of things to come or if I stand firm will he understand? I think he does because when I tell him "NO" he will notice it and start crying...I just remember as a child me being spanked lightly (old school) as a reminder or as a startle to notice that I'm doing wrong, but at what age is that ok? I don't want him growing up as that child that no one wants to babysit or be around because he's now all of a sudden cranky all the time.
thoughts?
Last edited by Bo; 10-27-2009 at 09:31 AM..
Reason: Moved from San Antonio forum.
...I just remember as a child me being spanked lightly (old school) as a reminder or as a startle to notice that I'm doing wrong, but at what age is that ok?
We have 20 months old twins, and I do give them a light tap (for attention, not to cause pain), say on the hand when one of them keeps playing with the buttons on the TV, or on the upper thigh when they struggle a lot during a diaper change. We started this at over a year old (I can't remember exactly- we didn;'t decide on an age and then start...), basically when we felt that talking to the child would be productive/ they would understand because their cognitive behaviour and verbal development was advanced enough, when they could understand "no" and still did the unwanted behaviour.
At the age of your boy, I think re-direction is best... ie try to entertain him with something else, get his attention away from the bad behaviour.
At the age of your boy, I think re-direction is best... ie try to entertain him with something else, get his attention away from the bad behaviour.
I agree; I think 9 months is a bit young. I always used spanking/swatting as a consequence for willful misbehaviour. I don't think it's willful at that age. Just trying to process different experiences, IMO.
I know that it is hard to listen to your little one cry, but remember that it doesn't necessarily mean that something's wrong. It's the only way they can communicate and deal with their feelings. Re-direction is great, but also remember that crying helps them process their feelings. You don't always need to stop it immediately.
Please do not be mistaken, I am speaking of the "attention tap" penguin is talking about...I dont spank to cause pain but I do spank his hand lightly as a reminder to him so he knows that what he's doing is wrong by playing with things he shouldn't.
Please do not be mistaken, I am speaking of the "attention tap" penguin is talking about...I dont spank to cause pain but I do spank his hand lightly as a reminder to him so he knows that what he's doing is wrong by playing with things he shouldn't.
Then honestly the word "spank" shouldn't have been used, because it's never okay to spank your child.
Oh puhleeze. Let me guess, you call the police on someone who spanks their kids.
Nice personal attack there, cupcake. It's not my business how others discipline their children unless they're injuring the child, so cool your accusatory jets and take a chill pill. However, the OP asked the question, and I answered it. He should have worded it differently though, in order to be clear about what he meant.
Quote:
Spank their butts early and often.
You're the type of parent that a child grows up to resent, and who will leave you to rot in a dingy nursing home when you start needing your diaper changed and drool wiped off your chin.
Good luck with that, let us know how it goes for you.
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Let me guess, you call the police on someone who spanks their kids. 