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Old 11-22-2009, 07:29 AM
 
1,751 posts, read 2,831,070 times
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I had a plenty of time to wonder about this yesterday afternoon while watching my gf at her horse show. I am just going to start typing and see where this post brings me. Maybe, if I'm lucky, someone else has been in my shoes.
Its about airplanes and I know not many people here are into airplanes but it also deals with my parents, which maybe some people can relate when it coomes to hobbies/interest.

Much like me and my airplanes, my gf is really into horses. To her advantage, her whole family is into horses. I am just a person with a unfulfilled dream of one day being able to fly a plane. Maybe not for work, but being able to go out there and hop into a plane and fly it. I do have a few hours under my belt but not many-- 5 or 6 within a 5 year period. I never had the money to fly. The military route it out, I'm just not interested in it. My parents have never been supportive of my love of aviation. Whenever my mom asked what I wanted to be when I grow up I would say "a pilot". She would look at me and tell me to "be serious" and think of something else that I'd want to do. I've grown accustomed to driving to the airport by myself and watching airplanes or keeping my excitement to myself when we take off on a family trip. I still remember 5 years ago when I was snapping pictures of planes and my father snapped at me stop commenting "Don'tcha have enough pictures of planes???" I put my camera down and we left shortly after due to the others being bored.

I also remember that I could never comment on Herpa coming out with new airplanes. I use to be into collecting 1:500 Herpa Wings but whenever I'd comment on the newest model, they'd quickly diminish my excitement and told me to "save your money."

All these thoughts were racing around in my head as I watched my girlfriend on her horse and her aunt, uncle and friends of the family do "horse games" at a local stable. She is able to enjoy her hobby to the fullest because she has a horse. Granted, a PPL (+ other ratings) alone cost much more than a horse.

I am not sure if I'll ever get my PPL. Cost is an issue and I know working at a flight school isn't helping. A) They don't offer a discount and B) Working here I get to see all the people that get to fly and obviously the ones that are in my shoes (can't afford it) don't come in here. C) I wokr the desk and it feels a bit embarassing when customers ask if I am a pilot and I have to say "no". I get a funny "ok why are you working here then" look.

How can I "deal" with just having aviation as a hobby?
Just spotting and going on flight sim, getting the most out of that but not becoming a pilot?

Anyone else in my shoes in regards to the parents? Yes, yes I am 23 and do my own thing but as a child it sucked.

Now, I've just learned to keep my excitement to myself and will be doing that when we fly the A380 next month. General comments.
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Old 11-22-2009, 07:55 AM
 
615 posts, read 1,508,545 times
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I can offer some insight. I love horses, they were/are my passion, and in a completely non-horsey family it wasn't easy. Horses are not cheap either. My parents helped out a little when I was in middle school with initial lessons and part of my board but as soon as I was 16 and could get a job I was completely on my own. I managed to fork out $3-400/month through high school and college and beyond. I didn't have any money for anything else though.

I also have the pilot perspective because my husband was one and we met when he was 22 and I was 21. I was working the front desk, he was a flight instructor. His parents did not help him much financially. They helped him secure loans and they gave him a place to live, but that was it. He was not in the military. What he did was he got his initial Private Pilot's license in high school. Then he started college (you need a bachelor's to fly with most commericial airlines). After a year or two of college, he took a leave and went to Flight Safety acadamy in FL to get several other ratings. I think he knocked those out in about 9 months and took a loan out to finance it.

It is a hard row to hoe to become a professional pilot. It is a big step ladder. My husband made $16K/year at his first real piloting job (after the flight instructor) as a cargo pilot. Flight instructors make much less, and that is what you have to do to build flight hours.

You have to decide if you want it bad enough, because you will have to make sacrifices for quite a while. Tell your parents that you only want money or gift certificates for flight lessons for all birthdays and christmases, and you save on your own. At 23 years old, there is no reason why you shouldn't be able to afford a few hundred dollars a month to get your PP. Then you can decide if you want to go further with it as a career. You are not the only person whose parents cannot or willnot finance your career. It makes it harder sure, but if you want it bad enough, you can do it.
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Old 11-22-2009, 08:08 AM
 
1,751 posts, read 2,831,070 times
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Thanks so much for your reply. I guess its not really the whole money issue, I don't mind paying for it on my own when the time comes, but the whole it seeming like a waste of time/money to my parents. Its the only thing I'm interested in, so why not support me?
Yes, I am currently in college right now and I have a PT job but I am looking into it more.
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Old 11-22-2009, 08:43 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 92,268,009 times
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I know someone who pursued an online bachelors degree in aviation while working as a CDL truck driver. He secured financial aid and a student loans to cover the cost of the degree and later flight school. While working on his bachelors degree, he saved as much money as he could to cover his living expenses for when he went away to flight school. As for simply pursuing a private pilot licence, that costs between 4k to 8k depending on the school. You could secure a loan for that.

