Co-Executor Sibling Nightmare

[PittsburghPatty]

Hi Kathryn:
I have to say that my family dynamics were troubled for many years with my sister behaving badly on occasion but more passive aggressively given her wish to look good for our parents. When parents die is when the gloves come off and it becomes war. While I was distracted by my mom's care and her worsening state, my sister and her husband were ramping up for battle. I was distracted so what was said got swept under the carpet. Example: when we were told my mom was terminal and I asked them about plans to return to bury my mom in our hometown (which is an 8 hour drive), my sister told me there was no room in their vehicle for me, since her daughter's boyfriend might come. And when we were waiting to meet with the Hospice physician, she told me, without emotion, that we didnt have to stay at the same hotel. I heard these things (and many other things) and was in such a state of upset that I didnt address them. Cruel and cold.
They were clear warnings that things would get very bad and they did.
Thank God there was a lawyer involved.
Thanks for your advice, Kathryn--very wise and I will use it.

[jencam]

I think it is very big of the nephew and niece to give up their inheritance for you! Does that not console you as to them?

[PittsburghPatty]

I believe I honored my mother, respected her wishes and am committed to an ongoing positive relationship with my niece and nephew. I will continue to do the right thing.

Thank you to all who were supportive, insightful and lifted me up during a very difficult time of my life.




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