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Oh, for crying out loud! Just put it in a Swiss bank account, already! Problem solved.
Money that stays on the bank account "melts" over time. But that's not the point - many states/countries can still demand the other person to give a an half of ALL assets/savings, including the unused assets/savings that were accumulated before marriage, thus you'll be forced to keep that account in secrecy because the other party will may still be entitled to take half of that money (and you'll effectively be breaking the law by concealing your assets).
It's interesting how it's more acceptable for you to break the law than to do what a responsible person SHOULD do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Exactly. The average joe has nothing to fear, because he has nothing to lose. He shouldn't marry anyone he has to fear, anyway.
This sounds so much like the "ordinary working-man" rhetoric. I'll just add that this rhetoric also accompanied the attitude that "enemy never rests/sleeps".
By the way, I'd say that split of assets hits you more if you have a single home than when you own several estates. Many legislations also have "equitable ways of division of assets" and other creative ways that actually help the richest folks to minimize their losses while the less affluent folks are usually left without anything because of the "creative interpretations" by judges and the ways the division of assets are handled.
Just to let you know, there are plenty of legislations that actually create homeless people and disinherit the future generations because of the ways the property is handled. A growing number of countries/states will DEMAND that the other spouse is to be repaid upon marital split. This practice is what attributes the growing trend of so-called "feminization of poverty".
This is applied in a growing number of states and countries and it's not a joke. Just hear what the ex wives say about it (California is one of these places as well). Women who live in countries where property ISN'T mandated to be split cannot fathom the issues of divorce since the property is nominally split but the other party cannot sell it at least until kids are grown up. Women who live in countries or states where legislation MANDATES the other spouse to be paid out have figured out how legislators created not just poverty among their generation, but also a generation of disinherited children - since their parents had very little assets to leave behind them. It's a deliberate way that claims to address "issues of husbands", but it's just anther ploy for lawyers and the main interest is that it benefits lawyers. No man wants his wife to inherit the whole house - but no man wants his children to lose a home that he worked for his whole life either.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mikala43
It's hilarious. Many women have significantly higher assets then men... most of us are working, own our own homes, have 401(k)s, stock portfolios, pensions........
I really, really would want to know what this guy thinks he has that so many women are after it.
OP, if I married you (hell freezing over and all that), I'd need you to sign a prenup.
Prenups are to protect both parties, and I really don't want your xbox.
If I wrote this kind of stuff to any forum member, I'd be on a "cooling off" session, but it's not surprising of you to use this kind of posting.
Anyways, back to the topic. Would you sign a prenup in your case if a guy had an xbox and you had a home and savings and your life in line? I'd really love to hear that but I'm inclined to think that you wouldn't even give him a second look based on the fact that he has and plays on his xbox, not just that he has low assets.
If you're serious about the "forever" aspect, why would you need a legal hold onto a man's assets? And men, why would you marry a woman of lesser income without a prenup knowing that they would not do the same for you? The sexist family court system hurts the average man more than it hurts the top 10%.
Are we talking about cases with significantly unequal income, assets, debt, or financial priorities between partners? Those are the cases in which it makes the most sense to have a prenup. If I had $50,000 in savings and was marrying someone who is $50,000 underwater on their home, how should I protect myself from being used as a bailout package?
Nitpicking here, but I don't know about "most of (us) own our own homes". That said, if I married a woman who made/owned more than me, I'd fully expect to sign a prenup. I wouldn't be complaining about her "not trusting me" and questioning their commitment to the marriage by doing so like some women around here (and maybe men, idk).
Regarding the rest....assumptions are just as ugly coming from both genders. While the tone of the post could suggest that he doesn't own much, you don't come out looking very well by implying he doesn't.
It's a side effect of seeing it happen frequently, which of course it doesn't mean it applies to this OP.... just that it probably does.
Never know on the simple basis that he never answered any of the questions I asked him. You see that happen a lot too. They just want to stand on a soap box, they don't want to actually have a discussion.
Frequently the poster ends up admitting he hardly ever dates, and has no actual first hand knowledge (himself/family/friends), but has read that it's a problem on the internet.
You have to ask what the point of his post is? Listen, if someone wants a prenup..... don't get married unless you have one.
It really is that simple. Say 50% of women say no to prenups..... that leaves 50% for him to find the one.... that's a lot of single chicks to date and find your mate.
Now if the guy stated that EVERYONE should get a prenup, then ok! That's a good topic. But GUYS need one, because evil gold diggers are after your money!
That's just stirring the pot. Not saying there are NOT gold diggers out there, there is every kind of person out there, male and female.
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They just want to stand on a soap box, they don't want to actually have a discussion.
Frequently the poster ends up admitting he hardly ever dates, and has no actual first hand knowledge (himself/family/friends), but has read that it's a problem on the internet.
