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If the account isn't held jointly or in a trust -- and Halloran says such lack of planning is the case more often than not -- the account becomes off limits until the estate is settled in a court proceeding. In the meantime, a judge may issue a letter to allow an executor or administrator of the estate access to the account, but only to pay so-called "last expenses" (e.g., funeral costs).
The laws of some states allow a financial institution to pay from a deceased customer's account the funeral and medical expenses directly to the provider of the services. The provider is required to submit the expenses for payment to the institution and the maximum amount of payment is prescribed by the statute.
Yes. Trying to figure out how to respond. So far, my "response" has been going to the library and picking up a bunch of books about long term care, planning your estate, an AARP book about ageing and a guide for adult children on how to communicate with their ageing mother.
Yes. Trying to figure out how to respond. So far, my "response" has been going to the library and picking up a bunch of books about long term care, planning your estate, an AARP book about ageing and a guide for adult children on how to communicate with their ageing mother.
All good in my opinion. Knowledge is power.
Also, pay $200 or whatever for an hour long consultation with an estate attorney. Best money you will ever spend.
Also, pay $200 or whatever for an hour long consultation with an estate attorney. Best money you will ever spend.
Absolutely. But I'm treating this just like our finances. Our first time setting up a portfolio I didn't even know what a mutual fund was much less my desired asset allocation and I just blindly followed our financial advisor... it turned out "okay", but really, once I read a couple books I quickly realized she was guiding us to some products that I didn't want (or need)... it'll take me 2 years to correct (as to avoid short term gains tax).. not a complete mess, but if only I had done the reading BEFORE going into see a professional...
So live and learn.... I need to be familiar with the basic lexicon and general organizational components involved in estate planning before I see or talk to anyone -including my mom- so I can be more effective at helping her. So for everything that was said earlier in this thread... thanks! You guys made me realize just how far I have to go
Well, it's very complex. We're meeting with a financial team this coming Friday (CPA, attorney, financial advisor) regarding my mother in law's estate. This will be our second meeting. This sort of thing takes a lot of thought and planning. And I agree that we need to keep reading, keep researching, keep asking questions and demanding accountability from those professionals who are being paid to HELP us meet our goals.
I think you have a duty to help.
Sounds like your help maybe rejected.
Sounds like she is not financial responsible so even though she is rejecting the help you should push a little harder but at some point you should back off. Guess that is the problem.
If she does everything through a lawyer I guess you are saying there is enough money to cover this without hurting her financially. If you go this route I think she would be wasting her time/money so I would say you go to all the meeting etc and make sure problems are getting solved.
If not attorney I would try and work on her getting one document at a time resolved. The trust that was set up as part of the divorce should be the first item. Ask her for all the divorce paper work and see what it says about the trust. You should also be able to go to the court house and get copies. The trust may or may not be included in the court house paper work but it has to be referenced. I would expect that her divorce attorney has a copy. Ask the attorney to send a copy to your mother. By the way a trust would be filling state and federal tax returns and sending your mother paper work on what she is to include in her tax returns each year. Take a look at her tax return and you should be able to find the address of the trust. (probably easier to start with the tax return)
Get her to create a power of attorney, health directive and a will. Maybe when working on these she will start to let you in on the finances.
You do have a big problem.
If you have not covered estate and retirement planning for yourself you should start educating your self now. Let your mom know you are working on it and ask her advice on what to do. This might help her open up a little more or maybe see the problems she has.
By the way 62 is young and you might have to cover 30 or 40 years of living expense. Also check SS. If she was married for more than 10 years she can collect on his account. You do not need his cooperation and it does not reduce his benefits.
When to collect is an important decision so do some research.
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