U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > People Search
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 09-27-2013, 11:24 AM
 
10,834 posts, read 14,843,680 times
Reputation: 5095

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roberta Jennings View Post
Will do that in the future, but that makes a lot of people that are trying to help repeat searches.
We never really know what ANYONE's intentions are in their searches. I mean, so how do YOU decide who to help and who to ignore?
Roberta is correct, posting on the forum does keep everyone somewhat informed on the status. An example would be that, say I post some information that gives clues to others. If Roberta, for example, sees what I posted and she takes that information and finds more, that is a good thing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by katzenfreund View Post
Roberta, you are right, we never do know the REAL intentions. People can say whatever they want here and we have no way of verifying what they are saying.We do not allow the posting of SS numbers or accusations without proof.
Quite of few people asking for help or offering help, in the past, have posted their
phone number or e-mail on the forum. There is no rule against it, but there is a term on the internet called phishing.

If the mod(s) of the forum thinks it is a so-so idea for anyone to post their own phone (or e-mail) maybe that could be considered, and added as just a guideline in the general rules.

Last edited by howard555; 09-27-2013 at 11:45 AM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 09-27-2013, 11:34 AM
 
Location: Little Rock AR USA
2,457 posts, read 6,319,678 times
Reputation: 1869
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roberta Jennings View Post
OK, NY Annie. You are right! That information is off the internet, anyone can get it, but guess I should have DM'd her instead. Will do that in the future, but that makes a lot of people that are trying to help repeat searches. I guess its a good thing I found the wrong person. Don't know how to delete it.

We never really know what ANYONE's intentions are in their searches. I mean, what they tell us could be a bunch of bull, so how do YOU decide who to help and who to ignore? I'm asking in all sincerity.
Help? For me it is a judgment call, some I do and many I don't. I have no particular "base-line".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-27-2013, 03:37 PM
 
Location: florida
1,611 posts, read 1,947,126 times
Reputation: 2008
I myself will post it on here if I get it from the white pages. The things I find elsewhere I send to the Op in a DM. I only use the direct message on here.I don't send to the Op's emall address nor do I call anyone. Like Slim said it's a judgment call.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-28-2013, 06:05 AM
 
270 posts, read 314,335 times
Reputation: 484
Thanks everyone! I DO sometimes find a lead from someone else's post, so that really helps when I know what information others have found. As you said, I guess it is a judgement call. :-)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-28-2013, 09:48 AM
 
Location: florida
1,611 posts, read 1,947,126 times
Reputation: 2008
Roberta You do great work.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2013, 05:59 AM
 
270 posts, read 314,335 times
Reputation: 484
Thanks, MrBill! :-)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-29-2013, 12:21 PM
 
260 posts, read 798,211 times
Reputation: 369
The post made me wonder also why she wanted to find him. About 17 years ago I had a woman contact me on AOL and asked me if I knew a woman who lived in my town. She had the same last name as I did. She said she wanted to find the woman to give her some things that belonged to her deceased father. I found the woman she was looking for in about 10 minutes and had a phone #. I called the woman and told her who was looking for her and why and asked if I could give out her #. She said of I'd love to hear from her. Everyone was happy in the end. Had she been a stalker it could have had a different ending.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 09-30-2013, 09:33 PM
 
Location: southwest TN
8,225 posts, read 14,927,129 times
Reputation: 14983
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roberta Jennings View Post
OK, NY Annie. You are right! That information is off the internet, anyone can get it, but guess I should have DM'd her instead. Will do that in the future, but that makes a lot of people that are trying to help repeat searches. I guess its a good thing I found the wrong person. Don't know how to delete it.

We never really know what ANYONE's intentions are in their searches. I mean, what they tell us could be a bunch of bull, so how do YOU decide who to help and who to ignore? I'm asking in all sincerity.


I specifically was asked why I was concerned about the info posted. As many have said, it's a judgment call. But the OP posted 2, not 1, request for different men. The information she had was sketchy at best and could have been provided by someone in a chatroom or a meetup type group. It just didn't sit well with me. She didn't say they'd gone to school together or worked together or were neighbors, only that she only knew the FIRST name, not the last name, no relationship, no details on children's names, etc. That's why I didn't help.

Then, the info was posted about a different person, not the same first name. Now, in a chat room, using a capital "i" for "L" because that name was already taken could have accounted for it. But everything about the man was posted, including his wife's name. Now, I am not jealous and my husband talks to many women (as well as men) online.

But what concerned me about that info was that it wasn't the same name and it would have been easy to call him - leave a message and have the wife hear it. She might or might not have concerns or issues and here is this woman from years ago supposedly trying to track down her husband. Why?

I'm not saying the OP was looking for a long lost love, what I'm saying is that she didn't provide any info to indicate otherwise.

So I thank you - on behalf of that man and his family - for pulling that post.

By way of further explanation, I have helped people to find details on lost loved ones and will continue to do so. But I once posted a seemingly innocuous piece of information that caused an innocent person much angst - and I have never forgotten that lesson - or forgiven myself. It was a slip, similar situation to this, not enough info and I was too eager to help.

It's all subjective and that's how I make my judgment call.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 10-01-2013, 06:17 AM
 
270 posts, read 314,335 times
Reputation: 484
Thanks NY Annie! Good lesson to learn! I'll remember it!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-14-2014, 08:57 AM
 
Location: NYC
2 posts, read 8,850 times
Reputation: 14
Smile reply to sandrasony

Quote:
Originally Posted by sandrasony View Post
I tried everything. I don't have a last name for him, that makes it harder to find information. I wish there was something I could do to find him.
sandrasony:
have you tried cross-referencing? do you know any acquaintances of his that you could find/contact?
in the neighborhood where he lived or places that he frequented? Contact those places of business.
I hope its good news you are bringing him, like wanting to give him a share of your lottery jackpot. cheers!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > People Search
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top