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Early retirement is a premature road to death. There's been countless studies on this. Once you stop stimulating your brain and body and have no coherent purpose for your life, the body responds and begins to shut down. You can have it!
As LowerExpectations pointed out, you're made a suspect correlation here. Not everyone relies on their job or some long term goal for physical, social, and mental stimulation.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eliza61nyc
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I did not educate my children so they can take care of me when I'm old. ... Amen... BTDT for 32 yrs myself!
Now every kid is different so there is no golden rule on what makes a good parent. (while I am deemed a 'crummy parent'... it was nice to walk down the college graduation the same year as my kids. We all had the gold ropes (Magna) so while deemed a failure by some... seemed to work out OK for us.
For my husband and myself, when we decided to have children we took that responsibility seriously.
100% homeschooling constituted a 100% commitment 24x7 from us for 12 yrs (Not taken lightly. careers put on hold for our kids They are GONE soon enough) ...
Now since all the careers that my children aspired to needed a college degree, that decision was easy. We can argue the feasibility or the value of higher education until the cows come home. as of Nov 2018 most jobs are asking for college graduate. ... Mine too, they have great professional positions (they paid 100% and dedicated 100% (since they were paying)... they can also 1) work several skilled positions ($80k - $120k) or build their own homes, furniture, and rebuild their cars with skills we invested in them. They owned their own companies before age 18
lastly, from looking around I find that ensuring that my kids where successful was the easiest way to ensure my ... was going to be good simply because I see way to many examples of non successful kids still being a drain on their parents into their latter life. Not worried about that... we (family) shared in everything through development yrs (birth to 18)
again that was our choice. ... OK, we each make our choices and live with the consequences
also in the interest of full disclosure, my parents paid for my college degree and helped out with my graduate studies and I definitely appreciate how much of a help that was to me. I was a caregiver for my disabled parents the day I turned 18, I helped put my siblings through college, LONG before I could afford to go myself (I had to pay up front and employer reimbursed (for 3.0 and above)
I'm a chemist and never worked for an employee that remotely paid any tuition assistance.
My employers paid 100% for (5) degrees. This is not unusual, even Walmart offers tuition assistance today...
Many options in life... In no way did my kids suffer for my early retirement, they will achieve it far sooner than I did, and they have a great Quality of life in the process (including leaving home by age 18 (They had already built their own homes 3 yrs earlier, with our help of course... teaching them how to build, manage finances and survive the legal terrain and inspections. ) Few would put their careers on hold to homeschool and care and teach their kids skills. Few know how, fewer would commit to actually doing it (day-by-day, hour by hour). Many of our peers did similar. AS per the Q responding to... MMM and his 'conversation on funding college' (which I presume he can handle himself! better than we can GUESS!)_
I trust we ALL will survive (including our kids...) and hopefully get to that golden age (whenever you think that is...)
My kids knew the ropes well before age 18, so if they HAD to... they could have cared for me and the farm (as I did for my parents). Not a choice, just a responsibility. Mine were better prepared than I was the day I got the call (on my 18th B-day)
My employers paid 100% for (5) degrees. This is not unusual, even Walmart offers tuition assistance today...
Many options in life... In no way did my kids suffer for my early retirement, they will achieve it far sooner than I did, and they have a great Quality of life in the process (including leaving home by age 18 (They had already built their own homes 3 yrs earlier, with our help of course... teaching them how to build, manage finances and survive the legal terrain and inspections. ) Few would put their careers on hold to homeschool and care and teach their kids skills. Few know how, fewer would commit to actually doing it (day-by-day, hour by hour). Many of our peers did similar. AS per the Q responding to... MMM and his 'conversation on funding college' (which I presume he can handle himself! better than we can GUESS!)_
I trust we ALL will survive (including our kids...) and hopefully get to that golden age (whenever you think that is...)
My kids knew the ropes well before age 18, so if they HAD to... they could have cared for me and the farm (as I did for my parents). Not a choice, just a responsibility. Mine were better prepared than I was the day I got the call (on my 18th B-day)
I wouldn't want my kids to leave home by 18. In many countries nobody gets kicked out at 18.
I wouldn't want my kids to leave home by 18. In many countries nobody gets kicked out at 18.
What he says may have been true for his own kids. But it wouldn't be true of the average or even above average eighteen year old. We don't judge intelligence by comparing the average intellect to Albert Einstein. My real concern about a post like his is that it offers a false narrative to a parent who simply wants to escape any responsibility for helping to educate their son or daughter. Most young people need that help--even if a few do not.
How many 18 y/o can survive on their own in NYC? San Francisco? Seattle? California? Washington?
I have no clue, but certainly my future 18 y/o can't/won't but we're in Seattle, so yeah... I grew up in Texas and I had MANY friends and classmates that left home early... junior or senior year usually, but there was one sophomore that got herself into the "family way" so to speak and she left home before her junior year started.
Stealthrabbit reminds me of Captain Fantastic. Did you ever see that movie or how it ended?
