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Old 02-27-2010, 09:15 PM
 
897 posts, read 2,447,879 times
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I am not strict or really laid back-just right in the middle- My 17 yo daughter asked to go somewhere (driving on interstate) and will be home by curfew-I was hesitant but know she is very responsible- I decided to let her go since she actually asked and could have gone without asking- and will be gone to college in over a year- what would you have done- she texted that she was there-and will text when she leaves- I continue to warn her of other bad drivers...
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Old 02-27-2010, 09:37 PM
 
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My fondest wish, as a truck driver, is that teens be taught to share the road with big trucks and busses...
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Old 02-28-2010, 01:44 AM
 
Location: Hawaii
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Trust her.
We can't be there every minute (God knows I tried anyway).
I nearly broke my right foot while letting my son drive when I was in the car (the imaginary break) I finally had to let him go in his own.
These days they go to driving school and know so much more.
You will never stop worrying about your daughter.
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Old 02-28-2010, 03:31 AM
 
Location: Ohio
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Depends on the kid and their level of maturity and everyday common sense and actions.
Yours showed responsibility by asking. Then texting you when she got there and will text again when she leaves.
That tells me she knows you are concerned and worry about her well being and she cares enough about your concerns to let you know she is ok and to relieve your fears. Sounds like a very well raised daughter who wants the parent to know she can be trusted and has nothing to hide and appreciates your love and returns it by letting you know she is alright.
We all worry about our kids no matter what they do. When they prove they are mature enough to fly on their own, it isn't right to clip their wings.
You did the right thing. And the trust and concern you both have for each other just grew deeper roots because she knows you believe in her.
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Old 02-28-2010, 07:05 AM
 
Location: PA
372 posts, read 1,224,765 times
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Default Going through the same thing...

I can definitely relate to your situation. My daughter got her driver's license just 2 weeks ago. Of course, she wanted to go for a ride to McDonald's immediately after her test - about a 7-8 mile drive from our house. I was a WRECK, but said yes. She was beyond happy!
When she came home, she said something very interesting. She said to me that, when I was in the car with her, she had a tendency to drive faster. However, when she was alone, she was MUCH more cautious about her driving.
I knew right then that she was going to be okay - she GOT IT. She had to be responsible in every action while driving. She knew how important it was to follow the rules, to be defensive, to be a good, safe driver.
I too, ask her when she goes out (which, BTW, usually involves interstate driving, simply because of where we live) to text me when she gets there and when she's leaving to come home. I know that's more for my sanity than for her! I'm not sure if that gets any easier, but I need to keep giving her that freedom and, she knows this, if she messes up, that trust is GONE, car-wise.
I think you did the right thing. Building that trust is key, and letting her go was a great step forward in that department!
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Old 02-28-2010, 07:09 AM
 
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Our oldest has been driving for about a year and a half, our twins start their drivers ed classes in a couple weeks. It is nerve wracking but it gets easier. We had this: Teen Safe Driver in the car for the first year he drove and it was SO nice to have. We will do the same for the twins when the time comes.

As far as driving somewhere on the interstate, well, we live in a large metropolitan area, they learn to drive on the interstate here so for me it isn't any different then driving around town.
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Old 02-28-2010, 07:33 AM
 
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Thanks so much- she made it home and I agree with all that you have said- We just had a wreck with one teen death here a few weeks ago-not a mile from our house- involved water and hydroplaning and it has really scared the parents around here and hopefully all the teen drivers- Sadly -one was killed and one survived- the driver is the survivor-
She is a good driver- she drives on interstate weekly but not at night -I am glad that i let her go and glad that she will tell me- some kids would just go and not tell the parents.
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Old 02-28-2010, 09:55 AM
 
11,642 posts, read 23,817,522 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hlsess View Post
Thanks so much- she made it home and I agree with all that you have said- We just had a wreck with one teen death here a few weeks ago-not a mile from our house- involved water and hydroplaning and it has really scared the parents around here and hopefully all the teen drivers- Sadly -one was killed and one survived- the driver is the survivor-
She is a good driver- she drives on interstate weekly but not at night -I am glad that i let her go and glad that she will tell me- some kids would just go and not tell the parents.
Your last sentence is so true. If they ask us to do something and we say no they can always defy us. Then we don't know what is happening......My son is almost ready to take his driving test.
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Old 02-28-2010, 09:57 AM
 
897 posts, read 2,447,879 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Momma_bear View Post
Your last sentence is so true. If they ask us to do something and we say no they can always defy us. Then we don't know what is happening......My son is almost ready to take his driving test.

My younger one just got his permit... I think so many parents are so controlling it is so sad-One of her friends couldn't go with her last night- she had to go to the symphony with her parents- they don't let her do much at all.
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Old 02-28-2010, 10:50 AM
 
11,642 posts, read 23,817,522 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hlsess View Post
My younger one just got his permit... I think so many parents are so controlling it is so sad-One of her friends couldn't go with her last night- she had to go to the symphony with her parents- they don't let her do much at all.
I don't consider it controlling to insist that a teen accompany the family to something. PLUS-going to the symphony IS DOING SOMETHING.
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