U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 05-11-2007, 02:27 PM
 
Location: Miami. Florida
942 posts, read 2,330,262 times
Reputation: 892

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by vpcats View Post
ohhhhhh. Gosh and it was a long one. Well, it should still be in my box so I can always re-send it but I'll wait to see what you get from Markablue.
I just sent her a pm I'll let you know what she said. Maybe theres something wrong with the server?? As you can tell Im not technical at all!!

But I do know how to check my inbox.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 05-11-2007, 02:31 PM
 
Location: Lots of sun and palm trees with occasional hurricane :)
8,292 posts, read 14,583,368 times
Reputation: 6980
I looke up "boot camps" Florida and got a ton of links. I didn't get into all of them of course but it seems like there's plenty of info. Seems that the ones in Florida have actually been closed down.

Then I saw this:
http://www.military-school.info/trou...?source=google

There's something about military BASED behavior modification centers and there's a phone # for more info. It seems like military SCHOOLS don't want, or won't accept, kids who don't want to be there but there are these other places that are LIKE military schools that will take defiant kids.

I wish there could be some way to check these places out first and get some real life references from other parents and prior students.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-11-2007, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Sacramento, CA
788 posts, read 3,715,827 times
Reputation: 708
I think the military school might be a good option. I was also thinking about the wilderness camp Barbara Walter's daughter operates for troubled teens. I think it is in Colorado somewhere (maybe it would be good for him to get out of Florida for a little while). They have summer camp programs too, so maybe that can be step #1, and if he doesn't shape up, military school is step #2?

Best of luck to you and your family Pixiedust. Hopefully, these trials will help shape him into an incredibly wonderful adult some day.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-11-2007, 02:50 PM
 
Location: Miami. Florida
942 posts, read 2,330,262 times
Reputation: 892
Quote:
Originally Posted by vpcats View Post
I looke up "boot camps" Florida and got a ton of links. I didn't get into all of them of course but it seems like there's plenty of info. Seems that the ones in Florida have actually been closed down.

Then I saw this:
http://www.military-school.info/trou...?source=google

There's something about military BASED behavior modification centers and there's a phone # for more info. It seems like military SCHOOLS don't want, or won't accept, kids who don't want to be there but there are these other places that are LIKE military schools that will take defiant kids.

I wish there could be some way to check these places out first and get some real life references from other parents and prior students.
I wouldnt put him anywhere that I couldnt thoroughly check out first. In Novemeber when I took him to Montana, I first went myself to see the place because I didnt feel comfortable with the pictures (too little) in the website. Do you think he'll ever appreciate this when he's older?? Just a thought.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-11-2007, 05:28 PM
 
Location: Miami. Florida
942 posts, read 2,330,262 times
Reputation: 892
There is a junior member with my user name Pixie Dust (without the space) thats were my PM's are going. I sent Marka a PM to see if she could retreive it for me. Wish they wouldnt allow names so close together.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-11-2007, 07:13 PM
 
Location: Lots of sun and palm trees with occasional hurricane :)
8,292 posts, read 14,583,368 times
Reputation: 6980
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pixie Dust View Post
There is a junior member with my user name Pixie Dust (without the space) thats were my PM's are going. I sent Marka a PM to see if she could retreive it for me. Wish they wouldnt allow names so close together.
WOW. That's not good. Who knows what people can say on PMs. Mine is nothing that couldn't have been said in public but, wow, it's not good that anything can go to anybody else. This other person is probably so confused!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-11-2007, 08:40 PM
 
Location: Miami. Florida
942 posts, read 2,330,262 times
Reputation: 892
Quote:
Originally Posted by vpcats View Post
WOW. That's not good. Who knows what people can say on PMs. Mine is nothing that couldn't have been said in public but, wow, it's not good that anything can go to anybody else. This other person is probably so confused!

I could imagine her thinking..."what kind of site am I on that people think I'm so screwed up!"

Wrong Pixie Dust...Im the screwed up one.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-11-2007, 10:57 PM
 
464 posts, read 686,444 times
Reputation: 143
Oh Pixie Dust, I am so, so sorry for all that you are going thru, I can't imagine how you are coping with everything. I have no advise just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and sending good thoughts and prayers to you and your family. One little thing hug your older boys and let them know how much you love them and apprecitate them, they need to know that they are not forgotten.
T
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-12-2007, 01:35 AM
 
Location: Anywhere but here!
2,800 posts, read 9,107,038 times
Reputation: 1688
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pixie Dust View Post
Hello to all. Well my birthday was on Wednesday. I was feeling a little stressed because the day before we had a creditors meeting for our bankruptcy court. It all went well because we didnt have any real debt only the 15k premium on our escrow from the forced insurance. Which the judge found to be rediculious and agreed on our bankruptcy as a true claim. Let me just add that it is the most defeating experience to file for bankruptcy IMO. That happened on the 8th.

