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Old 11-16-2018, 04:23 PM
 
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https://tulsage.wordpress.com/2017/1...-at-christmas/
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Old 11-16-2018, 05:02 PM
 
Location: Portal to the Pacific
5,119 posts, read 5,086,104 times
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Oh absolutely. I've struggled with Christmas present buying starting the first year I was ever expected to buy someone else a present (2nd grade, c. 1986). Back in those days the schools would open up "secret santa's workshop" in the library a few weeks before Christmas break began. I think we got a catalogue ahead of time or we just took a tour of what was available a day or two before we went "shopping". They had candy and other edibles, but what I remember most was all the junk you could buy. I bought my dad a resin duck figurine. I bought my mom a heart shaped porcelain box. I think I got my sister one of those dyed oil and water desk toy thingies (whatever they're called, I'm sure at least one of you know what I'm talking about). It was a highly anticipated event for the students.

I wish those feelings stayed with me because now I don't want to exchange gifts at all. I can't buy anything without thinking of the environmental impact, which I have to say, really ruins it for me. Also, buying crap, especially crap nobody needs, is expensive. And then throw it in the different levels of expectations and that pretty much kills any Christmas spirit.

We've been reducing our gift buying throughout the years to the point where my family knows they can only expect to receive a package of homemade cookie assortment and regional foods: Coffee, huckleberry, salmon..

This year we are taking it to a whole other level and not doing the Santa drop for the kids (15 and 12). We are giving them each maybe 2 gifts and a stocking. One gift from mom, another from dad.. and a stocking of Christmas candy (and an orange!).
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Old 11-16-2018, 05:14 PM
 
219 posts, read 101,114 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flyingsaucermom View Post
Oh absolutely. I've struggled with Christmas present buying starting the first year I was ever expected to buy someone else a present (2nd grade, c. 1986). Back in those days the schools would open up "secret santa's workshop" in the library a few weeks before Christmas break began. I think we got a catalogue ahead of time or we just took a tour of what was available a day or two before we went "shopping". They had candy and other edibles, but what I remember most was all the junk you could buy. I bought my dad a resin duck figurine. I bought my mom a heart shaped porcelain box. I think I got my sister one of those dyed oil and water desk toy thingies (whatever they're called, I'm sure at least one of you know what I'm talking about). It was a highly anticipated event for the students.

I wish those feelings stayed with me because now I don't want to exchange gifts at all. I can't buy anything without thinking of the environmental impact, which I have to say, really ruins it for me. Also, buying crap, especially crap nobody needs, is expensive. And then throw it in the different levels of expectations and that pretty much kills any Christmas spirit.

We've been reducing our gift buying throughout the years to the point where my family knows they can only expect to receive a package of homemade cookie assortment and regional foods: Coffee, huckleberry, salmon..

This year we are taking it to a whole other level and not doing the Santa drop for the kids (15 and 12). We are giving them each maybe 2 gifts and a stocking. One gift from mom, another from dad.. and a stocking of Christmas candy (and an orange!).
Your 12 and 15 yr olds will be grown before you know it, I hope they still can enjoy another Christmas where they are spoilt a bit. I hope Santa gives them a gift.
Time goes by very fast after these ages.
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Old 11-16-2018, 06:23 PM
 
Location: Bay Area, CA
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Nope... one of the few advantages to being Jewish!

But even for Chanukah and birthdays, my family has gradually adopted a "no gifts policy." There are exceptions, of course, and I try to get stuff for the nieces/nephews here & there; but we don't expect anything from each other, and certainly wouldn't guilt anyone over it. Most of those items end up sitting in a closet/garage anyway, until they get re-gifted or donated after a period of time. I won't turn down a check or gift card, though! LOL
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Old 11-16-2018, 06:25 PM
 
5,098 posts, read 2,743,062 times
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It’s possible to give others inexpensive thoughtful gifts for christmas... I asked my wife for a coffee mug and 2019 Calendar from Photofy that is customized with pictures of our memorable moments from 2018. It will cost my wife $40 and I’ll be more than happy that anything else expensive she would buy.
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Old 11-16-2018, 06:32 PM
 
Location: Bay Area, CA
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Originally Posted by sparkypeanut View Post
Your 12 and 15 yr olds will be grown before you know it, I hope they still can enjoy another Christmas where they are spoilt a bit. I hope Santa gives them a gift.
Time goes by very fast after these ages.
You know what? I only remember a few of the MOST special (Chanukah/B-day) gifts from my childhood... the rest was likely enjoyed for a few days, maybe weeks, and then completely forgotten. And we didn't get a ton of presents, even though my parents could easily afford to spoil us. They had a fairly strict rule of ONE gift per night for Chanukah, and actually gave away our gifts the one time we fought over them. I appreciate that now, more than I would have appreciated a dozen+ trinkets every year.

The fondest memories I have from childhood revolved around special moments, not the material items we received. That's why Thanksgiving was always my favorite holiday, as it was the one time when we all (immediate family + our "adopted west coast family") got together to enjoy each other's company. No gifts, just good food and togetherness. Especially now that some of these loved ones are gone, I look back on those holidays with a bittersweet happiness.

Also, I doubt their 12 & 15 year-old kids still believe in Santa.
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Old 11-16-2018, 06:34 PM
 
Location: Bay Area, CA
29,041 posts, read 45,005,408 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SWFL_Native View Post
It’s possible to give others inexpensive thoughtful gifts for christmas... I asked my wife for a coffee mug and 2019 Calendar from Photofy that is customized with pictures of our memorable moments from 2018. It will cost my wife $40 and I’ll be more than happy that anything else expensive she would buy.
For sure! One of the only things my sister gives me annually (for the holidays) is a custom calendar-mousepad, with photos of her children on it. I keep the latest one on my work desk, and look forward to getting these every year. They probably cost like $10 through Shutterfly, but mean more to me than something fancy and impersonal.
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Old 11-16-2018, 07:21 PM
 
Location: Portal to the Pacific
5,119 posts, read 5,086,104 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sparkypeanut View Post
Your 12 and 15 yr olds will be grown before you know it, I hope they still can enjoy another Christmas where they are spoilt a bit. I hope Santa gives them a gift.
Time goes by very fast after these ages.
You're assuming that they've enjoyed the previous ones.
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Old 11-17-2018, 12:43 AM
 
Location: California
30,684 posts, read 33,445,013 times
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I only give token gifts to people these days. My kids are adults and our family is small and none of us want the others to spend money on things we can buy ourselves. Plus nobody wants clutter. Fortunately it worked out that we are on the same page. Some friends give me gifts, I don't usually give them gifts but they know this about me. I am always happy to receive what makes them happy to give, even if I don't like fudge or bubble bath. I'm the surprising person who gives a gift when the circumstances are right and I run across something that I know a friend would enjoy. I just don't follow the holiday calendar
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Old 11-17-2018, 04:12 AM
Status: "Excited to move to Vegas!" (set 25 days ago)
 
Location: Beaverton, OR
5,529 posts, read 5,897,134 times
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I enjoy giving my GF gifts, seeing her happy, but that’s about it. The rest is an obligation. My dad can buy everything he wants, he’s impossible to shop for 3 times a year (Xmas, Fathers Day, birthday), and now days I mostly just buy what I want when I want it. I still ask for stuff for Xmas but it’s more awkward somehow, like I only do so because I’m asked, and it’s not that I don’t appreciate nice things but I don’t want anyone to think it’s expected of them. Sometimes my dad seems weird about money and I don’t want him ever thinking he has to get me anything, I want him to want to do it otherwise it’s ok if we just forget it lol no big deal.
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