U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 09-13-2007, 04:32 PM
 
Location: Lovelock, NV - Anchorage, AK
1,195 posts, read 4,915,366 times
Reputation: 463

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by BrianH View Post
Comes down to a number of things im afraid.

Back when i was younger, if i spat i got spanked. These days they get talked to or the playstation gets taken away.
If i hurt an animal i was spanked. These days they get talked to or the playstation gets taken away.
If it hit someone first, i was spanked. These days they get talked to or the playstation gets taken away.

Does anyone see the pattern ?

I turned out fine, i respect all living things and enjoy life. Kids these days arent happy it sees unless theyre doing something wrong.

Seems that's the only time they get attention even if it's negative attention.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 09-13-2007, 06:36 PM
 
Location: Chicago 'burbs'
1,022 posts, read 2,979,458 times
Reputation: 720
Quote:
Originally Posted by THASPECIAL View Post
I believe in spanking cuz i was when i was a kid....i think people that dont believe in it and listen to all these psycollogists are the people who didnt understand why thier parent spanked them or they are people who were just spoiled or they just saw the pain as being too hard for them to take......hitting without understanding is wrong, but when you spank your kid and tell him exactly why he got hit and then tell him to not do it again or he will be spanked again and then tell him you love him/her then thats the right thing to do....

when spanking went away what happened to our society? show me stats that say we are better in our way of thinking now.
I was basically told I beat my kids on another topic here because I spank my kids. They don't get spanked for everything they do wrong, but when they do something they know is wrong and are warned, then do it again.... guess what is going to happen? They KNOW why they get spanked and they KNOW what is expected of them. Period. I will not raise disrespectful kids that don't listen and tow the line. I feel it is my responsibility to discipline my kids. Not the schools. I wouldn't complain if they did, though! I just don't think it should be left up to the school. The schools job is to TEACH.


Kids get way too much handed to them. I don't care how much money I have, they aren't going to get handed everything they want. They need to earn it. They earn things by acting the way they are supposed to, doing chores to help out around the house, getting good grades, and contributing to the family and school/community in a positive way.

It all starts at home. My kids are still young still, not yet teens. It matters how they behave now. If they get away with not acting right now, what will they be doing at 13, 16, 18?

We are fair and they know what is expected. We usually don't have any problems. When we do, we sit down and talk about it. Being a parent isn't easy. But I chose to have these kids and it is my responsibility to be sure they don't grow up to be a drag on society. I'd love to see my kids make some positive contribution. I hope they will be strong and not give in to peer pressure. I hope......

Last edited by treeg26; 09-13-2007 at 06:52 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-13-2007, 09:39 PM
 
Location: Moved to town. Miss 'my' woods and critters.
25,463 posts, read 11,975,518 times
Reputation: 31635
Everyone has their preferred method of parenting. I was never spanked and I never spanked my children. My parents, I believe, did an excellent job in the manner in which they responded to any mistakes that my siblings or I committed. We knew, from their teachings, what actions, words, deeds were wrong and which were acceptable. We were taught, 'yes 'mam, no, sir, thank you, may I?, please, you're welcome, etc. There just wasn't any question in our minds how to behave.

This is 'old school' and old fashioned, I know. But, see, my parents stuck by what they said. None of this saying,"how many times do I have to....'. They told us once and meant it. No doubts. No guesses. No games. We knew they were serious. I hear parents/adults now telling children, 'honey, please don't......whatever... and the child 'knows' that they can continue, because said adult will say the same thing over and over...

Plus, parents should be parents, and not attempt to be the child's best friend. It is great to be friendly, but you are not the child, you are THE parent, just what every child needs in order to grow up and be the self sufficient person they are meant to be.

I blame the present situation on many things, but mostly on non-parenting. Sure, throw in some MTV, television, computers, ipods, play stations, xboxes, and other material distractions. But parents are the most important of all in any child's upbringing. Just my thoughts. Oh, by the way, I am far from perfect.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-14-2007, 06:13 AM
 
Location: Salt Lake City, Utah
7,731 posts, read 11,948,319 times
Reputation: 5939
More Teenagers acting out:
ksl.com - Teens Questioned in Connection with House Fires
ksl.com - Students Say Teen Arson Suspects Have a Reputation
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-14-2007, 06:52 AM
 
Location: USA
1,895 posts, read 4,041,277 times
Reputation: 1988
Quote:
according to the police when they have a problem with him, they can't find his parents...
And there you have the problem....teenagers today are no different than they ever were.
The problems start at home - they face much tougher obstacles these days, to be sure - drugs, sex, etc. - but with a firm foundation, it can be done. JMHO
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-14-2007, 08:39 AM
 
Location: Tejas
7,504 posts, read 15,974,639 times
Reputation: 5025
Quote:
Sure..that'll teach 'em...teaching respect by disrespecting them?
Id like to thank the person who broke the rules and gave me neagtive rep because they dont agree with me, and didnt leave their name. Respect.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-14-2007, 10:36 AM
 
Location: huh?
3,099 posts, read 1,915,577 times
Reputation: 498
most of the time it goes back to the parents. there are tons of parents out there that have no clue as to what they are doing and frankly (hard to believe but i think true) do not care. lots of stupid and selfish people out there. also i think the media is to blame. too much violence on tv and in music and video games. it really does sink into the children's brain and they become immune to it's effects.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-14-2007, 10:41 AM
 
Location: huh?
3,099 posts, read 1,915,577 times
Reputation: 498
oh yeah i forgot that kids are waaaay too spoiled these days. they are given way too many posessions ($$$$) and some parents are either too busy working or involved with their own lives that they show their love through gifts OR some parents are too tired (maybe lazy?) to follow through on saying no and give in to the kids. lots and lots of spoiled brats out there that's for sure. never ever good to spoil a person. EVER.
SPOIL WITH LOVE/AFFECTION/TIME SPENT IS GREAT but spoiling with posessions/toys/gadgets along with being too lenient is very very bad.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-14-2007, 10:42 AM
 
Location: Tejas
7,504 posts, read 15,974,639 times
Reputation: 5025
I really cant blame the media. I am, and always have been fascinated by violence. Thats be movies, tv shows, computer games etc. I was always brought up to know its wrong, and to treat people with respect. What saddens me is that you see kids tell people to F&^% off and whatnot and the parents shrug or laugh it off.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-14-2007, 02:39 PM
 
Location: huh?
3,099 posts, read 1,915,577 times
Reputation: 498
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrianH View Post
I really cant blame the media. I am, and always have been fascinated by violence. Thats be movies, tv shows, computer games etc. I was always brought up to know its wrong, and to treat people with respect. What saddens me is that you see kids tell people to F&^% off and whatnot and the parents shrug or laugh it off.
yes but what about all the kids that are exposed to the violence and dont have parents to counter it by telling them "this is wrong, that is wrong, please treat people with respect". so many kids dont have those kind of parents. so when you subject these kids to the violence and sex and crap that is on tv and movies and radio and internet i think some type of "warning: overload" thing happens in their psyche. brian, do you think it's normal to be fascinated by violence? i can understand you getting a cheap thrill from a movie once in a while but anything more than that is probably not good for the soul. violence should actually sicken you. maybe it's a guy thing! im not a guy and im not trying to lecture.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top