Every boy dreams of being a pilot, fireman, doctor, astronaut, etc., during childhood. It's just wrong for any parent to respond "be serious" when a grade schooler shares those desires even though most children outgrow the phase. I'm sorry that happened to you.

Family support makes a difference, but it's not a guaranteed key to success. Many people pursue their dreams in spite of their families. As a matter of fact, an "I'll show them mentality" can be a powerful motivator.

My sister always wanted to be a writer. She was the year book editor throughout high school. When it came time to go to college, my father insisted that she major in business because he believed she would be a starving artist as a writer. When my sister refused to give up her dream, my father restricted his contribution towards her college education to a minimal amount of money. It took her 6 years to complete her bachelor's degree because she had to work multiple jobs to make up for the difference in what my father wouldn't pay. Within a few years of graduating, she was the editor of a magazine in NYC. My father changed his tune and believed that success is possible with passion.

Turn your disappointment into something positive.
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Old 11-22-2009, 08:53 AM
 
47,573 posts, read 60,617,927 times
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If you're old enough to fly then why do you need your parents to support your hobby? Or are you after them to pay for your passion? What you should do is get a job and pay for your lessons and air time.
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Old 11-22-2009, 08:53 AM
 
Location: Space Coast
1,988 posts, read 4,631,650 times
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Yes, it is difficult when your parents don't support or seem even remotely interetested in one's dreams. Are your parents afraid of flying? Maybe they are just scared that you will get hurt and are trying to dissuade you. If you are an adult and paying for it yourself, then it really is none of their business, but I can understand their worry. I've always just done my own thing, and if it's something my parents didn't approve of, then we didn't discuss it.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:06 AM
 
Location: southwestern PA
20,419 posts, read 37,629,184 times
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IDK...
I think that when you are 23, you are able follow your dreams, and not use your parents as an excuse not to.

They don't support you... so what?
Why is their approval or lack thereof stopping you dead in your tracks?
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:07 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 92,268,009 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post
If you're old enough to fly then why do you need your parents to support your hobby? Or are you after them to pay for your passion? What you should do is get a job and pay for your lessons and air time.
It's clear you didn't even read his entire post! He has a job, and he has been slowly paying for his lessons and air time.

He's sharing how it felt as a child! That type of discouragement carriers over into adulthood.

Although he discusses money, this thread isn't about money. It's about overcoming lifelong discouragement and present day obstacles.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:50 AM
 
47,573 posts, read 60,617,927 times
Reputation: 22283
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
It's clear you didn't even read his entire post! He has a job, and he has been slowly paying for his lessons and air time.

He's sharing how it felt as a child! That type of discouragement carriers over into adulthood.

Although he discusses money, this thread isn't about money. It's about overcoming lifelong discouragement and present day obstacles.
He's 23 years old now. It shouldn't matter whether or not his parents showed a lot of excitement for something he said he wanted to do at age 8, most of us do plan things as little children and it would be silly for parents to get real excited. Especially when an 8 year old says he wants to be a pilot because it's not something an 8 year can do for a number of years. It would be better for the parents to get excited and be supportive of playing softball, or the boyscouts when it's young children.

When you're over 18, you are on your own, you can do whatever kind of hobby you choose and why think parents would have to be the top cheerleaders for it?

It's the same with horses. It's fine that the parents are enthused but so what if they weren't? The girlfriend is also an adult and it shouldn't matter if her parents are into it or not by that time. I can't imagine as an adult to expect my dad to really be very involved in anything I like to do.
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Old 11-22-2009, 09:52 AM
 
47,573 posts, read 60,617,927 times
Reputation: 22283
And - since it's likely our parents have their own hobbies, are we expected to be very supportive of their hobbies? My dad likes old cars and showing them in parades. If I'm in town, I'll go watch but that's about it. He doesn't need me there clapping all the way anymore than I need him clapping whenever I do something I like to do. In fact I have horses and my dad isn't involved in any way with them, horses aren't his thing.
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