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Old 10-13-2009, 11:02 PM
35 posts, read 111,894 times
Reputation: 32


About 2 months ago our family got the cutest little kitty. We all wanted a cat. We had a lab chow mix already so we slowly introduced them and the dog did not show interest or any aggression toward the kitten right away. There were times when the dog was sitting next to us by the couch and would growl at the cat when she got closer. I think this was because the dog was jealous and wanted his time with us. As the months went by the two animals seemed to mix get along well and at times the kitty would literally take her paws and give the dog a kiss in the morning. Yesterday morning while the dog was eating the kitten walked by his bowl and the dog bit the cat causing the cat to go into seizure like movements. We quickly took the cat to the vet and they tried to help her. A few hours later they recommended the kitten be euthanized. We tried to save the kitten. My pregnant wife has been crying on and off since yesterday. I have a horrible empty feeling inside. I burried the cat yesterday in the back yard. It was a terrible day.

My problem now is that I am mad at the dog and have kept him in the fenced area outside since yesterday. I keep seeing the image of the poor kitty after being bit. The kitten had such a good personality. She was just starting to learn. The best cat our family has ever seen. The problem is I don't even want to look at the dog. He does have food and water out there but has been an indoor dog. I can't get past this. I know he is just a dog and does not know what he did. It's tough to just let the dog in the house and act like nothing happened. What should I do with the dog? What is the best way to deal with this situation?

Old 10-14-2009, 12:04 AM
1,688 posts, read 6,892,460 times
Reputation: 1988
While I can sympathise with how you feel, I truly can, you are being very unfair to the dog.

You know and you even state the dog doesn't know what he did. I'm going to disagree with that. What the dogs knows is/was this: cat got too close to my food, I bit it. That is what the dog knows, the rest is merely human spin and (mis)interpretation.

To banish the dog serves no purpose, none. It does nothing for you, it does nothing - less than nothing - for the dog. You're posting on here feeling miserable and the dog is probably lying outside wondering how he got there. He'll know emotions are running high, but he hasn't the slightest clue why.

You simply cannot continue down this path - it's destructive to your own well-being and that of the dog. If you are going to rebuild your relationship with the dog, you must forgive.

As cliche as it is, time is a great healer and in time, you will progress past the state you're in now. But in the meantime you need to put an end to the banishment lest it cause further damage to all concerned. I appreciate you're still going to have mixed feelings about the dog, and that's to be expected. But in order to get to the point in time where you can forgive, you need to start rebuilding your human/canine relationship now. There will be less joy in it, there may be resentment (and it would be only natural that there was) but you can, and in my opinion you should, at least go through the motions. There's comfort in routine and comfort is something your household needs.

Of course you will grieve and mourn the loss of your cat. It is only right that you do. But it need not be mutually exclusive to looking after, and eventually forgiving, your dog. It might seem as if it's a very big ask and right now it probably is. But hold that thought for it will, eventually, happen.

The dog will forgive you for the banishment no questions asked. There's a lesson in that.
Old 10-14-2009, 01:15 AM
Location: Mostly in my head
19,817 posts, read 55,847,710 times
Reputation: 18999
While this is a tragedy, the dog didn't do it on purpose. That is, he didn't mean to cause the kitten's death, he meant to guard his food from another animal. It was unfortunate that the kitten was so much smaller. Please bring him in and try to understand dog behavior. A great place to start is the Book "The Other End of the Leash" by Patricia McConnell. Your library can probably get it. I've owned dogs for 40+ yrs and I learned something new in the first 2 chapters.
Old 10-14-2009, 01:16 AM
Location: Big Island- Hawaii, AK, WA where the whales are!
1,492 posts, read 3,651,646 times
Reputation: 780
I am very sorry for you and the dog. Puttting it outside will not cause any but more problems. thank god it didn't happen to you and your new baby on the way. I would say you really need a trainier to help with your new family and new baby soon as if not now. Your dog doesn't know what it did and how it affected your family. Your wife is proble freaking out of what can happen in the future. If you can not follow up find a good family to move your dog onto. I do not believe in giving up your dog because your family changed but if this is last move on your part than at least find a good home.
Old 10-14-2009, 01:21 AM
Location: Alaska
4,977 posts, read 4,508,593 times
Reputation: 7168
FiveHorses and SouthernBelleInUtah have said it beautifully what I would have written. My heart goes out to you, your family and the doggie that did not mean to.
Old 10-14-2009, 01:34 AM
Location: Mayacama Mtns in CA
14,523 posts, read 7,571,423 times
Reputation: 11313
Wow, just wow. I have to make the disclaimer here that I'm much more of a cat-person than a dog-person. But my first and overriding thought is how could you ever trust that chow around the baby after it's born?

Were it my home, the dog would be gone. . .
Old 10-14-2009, 01:44 AM
Location: Big Island- Hawaii, AK, WA where the whales are!
1,492 posts, read 3,651,646 times
Reputation: 780
I disagree I have seen a pit bull let a kitten suck its neck. Sleep together in a dog bowl. I have a border collie at the moment that will chase anything but he has his cats. He chews their bellies for itchy spots.I spent the weekend with a cat he doesn't know at all and no problems. They splet the night together for two nights in close space. My dog will not chase his kitties but will chase some cats.

As a cat person for life and a dog person (along with many other breeds of animals) dogs and cats can get allong great. I don't think the OP had any problem other than a brief unexpected bite. Not that it is ok at all. But sounds like the dog was only showing domiance and got a unforunante bit. Mine will always show domiance in situations around food. And after the cats hold off they eat out of the same bowl. and go camping together.
Old 10-14-2009, 01:55 AM
Location: Big Island- Hawaii, AK, WA where the whales are!
1,492 posts, read 3,651,646 times
Reputation: 780
I gues the issue is much more about me. My partents had a cocker spaniel and I was born. The spaniel bite at me when I was child. They got rid of the dog. I wanted animals growing up but because of this theey didn't allow it till I was about 9.. for a dog anyway. Love my cats which no dog can replace turned allo of cats into dogs.

I can make any cat into a dog but a dog you can not replace and you can not replace a good hunting riding camping cat. No a kid don't have that answer>
Old 10-14-2009, 02:28 AM
Location: Mayacama Mtns in CA
14,523 posts, read 7,571,423 times
Reputation: 11313
I think the point I was making is, how could a person take even the slightest chance that this particular dog would bite again? And with the likely hood that it would be the child he would bite?

I know I could never trust that dog again.
Old 10-14-2009, 06:04 AM
Location: California
10,091 posts, read 36,797,046 times
Reputation: 22096
Agree with Five Horses and SouthernBelle....and the fact of the matter is, the kitten should have never been put into that situation. I am truely sorry for the loss of your kitten.
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