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Old 03-09-2012, 07:54 AM
 
Location: Chicago
3,068 posts, read 5,318,142 times
Reputation: 3544

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Hello,

I recently was approached by my grandma. She chose me as the one to be the executor of her estate. I was very honored that she would think highly enough of me to handle such a large task, but I know that I am probably best for the job. My mom isn't really responsible with her own finances, and my sister is too sheltered to have any sort of financial knowledge.

I told my grandma no problem because I want to fulfill her wishes. I looked up what the executor does and it seems like a pretty big deal and a lot of headaches. I am wondering if any of you have any PRO-Active advice that I can give her to make things easier on me? Also, any advice or lessons that might help me once I am given the task of handling her assets.

If it matters, she is married to my grandfather, his health is declining and I dont see him out living her. She is also fairly young (67) so she has a lot of time hopefully. Im 23.

Thanks for your help!
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Old 03-09-2012, 08:00 AM
 
7,099 posts, read 24,491,677 times
Reputation: 7302
you need to at least meet her lawyer. If anything should happen to her soon, your address, etc. should be available to him. Also, if he is elderly, and might go before she does, is he with a large firm?
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Old 03-09-2012, 08:07 AM
 
Location: Chicago
3,068 posts, read 5,318,142 times
Reputation: 3544
Quote:
Originally Posted by Padgett2 View Post
you need to at least meet her lawyer. If anything should happen to her soon, your address, etc. should be available to him. Also, if he is elderly, and might go before she does, is he with a large firm?
No, he was a union worker at McCormik place. He gets a pension and social security. I am not sure if there is any life insurance or anything.

My grandma wondered as well if I would be required to meet with her lawyer. She hasn't gotten back to me at all, but I assume I will hear from her soon. Thanks for the reply.
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Old 03-09-2012, 08:08 AM
 
Location: Simmering in DFW
6,948 posts, read 19,455,657 times
Reputation: 7208
the more detailed her will is, the easier it is for the executor. The disposition of her personal belongings woild likely cause the most stress because, unless there are specific instructions, the executor will have to make decisions about those matters. My sisrer died with mo will. She was a widow with no children so my own mother was the natural beneficiary. I handled everything and acted as the executor. My sister was very close to being a hoarder and I made many decisions about the disteibution of her belongings. My mother just wanted it taken care of. But now, years later, I still get criticsized about decisions I made as far as giving her belongings that no one in the family wanted to her friends and charity
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Old 03-09-2012, 08:11 AM
 
Location: Chicago
3,068 posts, read 5,318,142 times
Reputation: 3544
Quote:
Originally Posted by Squirl View Post
the more detailed her will is, the easier it is for the executor. The disposition of her personal belongings woild likely cause the most stress because, unless there are specific instructions, the executor will have to make decisions about those matters. My sisrer died with mo will. She was a widow with no children so my own mother was the natural beneficiary. I handled everything and acted as the executor. My sister was very close to being a hoarder and I made many decisions about the disteibution of her belongings. My mother just wanted it taken care of. But now, years later, I still get criticsized about decisions I made as far as giving her belongings that no one in the family wanted to her friends and charity
ugh, that sounds awful. My grandma gave me full rights to claim anything I wanted from her first. She offered me the opportunity to call for things first. I really didn't want to be greedy, shes got a nice 60' LED and other expensive items. What did I choose? An old school Nintendo.

I will have to sit down and talk with her about what she plans for everything and how detailed she is going to get. Thank you!
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Old 03-09-2012, 10:10 AM
 
7,099 posts, read 24,491,677 times
Reputation: 7302
Good idea ! Talk to her and make a list (that can be changed easily if she decides to) of the plans right now. If something sounds as if it might be a bother.....get her ideas.

One thing you might want to think about. When my mother moved to a NH, her furniture, etc. had to be gotten rid of so I could rent her house. I had gotten what I wanted. There was an organization in town that tried to get stuff for the folks that were in need. I told them that they could have anything they wanted, just be sure that they took EVERYTHING, whether they wanted it or not. They decided it was worth the trouble, brought a bunch of people and cleaned out the whole house! Furniture, dishes, clothes, EVERYTHING!
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Old 03-09-2012, 10:26 AM
 
470 posts, read 554,345 times
Reputation: 852
Default Will should have power of attorney, living will also

My father died without a will in an accident and before he thought about a will. I have had a will since I turned 50 YO, as well as power of attorney and living will (for last wishes as far as healthcare) -- these things were recommended by my attorney. Your grandmother needs to think about those things, too. It's kinder for the family who has to make the final arrangements. She also can specify her wishes as far as her funeral, if she wants one, and the details. I haven't gotten that organized, yet, though

Some people really have a hard time making these decisions for themselves, but it's a loving thing to do that. You are right, it is an honor for her to choose you.
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Old 03-09-2012, 10:58 AM
 
48,516 posts, read 83,901,398 times
Reputation: 18049
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChiGuy2.5 View Post
Hello,

I recently was approached by my grandma. She chose me as the one to be the executor of her estate. I was very honored that she would think highly enough of me to handle such a large task, but I know that I am probably best for the job. My mom isn't really responsible with her own finances, and my sister is too sheltered to have any sort of financial knowledge.

I told my grandma no problem because I want to fulfill her wishes. I looked up what the executor does and it seems like a pretty big deal and a lot of headaches. I am wondering if any of you have any PRO-Active advice that I can give her to make things easier on me? Also, any advice or lessons that might help me once I am given the task of handling her assets.

If it matters, she is married to my grandfather, his health is declining and I dont see him out living her. She is also fairly young (67) so she has a lot of time hopefully. Im 23.

Thanks for your help!
I have been the excecutor before and its really just settling the afairs of the deceased and doig what she wished in will or what she tells you her wishes are. Do not wait until the last minute to find a atrtorney if your family doesn't have one you trust is my ony advise.
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Old 03-09-2012, 11:51 AM
 
297 posts, read 642,396 times
Reputation: 304
Banks will not accept a power of attorney.

Best is to have a will. And to designate beneficiaries for bank accounts, life insurance, investment accounts, and IRA accounts.

Keep in mind your grandma will not be around when you need to get busy! With that said, have her keep a copy of her will at home and original in safe deposit box. And also duplicate copies listing ALL bank accounts, investment accounts, life insurance, IRA's, etc.

Where account is at - address, city, state, zip, phone, account number(s). If beneficiary designated and who. Address of life insurance company, how much, beneficiaries designated, etc.

Have her tell you WHERE this information will be kept.

Basically some of these will not talk to you if you are not the designated beneficiary.

If the estate is over 1 million, she should go to a CPA and do some estate planning.
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Old 03-09-2012, 12:06 PM
 
Location: South Jersey
819 posts, read 2,837,415 times
Reputation: 1444
I really wish my mother thought of this stuff. She passed on 2/19 and now I'm left to handle everything. It's a horrible feeling to know that I have to go through her things and not know how she wants things to be.
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