How to regain control from kids(?) (method, punishments, wife, chores)

[formercalifornian]

Even as an adult, I rest much easier without television. I used to get really amped up watching the news before turning off the light. Getting rid of television entirely (our household doesn't have one at all) was the best thing that ever happened for my sleeping habits.

That said, adults engage in many activities that children aren't allowed to do, and the kids survive the double-standards.

[Whyte Byrd]

Originally Posted by Momma_bear

I don't think that adults need to comply with every rule set down for their kids. As an adult I can have a tv in my room and turn it off when its time for a bed. If a 5 or 6 year old can't do that, and it affects their well being, then they should not have a tv in their room.

I agree. There are a lot of things adults can do that kids can't. Should we let the kids do them or make the adults stop?

[serate]

Originally Posted by Whyte Byrd

My neices and nephew (ages 5 and 6) have always been allowed to sleep with the tv on--all night. Now, they've been told it's what's disrupting their sleep and possibly contributing to behavioral problems but the parents say 'They won't...." [heavy sigh] Don't get me started, I know, I know. So how would you go about taking back control in this situation? Just turn off the tv and let the engines roar? There's got to be a better way.

Take the TV out of the room. If they can't sleep because of the quiet - I know I can't -turn on a fan or a noise machine.

TV out of the room because besides not falling asleep with it on, Mom & Dad need to monitor what & how much they watch. Can't do it if it's in the kids room.

[Whyte Byrd]

Originally Posted by formercalifornian

Even as an adult, I rest much easier without television. I used to get really amped up watching the news before turning off the light. Getting rid of television entirely (our household doesn't have one at all) was the best thing that ever happened for my sleeping habits.

That said, adults engage in many activities that children aren't allowed to do, and the kids survive the double-standards.

I don't really consider it a double standard, as such, but a necessary one. They learn there are privileges to being an adult and if you show responsibility you could earn some of those privileges sooner--some, not all, of course.

[Whyte Byrd]

Originally Posted by serate

Take the TV out of the room. If they can't sleep because of the quiet - I know I can't -turn on a fan or a noise machine.

TV out of the room because besides not falling asleep with it on, Mom & Dad need to monitor what & how much they watch. Can't do it if it's in the kids room.

They definitely monitor what they can watch. They have the remote and it can't be changed without it. They watch cartoons and children's shows.

[Dragonfly8]

1. Call a family meeting.

2. Ask the kids if they like having a TV in their room. Let them know all the pediatricians say NO TV'S IN KIDS ROOMS!! Tell them you believe they can handle it,,,with a couple of changes that they can choose.

3. Before the meeting, make a decision of when the TV must be off. If this is 8:00, give them a choice of 7:30 or 8:00. (They will probably pick 8:00)

4. Make it clear that the TV comes out of the room if- someone turns it back on after the set time, they whine, pout, complain or behave in a negative manner.

4. Give them the choice- Do you want to have the TV for ___ minutes before bedtime without whining? Or do you you want to take it out of your room now? They want the TV--so now you write up the agreement and all sign it.

Letting them make choices about the "deal" can increase the chance of compliance. Never give them a choice you aren't willing to live with.

OR- take the TV out altogether and play a radio/cd with a sleep timer.

Check out the Love and Logic website for more help.

[formercalifornian]

Originally Posted by Whyte Byrd

I don't really consider it a double standard, as such, but a necessary one. They learn there are privileges to being an adult and if you show responsibility you could earn some of those privileges sooner--some, not all, of course.

Uh, that IS a double standard, which simply means that one group has more options or privileges than another group. Necessity is beside the point.

[Whyte Byrd]

Originally Posted by formercalifornian

Uh, that IS a double standard, which simply means that one group has more options or privileges than another group. Necessity is beside the point.

Ok well I'm more concerned about the kids right now than double standards and semantics but thank you.

[formercalifornian]

Fair enough. My personal view is that nobody, adults included, should have a TV in a bedroom, and I think you are right to be concerned. I doubt you can do anything about it, but, for record, I agree with you that the televisions in the kids' rooms need to go.

[Whyte Byrd]

Originally Posted by Dragonfly8

1. Call a family meeting.

2. Ask the kids if they like having a TV in their room. Let them know all the pediatricians say NO TV'S IN KIDS ROOMS!! Tell them you believe they can handle it,,,with a couple of changes that they can choose.

3. Before the meeting, make a decision of when the TV must be off. If this is 8:00, give them a choice of 7:30 or 8:00. (They will probably pick 8:00)

4. Make it clear that the TV comes out of the room if- someone turns it back on after the set time, they whine, pout, complain or behave in a negative manner.

4. Give them the choice- Do you want to have the TV for ___ minutes before bedtime without whining? Or do you you want to take it out of your room now? They want the TV--so now you write up the agreement and all sign it.

Letting them make choices about the "deal" can increase the chance of compliance. Never give them a choice you aren't willing to live with.

OR- take the TV out altogether and play a radio/cd with a sleep timer.

Check out the Love and Logic website for more help.

I'm more a lay down the law type of parent but this could possibly work. I'll show their parents this. Thank you.