On May 9th, I thought Im going to be positive. I had music on Micheal Buble. I was baking my b-day cake and seasoning skirt steak for a bar-b -q when the boys get home and my hubbie gets home from work. Simple but nice. Well as I was taking out my cake I get a call from the Miami-Dade police at my sons school. My youngest Daniel had the day before ran up to another child and "snatched" his ipod and ran. I felt like all the life was drained from my body. To say the least I felt like I was going crazy. We have been having problems with him for several months.

For the history on this folow this link:

The hardest problem I have EVER faced....advice please

Well I spent most the day crying and mad. I went to take him out of juvenile detention at about 11;30 pm. I was seriously considering leaving him there until his court date but my mom and mother in law said that wouldnt be right. He is not detained at home until July 27th for court and has to abide by certain rules or he gets sent back to juvenile detention. His reasoning?? I wanted money. Doesnt everyone want money. Yeah, they do but they work for it!!!! Well I did an Alec Baldwin I called him a looser, parasite, scum and Im not sure how many other things. Do I regret it?? NO. Im at my last straw. I dont have any sympathy for him at this point. What he did was act like a common criminal and this is NOT the way I raised him or his brothers. Daniel is under psychological treatment but there is a part of me that says he knows right from wrong and this is wrong. He is being charged with a class three felony for robbery by "snatch". Should I get an attorney or stay with the public defender??
Happy belated Birthday Pixie! I am so sorry this all had to happen on ANY day, much less your birthday...that really stinks!
IMHO...if YOUR attorneys and/or court systems where you are, are ANYTHING like they are where I live (pretty small town, and really corrupt), I personally would look at hiring an attorney licensed in your state, of course, but from a completely different town. Too often, the local attorneys (especially public defenders) are in cahoots (not sure of spelling...you know are in on it together...side with each other, maybe line pockets etc) together.
My daughter was sexually assaulted at work when she was 16 (last year) and the restaurant she worked for would not do anything about it...they were too afraid to lose a "good cook". I found out my daughter wasn't the only one and tried several avenues to have the cook fired, or charges brought up on him or something...but NOTHING. Our local law enforcement questioned him, but the guy barely speaks ANY english and managed to convince the cops that he did nothing (note: this guy is 24 yrs old and my daughter is 16) but they wouldn't do anything! What happened to sexual assault on a minor? hmmmm
Anyway, because I couldn't get anywhere and was TOTALLY frustrated with the situation, I decided to call around for lawyers. I could not get one single lawyer in my town to take the case. I ended up going with a lawyer 250 miles away, and I don't regret it at all!
I think you will be much better off finding a lawyer from another town, if AT ALL POSSIBLE!
Good luck to you!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-12-2007, 12:50 PM
 
17,181 posts, read 22,210,802 times
Reputation: 31317
pixie,,id ask daniel to write a letter of apology to the kid he stole the ipod from and to his parents,,(this would be one of many conditions, if he comes home) you also,,write some comments on the letter.

thiers a fine line between tough love, and being an enabler a crutch, and safety-net...i've seen many mothers ripped apart, by thier sons actions,,,they just want to hold/hug thier son like he was eight again,,,and usually have a soft spot. this is natural.
ive been around much of this behavior,,,and the young man,,,,im sorry to say,,,wont listen to you,,,wont listen to step-dads..IF he thinks you are there as a safety net for him,,,you can scream all you want at him,,,but he wont "hear" you,,til you get to the point,,where,,you yourself are able to drive him to the police station/juvenile hall, etc,,,,and NOT try to be his savior..what if he snatched an ipod,,from the worng,,kid?? and that kid,,or his older brother ,,stabbed him?? im not saying this to be mean, but since he has no rationalization of consequences,,,,
,im a firm believer,,in being very strict,,

you can give him,,just one more chance,,,,just one more screw up,,,and hes in a juvenile hall, home,,etc,,(out of the house)
but when he messes up,,you have to be the one,,driving him there,, and be able to do that,,,if he senses you cant,,he'll try to walk all over you,,

and clearly explain,,,,his future is in his own hands,,,to your husband,,zero tolerance,,

and please dont get angry at your hubby, he's going thru this mess...to
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top