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Old 11-17-2009, 05:07 PM
 
Location: Southern California
890 posts, read 2,279,847 times
Reputation: 789

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Wife's been out of the work force since 1999.
We have a D13, S10 and D4.
Next year, D4 will be going to full time school.

Wondering how everyone managed or decided to go to work and pay for the necessary child care arrangements.

Wife says that the amount she would make, over half is estimated to go to child care alone.
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Old 11-17-2009, 05:12 PM
 
Location: USA
1,882 posts, read 3,824,724 times
Reputation: 1948
I don't see the sense in this. I would look into work-at-home options, starting a business from home, etc. Why work to pay childcare? She is needed at home.
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Old 11-17-2009, 07:26 PM
 
Location: California
28,770 posts, read 29,058,794 times
Reputation: 23564
It a tough decision but if she can swing it part time work would be the best best.

If not, and it's full time or nothing, look beyond the financial aspects and even beyond "think of the children" aspects and make sure your wife knows that HER life is still going to be there when the kids are gone and if she hasn't been anything but mommy it could bite her in the ass. If she has a career she enjoys it would be fine to go for that. The kids will be fine.
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Old 11-17-2009, 08:13 PM
 
Location: Denver area
20,282 posts, read 20,101,120 times
Reputation: 31503
What does your wife think? In all honesty, what she makes very well could go for child care. I personally think your older kids are at the age where it is really important someone is at home after school....if she could find a PT job that is during school hours that would obviously be great.

Oh! And be sure to reassure her that if she does end up working outside the home (either full or part time) you are looking forward to stepping up your involvment in those "home" chores/activities she's used to taking on at home while you're at work.
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Old 11-18-2009, 03:50 AM
 
20,793 posts, read 49,224,211 times
Reputation: 10406
You also need to figure in what it will do to your tax bracket, if it bumps you into a higher bracket, the rest of what she makes could go to taxes. If she wants to work and can find a part-time job during the school day, great, but unless you have a pretty high powered job, most often it doesn't make financial sense to have a "second income" if you have to pay daycare expenses. Ideally if she could get a job in the schools, she would work the same days/hours as the kids are in school.
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Old 11-18-2009, 04:33 AM
 
Location: Raleigh, NC
3,363 posts, read 8,475,132 times
Reputation: 1895
Think of it this way:

1. Any work she does is building work experience. If anything ever happened to you she'd be more able to step up and take over supporting the family.

2. Double the amount of income going into your IRA's or 401K's.

3. If anything ever happened to her, and she became disabled, she'd be able to receive more from disability. The more you pay in over time the more you recieve when and if you need it.

4. Sometimes one spouse receives a better benefit package than the other. At least you'll have more options.
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Old 11-18-2009, 05:09 AM
 
Location: Summerville, SC
1,149 posts, read 3,563,811 times
Reputation: 1115
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joseph Marnix View Post
Wife's been out of the work force since 1999.
We have a D13, S10 and D4.
Next year, D4 will be going to full time school.

Wondering how everyone managed or decided to go to work and pay for the necessary child care arrangements.

Wife says that the amount she would make, over half is estimated to go to child care alone.
Has she actually researched the amount she would make? And, if all three kids will be in full time school, I don't see how child care would be particularly pricey. Your wife hasn't worked for 10 years... she might need to do some research on current salaries. Plus, as others have mentioned - she is currently contributing nothing to her retirement - has retirement benefits been factored into her "over half" estimate? Salary is so much more than "take-home."

Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
I personally think your older kids are at the age where it is really important someone is at home after school....if she could find a PT job that is during school hours that would obviously be great.
Quote:
Originally Posted by golfgal View Post
If she wants to work and can find a part-time job during the school day, great, but unless you have a pretty high powered job, most often it doesn't make financial sense to have a "second income" if you have to pay daycare expenses. Ideally if she could get a job in the schools, she would work the same days/hours as the kids are in school.
Just FYI, many working parents manage to hold two full time jobs, that pay well, and are home when the kids get home from school. I work as an engineer, as does my husband - we'll actually be able to carpool and be back home by 3:15-3:30, and later on if one of us wants to wait for the kids to get on a bus for school, we can stagger our schedules and manage the same thing. You do NOT need to work part time - you need a job that allows for flex time (meaning, you have to work a 40 hour week, but you dictate the hours for the most part). When the kids have half days if where it will get tricky - since she hasn't been in the workforce, she might have a hard time getting more than 2 weeks vacation time to spend when the kids really need her at home (though then again, I'm sure the OP has some). If she has a flex-time job, then this is a non-issue.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sundance View Post
I don't see the sense in this. I would look into work-at-home options, starting a business from home, etc. Why work to pay childcare? She is needed at home.
Needed? No. Everyone who works (unless they have a nice family circumstance where they have free family daycare) has to pay daycare - last I checked, money doesn't grow on trees. She will be working for daycare, extra money for the household, and savings for her retirement - not to mention, actually building up her resume again, which she will need unless she plans on having another child every few years till she retires.

