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Old 09-17-2011, 01:15 PM
 
238 posts, read 544,316 times
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a timely thread. thank you.
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Old 10-29-2011, 12:10 AM
 
4,043 posts, read 3,001,508 times
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No, I don't think I would want to know, but I admit am not positive about this. I can't imagine wanting to treat someone as family, maybe too soon just because they were, and yet them being total strangers. I would not know at first what type of person or people they were, and could be taken advantage of.

Kindred spirit is closer than mere blood relative. I think I prefer my very few friends that are as close to me as siblings, but then....I suppose it is a fun and yet strange idea that it could be such a trip to find out this late in life that I had yet another sibling.
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Old 04-01-2012, 09:44 AM
 
1 posts, read 1,187 times
Reputation: 11
I always knew I had 3 half siblings growing up, and never gave much thought about trying to locate them. But 2 years ago, my curiosity got the better of me and I started searching. I have since located all 3 , and have developed a wonderful relationship with one of my half brothers! I have met all of them, and 2 have chosen not to correspond, and I'm ok with that. But one brother and I are very close, and now I couldn't imagine my life without him. In my opinion, I think you should at least try, being prepared for the possibility that they may choose not to respond. But at least you won't go through life wondering what could have been. The relationship we now have was absolutely worth all the pain and heartache I had to get there. His father is my father, and while I have never met him, I don't let that affect what we have. As I see it, we are both innocent victims of his lies and deceit, and there is no reason for us to be apart because of it.
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Old 04-05-2012, 12:23 AM
 
4,043 posts, read 3,001,508 times
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I'm in my mid-fifties. Glad this isn't a possibility in my life. I'd never really thought about your question.

No, I don't think so. No way to know what type of people they are. I just think I wouldn't want to know.
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Old 04-05-2012, 05:38 AM
 
Location: Southern New Hampshire
7,216 posts, read 12,651,511 times
Reputation: 21945
I found out a few years ago that I had a half-sister I had never known about. It has been AMAZING having her in my life. And I am definitely NOT one who thinks that blood lines trump everything else, so for me, it's saying a lot that I wish I had known her growing up.
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Old 04-05-2012, 06:47 AM
 
508 posts, read 1,647,505 times
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I recently found out about 2 half siblings I had and was more than happy to connect with them. Unfortunately, with that inevitably comes drama and confusion, particularly if it involved a divorce in the past.

Won't go through all the details, but you can read about it here:Tough Situation- Should I back off?

Nonetheless- I don't regret connecting with them, and hope that one day in the future we can be much closer and cultivate a stronger relationship. I'd love for them to be an aunt and uncle to my future children one day (I also have a half-sister from my Mom and adoptive father as well-- we grew up together and I don't see her as anything but a sister-- I call my adoptive father Dad as well).

Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
But these siblings are NOT family. Family is people you know, who you have a common background with. I don't know these people. How are they "family" to me? They are nothing, not any more than siblings of sperm donors.
Though, in reality, this is true, when my half siblings reached out to me, who am I to turn them down? Maybe my situation was different as my half siblings are children. Also, it was so strange because both of my half siblings from my bio-father's side look like me! Despite differences in eye and hair color, there's quite a lot of resemblance!
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Old 04-05-2012, 07:53 AM
 
Location: Lehigh Valley, PA
2,311 posts, read 3,605,222 times
Reputation: 5317
I was adopted and found out in 1988 that I had three half sisters.
It was wonderful.
It was indeed a homecoming when I met them for the first time.

I would find it very strange indeed that someone would not want to meet or find their half siblings because after all it is family.
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Old 04-17-2012, 08:29 PM
 
1 posts, read 1,094 times
Reputation: 10
Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
Some things are best left unsaid. If he did not bring it up...then perhaps you should not either.

I suppose I am just not really interested in more family, or connections. At age 50, I just don't see myself calling someone out of the blue, and having this relationship...based on DNA. It just seems very strange to me. What is the point?
I think everyone has to make his or her own decision. My half brother just contacted me (we are both in our 60s). Neither of us knew about the other one (I didn't even know about my dad's earlier marriage). But I am delighted to know about him, and I hope we can have a relationship. Maybe it's because I was an only child......
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Old 04-17-2012, 11:28 PM
 
1,378 posts, read 3,695,301 times
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My parents are both dead, so if I have any half siblings it is unlikely I'll ever learn about them. If I were to stumble across the fact any did exist, I doubt I'd try to contact them and would not feel open to them contacting me out of the blue.
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Old 04-18-2012, 01:11 AM
 
18,852 posts, read 31,694,472 times
Reputation: 26111
There are also unresolved issues regarding half siblings and the relationship of other family members. Did the parent treat all the kids the same? Or were some treated differently?

I still have no desire for a "Dr. Phil" show and all my half siblings. Yes, we are "friends" on Facebook, but I don't see it going further than that.
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