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Old 02-07-2010, 11:51 AM
29,363 posts, read 24,222,246 times
Reputation: 27701


Originally Posted by hutch5 View Post
Thank you Mightyqueen!!! I can't rep you anymore but I wanted to let you know that I really appreciate your words and I definetely agree with your way of looking at the issue.
You are welcome. I'm not an expert or anything, just saw in your post some of the same issues I dealt with. My kid isn't perfect, but she so far has turned out to be a pretty decent person with respect for herself and compassion for others, and that was always first and foremost my goal.
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Old 02-07-2010, 12:52 PM
Location: here
17,626 posts, read 15,526,415 times
Reputation: 14919
Originally Posted by jkcoop View Post
To me, these are things you instill in children as a parent because you want them to grow up being good, upstanding human beings. It can be done completely away from religion. And in my opinion, it should. Kids shouldn't grow up doing something or acting a certain way because that is what their religion says to do, but because they have been taught that it is just the better way to be.

I grew up in a very strict, strict religious environment. Left it in my early twenties. My husband and I are both atheist. We have raised our son (now 16) to be opened minded to all kinds of things - I would never want to influence his views in that way as I was. So he has grown up with no religious background. But we have raised him to be honest, respectful, hard workings, etc. I couldn't be prouder of my son - he is a wonderful young man. Get's good grades, very focused on his future, has a part time job, and can't understand why the other kids his age are so interested in partying and drinking....

You don't need religion to raise a good child. And you don't want to count on religion to raise one either.
I agree. I was raised Christian, and was raised to be considerate, honest, etc. I never felt that being Christian was the reason for for my values. I could be really close to exactly as I am now without religion at all.
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Old 02-07-2010, 04:15 PM
2,893 posts, read 3,725,660 times
Reputation: 1930
Originally Posted by Theliberalvoice View Post
My mom was about to cry when I told her I am an Atheist. My dad told her I was just going through a phase. I am 21.

My Dad said the same thing to me.

Twenty-five years ago.

Heck of a phase.
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Old 02-08-2010, 01:50 PM
6,764 posts, read 14,429,903 times
Reputation: 4487
What is that quote...do not make a window into another man's soul?

I believe in religious freedom. If your child chooses a different religion it is not your responsibility to be mean, rude, insulting or 'dissuade him or her' to rejoin yours.

I think we should not be BORN into a religion, yet choose our own. How can someone tell me the path to salvation I HAVE TO take?

I was raised Catholic till around age 12. Went to Catholic school for 6 years, didn't like it.
I am more of a Protestant in my thoughts/beliefs. I believe being in Catholic school gave me a good foundation in 'morality' but I still cannot say I would follow all their teaching. Many IMO are behind the times. (not here to debate this, however). My son has no religion. Am I a bad parent because of it? I expose him to various beliefs and he can choose his own.

As long as he is respectful of our family he can be whatever he wants.
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Old 02-08-2010, 03:24 PM
25,085 posts, read 9,289,814 times
Reputation: 41611
I think as long as ur kid is not in some cult as someone else said it is probably okay for them to make a choice. However, there are some religions I would have major concerns about. I hope I never have to go through this with my kids. I have already been through so much.. u know childbirth and all of the stuff that comes after.
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Old 02-08-2010, 07:58 PM
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
28,601 posts, read 19,754,123 times
Reputation: 34044
I think any "child" who goes his own way as far as religion goes is only doing what we all should want from our children: somebody who can think for themselves, make informed decision and make their own path in life. Our adult children were raised in the Methodist church but we always told them it was our responsibility to let them explore the many wonderful religions and be available to help them explore and make their own decision. My son is an atheist and my daughter wants to be a missionary. I am proud of them both. Our only rule is to be respectful of all family members, never attrack other's views and try to have open communication. So far it seems to work.
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Old 02-09-2010, 07:19 AM
1,139 posts, read 1,595,577 times
Reputation: 833
As a parent, if your kid walks away from your religion but keeps some of the lessons/morals (e.g. 'The Golden Rule'), then the parent should be proud they instilled something good in their kids.
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Old 02-09-2010, 01:52 PM
Location: Eastern time zone
4,463 posts, read 4,251,548 times
Reputation: 3397
Originally Posted by hutch5 View Post
What worries me of all this is that if they stop belonging to a Christian community they may stop feeding their inner life and spirituality turning in little egocentric consummeristic, superficial human beings.
Spirituality and depth aren't something that belongs solely to Christians. There are as many greedy, shallow people who claim Christianity as there are those who don't-- and if you want to encourage lack of attachment to material things, point them toward Theravada Buddhism.
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Old 02-09-2010, 01:58 PM
Location: Eastern time zone
4,463 posts, read 4,251,548 times
Reputation: 3397
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
To me "alarming" would include religions that request/require you to turn away from your family if they were not a part or if they embraced attitudes or actions that focused on hate. Of course every families definition of "alarming" is different as you indicated.

That's a pretty fair description of alarming. IMO-- though I feel obliged to point out that takes in a big chunk of the major Abrahamic faiths.
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Old 02-09-2010, 02:03 PM
Location: Denver area
17,415 posts, read 13,165,818 times
Reputation: 20678
In this country, in this time, I'd argue with "big chunk"....more like "very vocal" chunk....
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