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Old 02-21-2010, 03:07 PM
 
43,017 posts, read 50,678,504 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hypocore View Post
Thinking of this thread this morning as I read this story:
Train Kills 3 Teen Girls Crossing Florida Bridge - AOL News

I doubt that any of the parents or teens here thought there was anything wrong with what they did and I imagine the heartbreak and regret the parents now have for making that decision to just drop them off at the mall. It won't matter one bit that it is a rare and unusual incident to the parents who lost a child.
This sort of thing could happen by just letting mine out into the neighborhood alone. There are railroad tracks over the hillside from where I live.

We can't keep our teenagers locked up in our houses. The best we can do is teach them common sense. My children KNOW the dangers of the railroad tracks.

I feel badly for the parents who lost their children. But I don't think they should blame themselves for what happened.
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:15 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 2,648,441 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hypocore View Post
Thinking of this thread this morning as I read this story:
Train Kills 3 Teen Girls Crossing Florida Bridge - AOL News

I doubt that any of the parents or teens here thought there was anything wrong with what they did and I imagine the heartbreak and regret the parents now have for making that decision to just drop them off at the mall. It won't matter one bit that it is a rare and unusual incident to the parents who lost a child.
Or the mother could be hit by a drunk driver with her kids in the car.

Or their house could burn down in the night with the family inside.

Or a stranger could knock on the door and kill the whole family.

Or a tornado could come and take the house and all that's inside, including the family.

Or someone talking on their cell phone while driving could plow the mother and kids down while they were walking on the sidewalk.

Or, or, or, or...

Accidents happen. No matter how careful people are, accidents happen. Things happen.

So we should prevent our kids from growing up because something MIGHT happen? Or should we stay inside our homes because something MIGHT happen? Or should we... what, how can we stop all the bad things from happening??? WE CAN'T.

Maybe we should crawl into a shell and never, ever peek out in fear of something bad happening.

Last edited by NoExcuses; 02-21-2010 at 03:24 PM..
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:21 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 2,648,441 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
This sort of thing could happen by just letting mine out into the neighborhood alone. There are railroad tracks over the hillside from where I live.

We can't keep our teenagers locked up in our houses. The best we can do is teach them common sense. My children KNOW the dangers of the railroad tracks.

I feel badly for the parents who lost their children. But I don't think they should blame themselves for what happened.
I never thought I would find myself agreeing with you, but we are on the same page here.
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:26 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 2,648,441 times
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Maybe we should crawl into a shell and never, ever peek out in fear of something bad happening. But then there would be a flood and we would all drown because we couldn't get out of our shells fast enough.

Or someone who is brave and unafraid of bad things would come along and step on our shell and we would be crushed.

Wow, there's just no sure way to stay safe, is there...
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:43 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
22,342 posts, read 17,123,412 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hypocore View Post
Thinking of this thread this morning as I read this story:
Train Kills 3 Teen Girls Crossing Florida Bridge - AOL News

I doubt that any of the parents or teens here thought there was anything wrong with what they did and I imagine the heartbreak and regret the parents now have for making that decision to just drop them off at the mall. It won't matter one bit that it is a rare and unusual incident to the parents who lost a child.
There are no guarantees in life. None of us knows when some, freak, accident may take our lives. If you read the relationship boards, you'll remember that my daughter caught her foot on the bunk bed ladder, a year ago, and ended up with the hook of the ladder impaled through her eye socket. Had it gone in above the eye instead of below, it would have ended up in her brain instead of her sinus cavity. Living your life in fear of everything is not the answer.

I don't think these parents have anything to feel quilty about. In such situations, we'd all wish we had a do over not because we did anything wrong but just because we'd like a different outcome but we don't get them.
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:45 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
22,342 posts, read 17,123,412 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NoExcuses View Post
Maybe we should crawl into a shell and never, ever peek out in fear of something bad happening. But then there would be a flood and we would all drown because we couldn't get out of our shells fast enough.

Or someone who is brave and unafraid of bad things would come along and step on our shell and we would be crushed.

