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Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,733,093 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Declan's Dad
That's great. Hopefully you will still be "pouring it up" in another ten years when you're 34 or even another ten after that when you're 44.
There is a major tone of contempt in your post. What problem do you have with a 24 year old guy who would not make a great parent anyway, deciding to enjoy his life how he sees fit? (BTW my "pouring it up" is two or three glasses of wine or beer over a three hour period and I always have a sober way to get home if I plan to be tipsy) See it is this kind of thinking of why a lot of childfree people think parents are crazy at times. Parents think that since they have kids they can tell what to do, they think they can tell others what to do with their lives.
The thinking that everyone should be a parent, settled down and married by age 25 or you are a loser is common in my previous residence of Kentucky. Exactly why I got on the first thing smoking to Washington, as soon as I got a job offer.
Babies and children are part of life even if they are not a part of yours. They go out in public, they are probably part of your extended family, etc.. Any dislike that leads to changing your behavior to avoid something you dislike or fear is cause for concern. My daughter is not a fan of spiders, but if she changed her behavior to avoid them that might signal a phobia.
Perfect example of those with children, (who do not 'properly', whatever that means) control them, as to the parents being 'selfish'. Causing me to change my behavior comes at some expense, because of my dislike. For example, flying business class to avoid them, only going to exclusive or over-21 places. Living in places that do not allow children....
I fail to find the cuteness when little Johnny pounds his toy truck on a $3000 end table in my home.... and the parents are all googly-eyed over how precious that is... The houses are not child-proof, will never be, periculo vestro ingredimini!
Forcing others to change their behaviors due to things that have been stated in other posts as 'none of your business', is a wonderful definition of selfishness.
What are "valid" (even though validity is subjective) reasons for not wanting children?
I will admit that I detest children. Frankly, anybody under the mid-20s I seem to hold an innate dislike towards. I feel for this reason, I'm scared I may even abuse any children I ever have. So for this reason, I don't want any children.
i don't see any reason you have to justify not wanting kids.. its your choice.
Perfect example of those with children, (who do not 'properly', whatever that means) control them, as to the parents being 'selfish'. Causing me to change my behavior comes at some expense, because of my dislike. For example, flying business class to avoid them, only going to exclusive or over-21 places. Living in places that do not allow children....
I fail to find the cuteness when little Johnny pounds his toy truck on a $3000 end table in my home.... and the parents are all googly-eyed over how precious that is... The houses are not child-proof, will never be, periculo vestro ingredimini!
Forcing others to change their behaviors due to things that have been stated in other posts as 'none of your business', is a wonderful definition of selfishness.
No flames please, just a personal choice.
Hear hear! My partner's little niece came over to our house and she tore the felt on my pool table. I was so angry. I had to spend $1700 replacing the felt the next week. It's OK because she said she was sorry.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,733,093 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by Yellow Jacket
Hear hear! My partner's little niece came over to our house and she tore the felt on my pool table. I wanted to crush her skull I was so angry. I had to spend $1700 replacing the felt. It's ok because she said she was sorry.
After these stories, am I out of bounds for not allowing children in my home at any time?
After these stories, am I out of bounds for not allowing children in my home at any time?
Your life, your choice. That would never have worked in my extended family because there was always someone with a small child, and with us, family togetherness comes first.
Perfect example of those with children, (who do not 'properly', whatever that means) control them, as to the parents being 'selfish'. Causing me to change my behavior comes at some expense, because of my dislike. For example, flying business class to avoid them, only going to exclusive or over-21 places. Living in places that do not allow children....
I fail to find the cuteness when little Johnny pounds his toy truck on a $3000 end table in my home.... and the parents are all googly-eyed over how precious that is... The houses are not child-proof, will never be, periculo vestro ingredimini!
Forcing others to change their behaviors due to things that have been stated in other posts as 'none of your business', is a wonderful definition of selfishness.
No flames please, just a personal choice.
You do not have to invite people with children into your home, of course. That's your choice. If you invite them, though, then you have to adjust your behavior to them. They are the guests in your home and as a host, you accommodate your guests. While pounding his truck on any table is not great, toddlers *will* pound things.
Now, if the child does break something expensive (or not), as a parent, I would expect to pay for it.
Do you remember what you were like as a toddler? Maybe you can ask your parents if you liked to pretend to hammer toys, etc.
Hear hear! My partner's little niece came over to our house and she tore the felt on my pool table. I was so angry. I had to spend $1700 replacing the felt the next week. It's OK because she said she was sorry.
You should, of course, ask the parents of this child to pay for the damage. And, of course, you could not invite her over (if your partner is ok with that). If you are going to have her around, you might want to make sure that expensive things that can be damaged are inaccessible.
After these stories, am I out of bounds for not allowing children in my home at any time?
As someone else said, your life, your choice. You can always visit only in the homes of the person with children. As a parent, I found that easier anyway, since my home was childproofed.
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