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Old 04-19-2013, 11:35 PM
 
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My guess the mother would have had to put my grandfather's name on the birth certificate, so could he be tracked that way? This would of been in the late 50's.
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Old 04-20-2013, 10:29 AM
 
Location: Southern New Hampshire
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Maybe you could track him that way ... but I am curious as to why you would want to? Is the distant bio connection that important? (I'm not being sarcastic -- I am really curious.)
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Old 04-20-2013, 11:59 AM
 
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And do you think that person would like you prying into his family's background?

Really, a stranger's background is none of your concern. Suppose someone found out that you or a parent were born out of wedlock. Would you like to know that your mother (or grandmother) made a mistake?
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Old 04-20-2013, 12:08 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Padgett2 View Post
And do you think that person would like you prying into his family's background?

Really, a stranger's background is none of your concern. Suppose someone found out that you or a parent were born out of wedlock. Would you like to know that your mother (or grandmother) made a mistake?
I can answer confidently that I would want to know where I truly came from. Whether someone else made a mistake is a sideline. Certainly protecting their finer feelings does not trump my right to know who I actually am, trace my own genealogy, gain new family members, etc.

This must be a generational thing. Hiding shame is no longer in vogue.

As for the OP's situation, I do agree that this is something to think carefully about.
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Old 04-20-2013, 12:21 PM
 
Location: Southern New Hampshire
7,221 posts, read 12,665,713 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rohirette View Post
I can answer confidently that I would want to know where I truly came from. Whether someone else made a mistake is a sideline. Certainly protecting their finer feelings does not trump my right to know who I actually am, trace my own genealogy, gain new family members, etc.
"Protecting the finer feelings" of someone born out of wedlock a couple of generations ago is not as important as "your right to know" about mistakes made decades ago, or your "right" to "gain new family members" (many of whom likely have no desire at all to connect with you)? Wow. I seriously doubt that everyone of your generation (whatever generation that is) would feel the same way.

Personally I don't understand the need to find out about distant biological connections. They have no effect on my life as I live it in 2013. (I do understand genealogy as a hobby, but the idea that we have some "right" to disturb total strangers who may coincidentally be distant relatives is, well, really misguided IMHO. It's incredibly intrusive.)
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Old 04-20-2013, 12:43 PM
 
7,099 posts, read 24,496,068 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rohirette View Post
I can answer confidently that I would want to know where I truly came from. Whether someone else made a mistake is a sideline. Certainly protecting their finer feelings does not trump my right to know who I actually am, trace my own genealogy, gain new family members, etc.

This must be a generational thing. Hiding shame is no longer in vogue.

As for the OP's situation, I do agree that this is something to think carefully about.
"Hiding shame" is still in vogue with a lot of people.

Yes, you have the right to know, BUT, you do NOT have the right to cause other people pain about something that could be devestating to them. Mistakes happen.
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Old 04-20-2013, 12:51 PM
 
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The bio connection is not really that distant, the person would be my dads half brother. I would not just go and call the guy up, but on the other hand what could it hurt to do a few internet searches and browse his facebook?


I could get more info from my grandfather but that would be a bit awkward since he doesn't even know i know about it.
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Old 04-20-2013, 01:11 PM
 
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Suppose you found out that he was serving a life term in prison. Would that make you happy?

Suppose your grandfather found out that you had been snooping. Would that make him like you more? Would he respect you more? And how would your grandmother feel about the situation?
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Old 04-20-2013, 01:29 PM
 
Location: Southern New Hampshire
7,221 posts, read 12,665,713 times
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Originally Posted by Maine7090 View Post
The bio connection is not really that distant, the person would be my dads half brother. I would not just go and call the guy up, but on the other hand what could it hurt to do a few internet searches and browse his facebook?

I could get more info from my grandfather but that would be a bit awkward since he doesn't even know i know about it.
So clearly your grandfather doesn't want you snooping in his business. You'd risk jeopardizing your relationship with him (whatever it is) to find a biological half-uncle just because you are curious? (Honestly, I would be less puzzled by this if it were your FATHER who was interested in finding his half-brother.)

As to what harm it could do: maybe none, maybe a lot. You'd be basically "online stalking" someone who is for all intents and purposes a total stranger to you.

Do you understand what "privacy" means?
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Old 04-20-2013, 02:00 PM
 
10,834 posts, read 14,850,338 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maine7090 View Post
My guess the mother would have had to put my grandfather's name on the birth certificate, so could he be tracked that way? This would of been in the late 50's.
Sent you a direct message.
What is your goal?
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