Wow, there's just no sure way to stay safe, is there...
Spending your life fearing that you might die at any moment (which you can), is a wasted life.
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:47 PM
 
2,913 posts, read 4,247,827 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NoExcuses View Post

Or the mother could be hit by a drunk driver with her kids in the car.

Or their house could burn down in the night with the family inside.

Or a stranger could knock on the door and kill the whole family.

Or a tornado could come and take the house and all that's inside, including the family.

Or someone talking on their cell phone while driving could plow the mother and kids down while they were walking on the sidewalk.

Or, or, or, or...

Accidents happen. No matter how careful people are, accidents happen. Things happen.

So we should prevent our kids from growing up because something MIGHT happen? Or should we stay inside our homes because something MIGHT happen? Or should we... what, how can we stop all the bad things from happening??? WE CAN'T.

Maybe we should crawl into a shell and never, ever peek out in fear of something bad happening.
I certainly don't disagree that accidents can and do happen and I agree that we cannot shelter our kids at all times, never said differently.

I was merely relating a story that was a direct relation to dropping kids off at the mall.

The point here is that parents dropped their children off at a place they believe to be safe and the children made a number of bad choices including leaving and then being on a bridge that led to their deaths.

Was this an accident that could not have been prevented like being hit by a drunk or distracted driver or having your house burn down?
No, it was not. It was caused by a domino effect of choices made by the parents and the children and could have been prevented. Of course those parents are going to blame themselves. They certainly cannot blame the train.
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:50 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
22,342 posts, read 17,123,412 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post
This is one reason I don't believe kids need to be dating until at the least 16 but preferrably older.

A child so young isn't ready to handle rejection, they've never done the solo things, or made close friends of the same gender. They're too young for adult type relationships and think they cannot live without the boyfriend or girlfriend.

I would tell her she was too young to be dating and having boyfriends in the first place and it's obvious from the way she's carrying on that she was.
You do realize that "Dating" today is not dating that we did as teens, right? Dating just means you've both admitted you like each other today. "Dating" for my daughter meant he'd come over here and they'd watch a movie or they'd walk to the mall with friends. Dating doesn't involve dates at this point. It involves text messages and phone calls (more messages than calls which is just fine by me because I can read them).
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Old 02-21-2010, 03:57 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
22,342 posts, read 17,123,412 times
Reputation: 11761
Quote:
Originally Posted by hypocore View Post
I certainly don't disagree that accidents can and do happen and I agree that we cannot shelter our kids at all times, never said differently.

I was merely relating a story that was a direct relation to dropping kids off at the mall.

The point here is that parents dropped their children off at a place they believe to be safe and the children made a number of bad choices including leaving and then being on a bridge that led to their deaths.

Was this an accident that could not have been prevented like being hit by a drunk or distracted driver or having your house burn down?
No, it was not. It was caused by a domino effect of choices made by the parents and the children and could have been prevented. Of course those parents are going to blame themselves. They certainly cannot blame the train.
No, this story doesn't relate directly to dropping kids off at the mall. Dropping kids off at a mall doesn't cause kids to be on a bridge when a train is any more than my going to the grocery store would have caused me to be in the path of a run away truck if I died that way. The events are unrelated.

Yes, the parents will wish they had a do over but not because they did something wrong. It will be because they simply want a different outcome. None of us has a crystal ball. How many children have been killed in car accidents after their parents picked them up from school? Is the decision to send the children to school to blame?
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Old 02-21-2010, 04:02 PM
 
Location: Denver area
17,128 posts, read 12,470,991 times
Reputation: 19535
The kids at Columbine easily might have been dropped off by their parents at a place they felt was safe....the kids/young adults at Virginia Tech may have been there on their parent's dime, there were people killed during a church service in Colorado Springs several years ago. I'm sure they felt they were "safe" too. No place is completely safe - no such thing.

Quote:
Yes, the parents will wish they had a do over but not because they did something wrong. It will be because they simply want a different outcome.
Exactly - but apparently I can't rep you again.
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