Trying to Understand Why Everyone Hates Philly? (wage, living in)

[juniperbleu]

Originally Posted by G Goo

Sorry for the passionate defense, but I hear this so often and it ALWAYS bothers me when it comes up.

I definitely agree, and this complaint is not unique to Philadelphia. People complain about it all the time in DC, especially those from small towns in the Midwest or further south. Really, I don't understand why it's such a big deal. I try to give people a courteous "hello" or "good morning" (mainly because I realized that it must really suck for all the newspaper guys and vendors to see nothing but sleepy scowls in the morning, so I figured I'd give them one quick smile), but if it's not reciprocated I don't care. There are more important things to worry about than whether the passersby are angry. Whenever I've stopped to ask a question I've never had a big problem with rudeness, nor has anyone I know who has visited Philly. Actually, the friends who have visited usually talk about how they liked the people.

[Philly56]

I am one who has that love-hate for my city.... I'm ready to move but when I visit places, I will tell someone I am from PHILLY in a hearbeat....

[chewy078]

I was born in raised in Philly. I grew up in Mt.Airy. I moved to Chicago for the last three years and while I loved Chicago. I moved back .there is nothing like Philly.

[carolinajack]

Originally Posted by G Goo

As a lifelong (almost) Philadelphian and someone who has lived outside the Northeast part of the country (Montana, Texas for 4 years) I have come to discover that when people exhibit dismay by the lack of smiles on the street (which is usually misconstrued as anger or hostility, but not what it really is; indifference) it usually says more about the dismayed than the passer-by. I feel that people who NEED this vapid friendliness at times when it is not necessary are looking for strangers to fill a void usually reserved for friends, family neighbors….people who are familiar. What’s missing….who knows? When I lived out west I was bombarded by sickly-sweet greetings wherever I went….restaurants, stores, etc. I kind of liked it…initially. Then when I discovered some traits that their boring friendliness was masking; passive-aggressiveness, xenophobia, racism, the frustrating inability to be direct…..I discovered how pointless the initial behavior was. And, I suppose my self-esteem is strong enough that I really don’t need a stranger’s acknowledgement to brighten my day. I usually reserve that task for myself, my friends, my family and neighbors.

Something else I discovered about Philadelphians and Northeasterners in general vs. those from more “friendly” areas. When you get past the indifference often you will find some of the most interesting, smart, funny, complicated people that this country can produce. Conversely, out west (and this is a generalization; certainly does not apply to all I met out there) when I would get past that friendly veneer I’d find the things I mentioned above. So what would you rather have, a delicious and surprising treat, or a chocolate covered turd?

Sorry for the passionate defense, but I hear this so often and it ALWAYS bothers me when it comes up.

i wish that were true but not talkng about vapid faux friendliness, i am talking about real friendliness. I would rather friendliness that is real than indifference, anger and bitterness until you peel back the skin. As it usually isnt any more honest than the vapid friendliness

[G Goo]

Originally Posted by carolinajack

i wish that were true but not talkng about vapid faux friendliness, i am talking about real friendliness. I would rather friendliness that is real than indifference, anger and bitterness until you peel back the skin. As it usually isnt any more honest than the vapid friendliness

I just think the "real" friendliness you speak of is purposeless and often a facade. And how do you know if it is "real" if you have never met the person before? And boy this "anger and bitterness" you describe is something I don't see much, if at all. I think Philly people are just fine on the friendly front and most people who think we are generally unfriendly are hyper-sensitive and unrealistic. I, for one, consider myself VERY friendly but I'll be darned if I'm going to smile and wave howdy to everyone I see on the street. I'll hold a door, say thank you, etc....but that's about it....and that's about what I see from 90% of my fellow Philadelphians on a daily basis. From Mt Airy, to the R7, to Center City and even South Philly. Like I said before, this criticism of the friendliness of Philly says more about you than it says about us.

[juniperbleu]

Originally Posted by carolinajack

it usually isnt any more honest than the vapid friendliness

Wow, that sounds really pessimistic...

[AC/PHILLY/NJ/NYC]

Most people that hate Philly simply do not enjoy the big city lifestyle. These are the people that think all big cities are crime filled without doing proper research. I do have to admit...... A show called Parking Wars on A&E did not help the Philly reputation.

[loose cannon]

From a cultural standpoint Philly is a good place. All the top bands come and play in the area. There are many venues like the TLA, the Trocadero, and even the Wachovia Ctr. The local scene is also good and seems to be recovering from the stagnant, indy-rock malaise that dominated for too long. Even so, some of those bands were great. The Teeth and Dr. Dog are two good examples. Then the pretentious hipsters went too far, and people wanted to rock again.

Otherwise, there are tons of dullards and cultural philistines who roam the streets and think the alphabet is E A G L E S. When Im in Philly I ignore these people. You will never catch me at Chickie and Pete's.

[treetorn]

They hate it because it sucks.

Philadelphia could be a beautiful city that could rival anyone in the country. It has huge potential but is run into the ground by a mayer who does not understand economics, a ruling council composed of people with less than room temp IQ, by a pay to play attitude at city hall, by race hustlers who go after cops a that actually put criminals in Jail, by the releasing of these same criminals on to the streets, by unions that extort everyone, by a welfare system that causes strife and misery, by a transportation system that breeds contempt, by criminal gangs who are allowed to roam free, and by taxes which have driven just about everyone with any net worth out of the city.

[Fina1]

When I first visited Philadelphia I thought it was an amazing place.
I grew up in the suburbs of CT and wanted to go to college in a large city to have a change of scenery and experience a different side of life.

My first year in Philadelphia was all right because I lived in the dormitories. I only really saw the nice parts of the city and enjoyed some of the night life.

I spent a lot of time in Center City and South Philly and really loved it.

Fast forward one year later, and I'm living in a rented house with 3 friends on 47th and Kingsessing Ave. Life quickly got different as my friends and I got part time jobs here and my other friends lived in their own houses and had to walk to campus.

My best friend, while walking home from work, had rocks thrown at him from children and chased all the way home. He bought a car just to avoid it in the future.

Another friend was walking to school when he was ambushed by a group of teenagers, dragged behind a campus building, beaten, and robbed in broad daylight right across from a security booth.

Another was walking down the road that intersects the campus and was pelted with eggs and chased by a group of childen, one wielding a baseball bat.

Another was walking 2 blocks from campus when he was approached by a group of teenagers, punched in the face, and robbed.

Besides, this all occured in the area that everyone calls "University City" and some people describe as safe. And this is just what happened within 3 years to people I knew in my school. Who knows what else happened to others I didn't know.

In 2007 Philadelphia had an average of at least 1 murder per day.

When you're in nice places like Center City, Old City, South Philly, or nicer neighborhoods, you might not see this stuff. You see nice historic buildings and, yes, the city looks really nice and there is a lot to do.

But when you go to 'University City', West Philly, and some other places, it's an entirely different place.

There was a house one block from where I used to live with so many people living in it that they had 8 trash cans outside, all of which were almost always full. It smelled terrible. One of the women who lived there wouldn't even walk to them to throw out the trash. She'd stand at the door and toss trash bags and dirty baby diapers across the lawn to the cans, and often they didn't land inside. The sidewalk in front of their house was littered with trash and diapers.
Disgusting.

The city is full of lawlessness. From murder and robbery to cops spitting on the sidewalk, littering, cyclists on sidewalks plowing through pedistrians, eating on SEPTA, and other criminal activities.

A lot of people have lost a sense of common decency and courtesy. So many people don't follow the laws and they're hardly enforced.

The city...the buildings...is nice.

A lot of the people are not.