How many 18 y/o can survive on their own in NYC? San Francisco? Seattle? California? Washington?
I left home at 18 and never looked back. I honestly can't fathom living with my parents. My sister stayed until she was in her mid 20's, my dad really sheltered her and as a consequence she never really developed the living by oneself/bootstrap mindset. She has relied on parent support and now spousal support her whole life.
What he says may have been true for his own kids. But it wouldn't be true of the average or even above average eighteen year old. We don't judge intelligence by comparing the average intellect to Albert Einstein. My real concern about a post like his is that it offers a false narrative to a parent who simply wants to escape any responsibility for helping to educate their son or daughter. Most young people need that help--even if a few do not.
Meh, I think by the time the kid's 18, the pattern is already set, by both parents and kids. People see what they want to see. It seems to me StealthRabbit made it clear he was an actively involved parent who didn't just send his kids out into the world unprepared.
Meh, I think by the time the kid's 18, the pattern is already set, by both parents and kids. People see what they want to see. It seems to me StealthRabbit made it clear he was an actively involved parent who didn't just send his kids out into the world unprepared.
Very true but somehow in this country we've embraced this idea that at "18" they are grown adults who have it all figured out .
I remember that was the argument some cities wanted to use to lower the drinking age to 18. "well they can go to war at 18 but they can't buy a beer"?
Now I grew up in the 60's when you could actually get a decent manufacturing job at 18 and I know I and most of the kids I know were knuckleheads at that age. I went away for college and my first term was a disaster until my mother showed up at my dorm room door and not so politely told me to get my act together or life as I knew it would cease to exist.
lol, I took that threat seriously.
One thing I notice about the c-d is everyone here is above average. lol look at this thread, immediately a whole bunch of folks have posted how they built their own house and how easy it is. and of course everyone here had their jobs pay for their college education. (go to NCES to find out how many companyies actually do that. lol. I guess everyone here works for UPS, lol ironically the top 10 ones that do there are limits. UPs only gives 5500 bucks a year. lol you'd be a long time getting a degree on that) . so I take stuff with a grain of salt.
Regardless to the fact that a simple google search reveals that less than 7% of all house are built by the owner/occupant.
So yeah, MM may have slapped together his home, the person in NYC?? not so much.
like I said, if this stuff was sooo easy to do, everyone would do it. Yes you are correct that not every one has to go to college but the reality still is that most high paying jobs ask for a degree.
Again it is all about choices. Would I have gambled with my kids probability of success to retire at 40?? No. Do i criticize someone else who would make different choices?? Of course not
Last edited by eliza61nyc; 11-07-2018 at 07:09 AM..
Very true but somehow in this country we've embraced this idea that at "18" they are grown adults who have it all figured out .
I remember that was the argument some cities wanted to use to lower the drinking age to 18. "well they can go to war at 18 but they can't buy a beer"?
Now I grew up in the 60's when you could actually get a decent manufacturing job at 18 and I know I and most of the kids I know were knuckleheads at that age. I went away for college and my first term was a disaster until my mother showed up at my dorm room door and not so politely told me to get my act together or life as I knew it would cease to exist.
lol, I took that threat seriously.
One thing I notice about the c-d is everyone here is above average. lol look at this thread, immediately a whole bunch of folks have posted how they built their own house and how easy it is. and of course everyone here had their jobs pay for their college education. (go to NCES to find out how many companyies actually do that. lol. I guess everyone here works for UPS, lol ironically the top 10 ones that do there are limits. UPs only gives 5500 bucks a year. lol you'd be a long time getting a degree on that) . so I take stuff with a grain of salt.
Regardless to the fact that a simple google search reveals that less than 7% of all house are built by the owner/occupant.
So yeah, MM may have slapped together his home, the person in NYC?? not so much.
like I said, if this stuff was sooo easy to do, everyone would do it. Yes you are correct that not every one has to go to college but the reality still is that most high paying jobs ask for a degree.
Again it is all about choices. Would I have gambled with my kids probability of success to retire at 40?? No. Do i criticize someone else who would make different choices?? Of course not
I worked at UPS after high school as well. The community college I worked at as well charged $50/credit hour. I also transferred into a typical 4-year program with a ton of credits mostly paid for. Saved oodles of money. Just because you didn't find a better way to do things doesn't mean many did not.
Doing the expensive but dubious value degree thing is easy, but many are led down the wrong path. A lot of tech companies no longer care about degrees, they want relevant experience, and there are coding schools that I have personally known people attend and walk out of with good jobs waiting on the other side. All for around $6k and under six months.
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look at this thread, immediately a whole bunch of folks have posted how they built their own house and how easy it is. and of course everyone here had their jobs pay for their college education. (go to NCES to find out how many companyies actually do that. lol. I guess everyone here works for UPS, lol ironically the top 10 ones that do there are limits. UPs only gives 5500 bucks a year. lol you'd be a long time getting a degree on that) . so I take stuff with a grain of salt.
