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Old 05-30-2007, 10:08 PM
 
Location: Chandler, AZ
453 posts, read 1,401,903 times
Reputation: 329

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How old do you have to be so that you don't have to visit with a parent if you don't want to? I am almost 16 years old and don't want to visit with my dad because of prior abuse while at his house. The judge says I have to be 18 but I have to suffer until then? If I fight back when he beats me, he tells the police I hit him, one time almost making me go to a detention home.
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Old 05-30-2007, 10:26 PM
 
Location: Happiness is found inside your smile :)
3,178 posts, read 13,167,269 times
Reputation: 1256
YOu need to go to a school counselor and ask - they will help you

Also go to a domestic abuse resource in your town they can tell you what legal actions you can take to keep yourself safe
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Old 05-31-2007, 01:40 AM
 
Location: Debary, Florida
2,267 posts, read 2,375,648 times
Reputation: 685
I am amazed they are making you continue to go...my 10 year old daughters school counselor called DCF on me for grounding and yelling at my daughter when she had misbehaved...

I would go to your counselor daily...call DCF directly, go to the police, keep talking until someone hears you. If you have marks on your body, take photos, MAKE DCF take photos...
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Old 05-31-2007, 04:55 AM
 
Location: In the sunshine on a ship with a plank
3,413 posts, read 7,834,257 times
Reputation: 2214
Just refuse to go- won't your mother help you with this situation?
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Old 05-31-2007, 06:44 AM
 
Location: Vermont
22 posts, read 76,354 times
Reputation: 16
I would tell your mother and go back to court and explain the abuse that you have suffered and your continued fear of the abuse to come. Most of the country has in effect that at 11 to 14 years old you, as the child can choose which parent you want to live with, since that is the case I would imagine given all the information the court would allow you not to have to visit your father and to force you into that would be wrong on so many levels.
If Kim Bassinger can revoke visitation (temperarily) from Baldwin for a nasty phone call then physical abuse should supercede that.
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Old 05-31-2007, 08:18 AM
 
7,788 posts, read 10,444,975 times
Reputation: 3392
Absolutely, positively TELL SOMEONE in authority: Your mother, a teacher, your guidance counsellor, and keep on going (enlisting other people's help)until you have enough people in your corner to help intervene. It seems to me that if a student approaches a school counselor telling him/her that they are being abused by a parent, that the school counselor is obligated, by law, to 1) document it in writing, 2) report it. I know that is the case in the state I live in. They are called "mandated reporters" and by law must report abuse/claims of abuse to the proper authorities. (DYS, DFS, etc.) Keep on enlisting help from others who are in a position to advocate for you, since you are under 18. It is their job. Good luck. You're a brave soul...

Take gentle care.
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Old 05-31-2007, 12:53 PM
 
Location: Penobscot Bay, the best place in Maine!
1,891 posts, read 5,146,844 times
Reputation: 2627
Quote:
Originally Posted by pirate girl View Post
Just refuse to go- won't your mother help you with this situation?

Yes, this. If you are 16, there "ain't" nobody who is going to pick you up and plop you in a car to go and visit him. Anybody that does would be committing assault, if not kidnapping.

You need to tell someone who is mandated to report child abuse, and keep telling it until someone from the state shows up to listen. You are not being fairly represented, and I know it is hard to stand up for yourself, but you DO have the right to be heard AND PROTECTED.
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Old 04-12-2010, 10:34 PM
 
1 posts, read 4,148 times
Reputation: 11
Im 14 years old, And I have A mother I can't stand to live with. She tricked me into coming to live with her, And I trusted her Because she said she would let me go back after Christmas break to continue living with my father, It's been 4 months now, and Im still not home, I mis it there, and Cry everyday. I know it's not that bad, but my mom Freaks out about everything, And Is making it hard on me here, And when ever I talk about wanting to go home she grounds me. I Also Can't learn at school because All this is going on. So I was Wondering if I could Go back to my father, Without her permission. Because she said I'd have to stay with her untill im 17, and I don't want to suffer that long.
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Old 04-12-2010, 10:52 PM
 
4,805 posts, read 19,559,583 times
Reputation: 4931
Quote:
Originally Posted by it'sSiidenyy View Post
Im 14 years old, And I have A mother I can't stand to live with. She tricked me into coming to live with her, And I trusted her Because she said she would let me go back after Christmas break to continue living with my father, It's been 4 months now, and Im still not home, I mis it there, and Cry everyday. I know it's not that bad, but my mom Freaks out about everything, And Is making it hard on me here, And when ever I talk about wanting to go home she grounds me. I Also Can't learn at school because All this is going on. So I was Wondering if I could Go back to my father, Without her permission. Because she said I'd have to stay with her untill im 17, and I don't want to suffer that long.
No, you probably can't just leave without her permission. That's called running away and its not only illegal its also dangerous!

I don't know what you mean by 'tricked' but merely not liking your parent is the plight of teenagerhood and is not sufficient to overturn a custody arrangement let alone is it a good reason to run away!
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Old 04-12-2010, 10:56 PM
 
Location: A Yankee in northeast TN
9,486 posts, read 13,339,114 times
Reputation: 19904
Talk to your dad or talk to an adult at school. The judge allowed me to choose which parent I wanted to live with when I was only 14. Rules might be different where you live, so talk to someone you trust and get some advice.
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