There's gotta be a way of weeding out OP-posters who start a topic or rant based solely on some blog they read. The relationship forum's mainly for helping people with person issues, isn't it? If an issue isn't directly relevant to one's life, why post? Oh well. Good for the mods for moving this one to Economics.
There's gotta be a way of weeding out OP-posters who start a topic or rant based solely on some blog they read. The relationship forum's mainly for helping people with person issues, isn't it? If an issue isn't directly relevant to one's life, why post? Oh well. Good for the mods for moving this one to Economics.
I really don't get the point to people who post stuff like this.
It's a free society, if you want it, it's yours to get. Not everyone will agree with you, but it's still your choice whether to stay with them if they are against it.
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at this point, if i were to get married, i wouldnt have much in the way of assets to protect. but i suppose it helps to be proactive in case i hit the big time(yah right in this economy?). but marriage? not for me. any girl who would get mad about asking for a prenup obviously has an ulterior motive of some sort. the same is true on the flip side. unless the both of you are dirt poor trailer-dwellers & buying cigarettes with cases of coca-cola in appalachia. then you really have nothing to lose.
yeah, i'll get or agree to a prenup. if we split, you can get my beat-up 1999 honda accord with the paint coming off and my old crt tv without a remote, and my green day poster.
I actually know someone who ended her engagement because of a prenup. She was marrying into a very very wealthy family and they wanted her to sign an agreement that paid her a flat $100k per ten years they were married, gave him full custody of any children, and had an adultery clause but only for her. This from a guy who expected her to stay home and raise their future children and who was worth hundreds of millions.
On the other hand I think most prenups make sense. My husband and I had about a thousand dollars between us when we got married so no prenup needed. But we did sign a post nuptial agreement a few years ago that just agrees to split assets 50/50. We signed it as part of our wills and trust but we asked for it so that I could more feel secure in giving up my career to stay at home with our kids.
at this point, if i were to get married, i wouldnt have much in the way of assets to protect. but i suppose it helps to be proactive in case i hit the big time(yah right in this economy?). but marriage? not for me. any girl who would get mad about asking for a prenup obviously has an ulterior motive of some sort. the same is true on the flip side. unless the both of you are dirt poor trailer-dwellers & buying cigarettes with cases of coca-cola in appalachia. then you really have nothing to lose.
yeah, i'll get or agree to a prenup. if we split, you can get my beat-up 1999 honda accord with the paint coming off and my old crt tv without a remote, and my green day poster.
Not really mad so much as flabbergasted at the narrowness of the OP's thinking. Like I said, I would want one... lots of women do. Especially now that women earn more than ever and people marry later than before (which means more years to build wealth). I have a lot of assets in stocks, bonds, mutual funds, and real estate that I want to protect--especially after being burned in a divorce to a man who had a negative net worth when I married him and who tried to go after pre-marital assets of mine. Learned once the hard way.
at this point, if i were to get married, i wouldnt have much in the way of assets to protect. but i suppose it helps to be proactive in case i hit the big time(yah right in this economy?). but marriage? not for me. any girl who would get mad about asking for a prenup obviously has an ulterior motive of some sort. the same is true on the flip side. unless the both of you are dirt poor trailer-dwellers & buying cigarettes with cases of coca-cola in appalachia. then you really have nothing to lose.
yeah, i'll get or agree to a prenup. if we split, you can get my beat-up 1999 honda accord with the paint coming off and my old crt tv without a remote, and my green day poster.
Not mad. Perplexed.
Not even sure what the problem is.
So... perhaps...irritated at a big bruhaha over nothing. Probably more irritated at turning it gender oriented when it really shouldn't be. Nothing new. A lot of threads cause that reaction in me.
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I'm a female and *I* would be the person who is asking for a prenup. Why? Because I will be going into the marriage with a house and more assets to come. I don't mind marrying somebody below or above my social class as long as in case of a separation, we each both walk away with what we had before the relationship and hopefully a little more on both ends.
I don't agree to prenup where the spouse walk away with nothing from the income that was earned inside the marriage. Oftentime, one spouse (male or female) will give his or her job to give childcare or do housekeeping for his/her family. What's the price of the daycare/nanny/housekeeper/surrogate mother/egg donor/sperm donor? Is the spouse who sacrifice his/her career is to get nothing once the marriage is over after giving quality time and service to his/her family? That's simply not fair. Even if they were to go back to the workforce later, their skills may be considered obsolete or they're considering lacking experience since they put their career on hold. That's why legal system requires spousal support.
Last edited by EggWaffle; 05-14-2014 at 10:51 PM..
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not for me. any girl who would get mad about asking for a prenup obviously has an ulterior motive of some sort. the same is true on the flip side. unless the both of you are dirt poor trailer-dwellers & buying cigarettes with cases of coca-cola in appalachia. then you really have nothing to lose.