Quote:
Originally Posted by superk View Post
Think of it this way:

1. Any work she does is building work experience. If anything ever happened to you she'd be more able to step up and take over supporting the family.

2. Double the amount of income going into your IRA's or 401K's.

3. If anything ever happened to her, and she became disabled, she'd be able to receive more from disability. The more you pay in over time the more you recieve when and if you need it.

4. Sometimes one spouse receives a better benefit package than the other. At least you'll have more options.
Great post. I have a wonderful husband, and while I don't fear that we'll ever divorce, if god-forbid something ever happened to either of us, the other person needs to be able to make money, which means being marketable, especially in this economy.

Has the OP's wife actually researched her marketability and her earning potential?
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Old 11-18-2009, 05:18 AM
 
Location: Denver area
20,282 posts, read 20,101,120 times
Reputation: 31503
No offense Starry but you might want to wait until you actually have even one child let alone 3 and 2 of those close to being teens, before you answer some of these threads.....Of course some parents hold multiple jobs and parent. The OP in this case hasn't mentioned what the financial situation is, just that his wife has been out of the work force and they have three kids at home. She might be not ready to go back and they may or may not need the "extra" income. If she has been out of the workforce for 10 years she might not be able to find the kind of job that allows for the flexibility you are talking about. We don't know what her skills or work background are....The OP has also not mentioned HIS schedule and how that could help......

If she is able to get back into the workforce in some capacity now, it will be easier to make the transitition to full time with some experience under her belt...

I know you had a rough childhood and while financial security is obviously a good thing, it is possible for some families to do this on one income. That's great that you want to continue to work but it isn't for everyone and there are some very valid reasons for being available to your children more than many jobs allow...Believe it or not, there is more to life than "marketability" and "earning potential"....
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Old 11-18-2009, 05:25 AM
 
Location: Summerville, SC
1,149 posts, read 3,563,811 times
Reputation: 1115
Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
No offense Starry but you might want to wait until you actually have even one child let alone 3 and 2 of those close to being teens, before you answer some of these threads.....Of course some parents hold multiple jobs and parent. The OP in this case hasn't mentioned what the financial situation is, just that his wife has been out of the work force and they have three kids at home. She might be not ready to go back and they may or may not need the "extra" income. I know you had a rough childhood and while financial security is obviously a good thing, it is possible for some families to do this on one income. That's great that you want to continue to work but it isn't for everyone and there are some very valid reasons for being available to your children more than many jobs allow...Believe it or not, there is more to live than "marketability and earning potential....
I didn't think the question was "Can/Should my wife stay home?" I thought it was, "Can/Should my wife go back to work now that the kids are in FT school (usually 7.5-8 hours a day out of the house)?" I think I answered it pretty well - yes, of course she can manage it, though it would be easiest for everyone if she found a flex-time job. Obviously there is more to life than having a job - but at some point in your life, there is a life that YOU need to live for yourself and your future, not just for your kids, if your kids will be taken care of in a school environment for that much of the day. I think a good question would be, does she need to work? Does she want to work? If it is an issue of she needs to work, but doesn't want to... that's a whole 'nother can of worms. If she needs to work, but has misinformation on what she can earn, well... time to do research.

I'm sorry, but I can't get on the bandwagon of daycare being a horrible option, like some posters here (not you).
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Old 11-18-2009, 05:29 AM
 
Location: NW Montana
6,258 posts, read 11,932,144 times
Reputation: 3407
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joseph Marnix View Post
Wife's been out of the work force since 1999.
We have a D13, S10 and D4.
Next year, D4 will be going to full time school.

Wondering how everyone managed or decided to go to work and pay for the necessary child care arrangements.

Wife says that the amount she would make, over half is estimated to go to child care alone.
Always worked "shift" from the time they were about four weeks old.
Never saw each other for twenty years so now it is like we are on a honeymoon
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