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Yeah or you can realize that your children are YOUR problem and no one else's (that includes your own parents).
Again.. this is a difference in culture. These attitudes can be seen as symptomatic of a weak family structure.
In my culture, the elders are involved not for their children alone.... but the family as a whole. Utmost respect in the reverse. My 98 year old grandmother (mother side) back in the Philippines lives in her nice home taken care by 10 of our family members of various generations.... she lives her last years very comfortably and never had to worry about retirement. Here? We throw them into a nursing home and pay someone else to take on the burden. Heck, we even expect them to pay for it out of their own retirement... assuming they have any.
But
You are acting like I am expecting it. Please read my previous posts and take head of the context. Especially from the context of assistance outside of a pure financial one to offset the cost of daycare.
PS> Even among siblings and cousins, we show respect accordingly. I am the first son of the eldest sibling on my father's side. Even though it seems foreign to me, all of my cousins and my brother greet me with "Manong". We are expected to help each other out in times of need... regardless of whether we get along. This is especially true among siblings. Its a strong family oriented culture. But that's besides the point....
In many cultures (I'd say in most other than here in the US were families tend to be spread apart), this is quite normal and very common. In many cultures, there are always several generations living under the same roof. The middle aged parents run the farm/business while the grandparents remain to look after the children. The entire family as a whole take care of the elderly.
I found this to be common in the Philippines (which I am), Indian, and Latino cultures. I would surmise common across most of the planet but I've only met those examples personally.
My father was just on his roof the last season repairing it. He's not "elderly". None of the grandparents are "elderly".
I guess US grandparents are inferior?
Of course, things are different in the US... the family unit is not as strong or close. Father is 1 of 11 and mother is 1 of 9. I am 1 of 2 with a 14 year gap. My wife is 1 of 1. Children are not expected to take care of their parents... why would the opposite be expected?
Life expectancy in the Phillipines is a full ten years shorter than that in the US. Also, I doubt that Filipino grandparents are doing full time babysitting (which is what we were discussing) for the offspring of (in your family's case) 9 or even 11 adult kids. And finally, when you have that many adult kids, taking care of elderly parents (who only live on average to age 68) is a lot easier because the responsibilities are shared by so many people.
So no - I don't think it boils down to US grandparents being "inferior" - whatever that means to you.
By the way, my husband and I are grandparents. I just painted three rooms with ten foot ceilings by myself in a matter of days, and my husband works on site in the oil and gas industry, so I wouldn't call us "elderly" or physically inferior - but I would call us "very busy with our lives."
I love my grandchildren immensely and of course if there was an actual need, I'd babysit them (and I often babysit them out of sheer enjoyment of their company). But I wouldn't agree to full time babysitting for years on end - I would expect the able bodied adult parents of those children to take on the bulk of the responsibility of their own children - just as I did.
Life expectancy in the Phillipines is a full ten years shorter than that in the US. Also, I doubt that Filipino grandparents are doing full time babysitting (which is what we were discussing) for the offspring of (in your family's case) 9 or even 11 adult kids. And finally, when you have that many adult kids, taking care of elderly parents (who only live on average to age 68) is a lot easier because the responsibilities are shared by so many people.
So no - I don't think it boils down to US grandparents being "inferior" - whatever that means to you.
By the way, my husband and I are grandparents. I just painted three rooms with ten foot ceilings by myself in a matter of days, and my husband works on site in the oil and gas industry, so I wouldn't call us "elderly" or physically inferior - but I would call us "very busy with our lives."
I love my grandchildren immensely and of course if there was an actual need, I'd babysit them (and I often babysit them out of sheer enjoyment of their company). But I wouldn't agree to full time babysitting for years on end - I would expect the able bodied adult parents of those children to take on the bulk of the responsibility of their own children - just as I did.
You missed my point. Reread.
PS> You also have children earlier and the family lineage in a single locale is longer. But that's besides the point.
Hilarious article. If this is the reason he offers for having kids, then there is really no reason to have it. It is self explanatory.
your kids will grow up to be jsut like all the other adults in this country today. Terribly entitled, whining, etc. I have to say it is a depressing thing to think about.
There are a few things you kids need to realize about adulthood. You can do all you can to prepare for the future, but don't be shellshocked when things don't always go as planned. Spoken from experience, when I was in my 20s, I had a vision about things I wanted to do and things turned out quite the opposite. Another thing: life is a journey and you never stop learning.
One. You can save more efficiently. Saving is great, but by the time you can use that money, it will buy far less. Consider investing instead. Two. You have more time to better your skills and employment , which leads to greater earning potential. Learn as many trades as you can and you will be valuable. You also need to remain flexible so you're able to roll with the punches life brings. Three. You have a whole lot more leisure time to focus on fitness and quality of life, which then save healthcare cost. Put that down craft beer and throw away your marijuana. You may enjoy your vices now, but once you reach middle age, you will regret those choices when it takes a toll on your health. Four. You are less stressed, sleep in everyday, quiet weekends, long breakfasts, and more time socializing with friends. It increases your happiness. Ditto Five. You may be able to take more vacations and travel, which refreshes you and recharges your battery. Save money and go camping instead. You won't feel like camping anymore when you hit 30-something/middle age.
your kids will grow up to be jsut like all the other adults in this country today. Terribly entitled, whining, etc. I have to say it is a depressing thing to think about.
This is interesting to think about. I wonder how Mr Money Mustache's kid will turn out? With both stay-at-home parents raising him in a frugal lifestyle where free experiences outside are highly valued, I would hope he would grow up unentitled, but I guess you can't know for sure.
But I think it all starts with not giving your kids everything they ask for. That's what my parents did, and I like to think I came out unentitled, though of course that's a biased evaluation. But I see all of these parents (particularly in my area) buying their kids all these iPads/ etc. to babysit their kids while they spend time at work or anything other than with their kids. Then they wonder why kids grow up the way they do.
This is why, if I do have kids, I will act like MMM - no kids until my 30's when I am financially independent and no longer need to work for income. Then I can devote all my time to raising them. Anything less and they might get caught up in the entitled, materialistic culture of our world today that is strong enough to corrupt most anyone.
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But I see all of these parents (particularly in my area) buying their kids all these iPads/ etc. to babysit their kids while they spend time at work or anything other than with their kids. Then they wonder why kids grow up the way they do.
