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Okay, there are a few threads here about the trials and tribulations of dealing with pre-teen girls....
I have to tell you, read "Queen Bees and Wannabees" . The movie "Mean Girls" (which you should also watch --- more than once!) was based upon this book. At first, I thought it was going to be a novel-type book, but it's not a novel at all. It's packed with great information, ideas, advice, etc... I would urge every parent to read this book!
Yeah, it is a good book. A few years ago I was a Girl Scout leader of 11-13 yr old girls, and some of them were starting to be cliquish...I wished I could require all their moms to read it!